# 12 years Just Venting



## rageagainstitall (Dec 16, 2018)

Hey there! I've been lurking in the forums for years now, off and on, but today I signed up b/c I'm kinda at my wits end.

Background info, I'm 25, been this way since I was 13. I've tried diet changes, Blessed Herb colon cleanses, parasite cleanses, master cleanses, charcoal tabs, flat-D, supplements recommended on here lol. Nothing's worked, and things have started to get worse (noisy worse, yes it's a possibility, pray it never gets that bad for you). I did recently go to physical therapy, and after a finger up the rear, we agreed that my muscles are too tight. With further research, I've learned that unconsciously, I've been squeezing and holding my external sphincter muscle. I literally tighten it all day. Read the link below and see if it reminds you of you. It sure as heck reminded me of me.

https://betterhumans.coach.me/watch-your-ass-an-unusual-shortcut-to-full-mind-body-relaxation-dad9d65affe5

My favorite parts are: "When we feel overwhelmed, clenching muscles gives a false sense of control because of the feeling of exertion. The anal sphincters get clenched most often unconsciously because they are hidden from view.

Clenching is a way to literally reduce your feeling in your body. To truly relax is to truly let all the world in; to surrender control. It requires a level of faith and trust in your circumstances. It's far more psychological than physical, (and perhaps more spiritual than psychological)."

I've tried to stop clenching on my own, but it's hard to consciously quit a habit that you've been doing for over a decade. I was supposed to go back for biofeedback, but the co-pay is too high, gotta wait till I can afford it. So, my ex once told me that when I'd sleep, I didn't have leaky gas, which definitely led me to believe it's a conscious effort. The external sphincter is a voluntary muscle. I have to choose to tighten or loosen it, but when I'm knocked out, my body functions in its natural state. Also, in my case, I have anxiety and have been in emotionally abusive relationships my whole life, including familial w/ my mom *so *I've always felt out of control; it makes sense for me. Ironic though, clenching the muscle to gain control, only to lose it even more.

I've started taking Ashwagandha. It's an Indian and African herb that's used to treat anxiety, among a ton of other conditions. When I took it, my muscles started to relax. It didn't 100% cure me, but I didn't feel like I had as much gas as I usually do. I felt mellow & at peace. I don't drink milk, only almond, and I was on the candida diet for 5 weeks once. Didn't fix anything, but I'm definitely reactive to gluten. The only time in my life when I had a flat stomach was then.

*Lastly*, PokerFace kinda changed my life, b/c he was the one who first got me questioning if it was a muscle issue. Others have been cured before through biofeedback on here, but he kinda went deep w/ it. This past November, when I'd feel gas coming, I'd overarch my back like in his post, and I learned that I could hold my gas by doing that. I moonlight as a respite lifesharing provider. (I bring mentally and behaviorally handicapped people into my home & take care of em.) Most of mine are high functioning, so their reactions to bad smells are basically the same as anyone else's. So, I tried it while around my charges, and it worked!! Gave me the courage to see a doctor and go to physical therapy.

Just, try not to let life beat you down so much that you pursue absolute seclusion. I did this past year, not b/c of my condition, just a lot of people I trusted screwed me over, financially, emotionally, sexually, won't go into detail, & now I'm at this point where people in general make me anxious. It's like if my inner circle can **** me over, no one can be trusted







I never thought it'd get this bad. Just shopping at Walmart gives me noisy gas, & I'm a woman (not that it should matter, but yeah, it's extra embarrassing!!) I truly hope next year we all find healing. Oh! & my physical therapist recommended deep stomach breathing and hip loosening stretches. The first week I tried it, I actually noticed some improvement. (I'm gonna start doing them again. Life happened.)


