# i had a panic attack last night



## linda2001 (Apr 14, 2001)

Just when i thought things were going good for me, I had my first panic attack in ages last night, it was a bad one. I was on a second date with a guy and we got on really well, i felt really comfortable and relaxed with him although he is a bit full on. I completely panicked and it felt like it came from no where. i have never experienced one this bad. He handled the situation fairly well and was really understanding. We talked on the phone today and he said he knows i have a few things to sort out and he will be there for me if i want to talk about it, he wants to continue seeing me. I said i needed some time to do some thinking and don't know if i want to see him again. I know it was only the second date but we clicked really well and i would like to get to know him better but I think it's unfair to start something as i need to work thru some issues and it's unfair for someone i've only had two dates with to put up with this. I thought i was making really good progress but obviously i'm not. I'm trying to think positive but it is so hard at the moment. I feel so useless and a failure and can imagine myself being 70, alone and still trying to sort thru my issues. That thought alone has just made me more determined to get thru this!







i just want to be normal and feel normal and not get anxious or stressed out about the smallest things. Thankfully my next therapist appointment is this Tuesday.Sorry for ranting.


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## cookies4marilyn (Jun 30, 2000)

Hi Linda...Thought I'd pop in here with a few comments for ya! I was sorry to hear you had a bad panic attack, it must have been hard on you, but, you survived it! And this is the point, even though while you are going throught it at the time, you know that in a given amount of time, you will have passed through it and it will be over with. Your only fear is when and if there will be a next one.Sometimes there are things we have to do, and we do them while not feeling well, or tired, or scared... we do it anyway...we do it feeling not our best. If you really like this guy, then I say, have at it! Life is too short to put everything on hold until you are totally "OK." Who knows, after time, these attacks may get less and less as you say to yourself: "I'm not paying any attention, and doing it anyway!" Easier said than done, but, take it from me, (I'm most likely old enough to be your mom, )if he is a good person, he will care about who you are, not the attacks, and support you.Well, I'll keep you in my thoughts... Good luck, hon!


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## norbert46 (Feb 20, 2001)

Linda, you have a right to be upset and rant to release the frustration. You said that ya'll clicked and he wants to see you more even knowing about the "panic"? My advice is don't punish you and him by pushing away, find a way to see each other at home or some place that is "safe" to your mind that won't be perceived as a threat situation such as a "formal" date out in the auto,etc. I have also been in your predicament with "panic attacks" and can tell you that it will stop when something(therapy,Cognitive, or Hypnotherapy) retrains your subconcious mind. Drugs won't do anything but put us in a "fog" and I nearly went crazy getting off Xanax and don't think my body could take that shock now at age 55! Just keep working in the right direction and it will get better. I don't think we ever completely lose having anxious reactions to extreme situations but it doesn't have to ruin our lives and all people react with some anxiety to bad situations. Good luck, Norb


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## lynneo954 (Dec 30, 2001)

Linda, whats is wrong with you girl!? This guy called and wants to see you again despite the panic attack. My bestfriend has the best husband in the world, she has suffered from panic/anxiety attacks since she was 18 (now 40) and her husband has been her rock. I realize you went through a scary event but to find someone who is sensitive to your wellness, second