----------



## lone_wolf777 (Dec 20, 2017)

Welcome to the forum (although I wish it didn't have to exist)

My problems started at a similar age. I'm 31 now. I can honestly say, this has absolutely wrecked every aspect of my life. Anyway, your symptoms sound somewhat similar to mine. I also apologize if this might seem like a weird question. But do you ever feel excessive moisture around your anus? Sometimes I experience this and I'm not sure if it's related to leaky gas.


----------



## lone_wolf777 (Dec 20, 2017)

Edit:

this site double posted my last comment


----------



## Lg2001 (May 20, 2018)

I definitely experience excessive moisture around the anus.
Is it just moisture or actually sweat, because if its sweat do you think that could be causing an odour like it does in our armpits?


----------



## lone_wolf777 (Dec 20, 2017)

I doubt that it's sweat. Just a guess because I don't get overly sweaty anywhere else. I've always assumed it was rectal mucus. AKA the body's natural lubrication for bowel movements. Kinda gross but I think the problem might stem from a miscommunication between the brain and the rectum.


----------



## PokerFace (Jan 13, 2017)

Im happy youre good. Im glad I helped. It is, indeed, a treatable condition. The problem is the brain so its a hard fix for most


----------



## rageagainstitall (Dec 16, 2018)

lone_wolf777 said:


> Welcome to the forum (although I wish it didn't have to exist)
> 
> My problems started at a similar age. I'm 31 now. I can honestly say, this has absolutely wrecked every aspect of my life. Anyway, your symptoms sound somewhat similar to mine. I also apologize if this might seem like a weird question. But do you ever feel excessive moisture around your anus? Sometimes I experience this and I'm not sure if it's related to leaky gas.


Aw man, I'm so sorry. I hate that it's taking us this long. Have you visited a doctor about our condition in general? & sorry it took me so long to write. I wasn't receiving notifications about responses.

I personally don't have the excessive moisture, though it may have to do with our anxiety. Over the years, I've had random things go on, like excessive salivating, sweaty feet (something I never had trouble with and swiftly dealt w/ it once I realized my nerves were causing it), sweaty scalp, heightened anxiety & sphincter squeezing from unanticipated noise (I was never jumpy growing up).

But, I really don't know. I've read that a lot of people have the excessive moisture, so maybe I'm an exception, or maybe it depends on the person. I'm really glad you're hanging in there though. It's everything to know I'm not alone in the struggle.

I think the most important part is not losing yourself to it. Now that I'm watching things kinda get worse as I work on letting go of control, regarding my sphincter, I'm learning that the fear is actually more debilitating than the condition. A book I read on anxiety recommended meditation. Over time, it's scientifically proven to shrink the amygdala which in turn lessens the amount of triggered responses we have to stimuli. When I first started doing it, there was def a notable change, but I don't exactly have the patience







. Can't promise it's a cure, but if you submit yourself to it, it'll def soothe the fear & probably some of the symptoms.


----------



## lone_wolf777 (Dec 20, 2017)

I tried the doctor route. Probably one of the most awkward experiences of my entire life. The fact that he was training a med student didn't help either. Like I really wanted an audience while talking about my stinky poo gas problem. Anyway he ordered an anal manometry to test my sphincter strength. Results were normal. I also had a sigmoidoscopy to check further into the rectum. Those results were normal too.

I think there were more invasive tests I could have done. But I would have needed someone to drive me home afterwards. Plus my gastroenterologist wasn't convinced it was worth the effort.


----------



## rageagainstitall (Dec 16, 2018)

Aw man! So, in your case, you aren't subconsciously tightening your sphincter then?

I hate how there's not a cure all. The general vibe has been "different things work for different people."

v.v well, in your opinion what do you think might be causing your symptomatology?


----------



## lone_wolf777 (Dec 20, 2017)

Well, I never noticed anything out of the ordinary regarding anal muscles or bowel function. (besides wetness and odor) Which is probably why doctors have a hard time diagnosing the problem. Everything "seems" normal from a medical perspective. As for whats causing my symptoms, that's the million dollar question. I wish I knew.


----------

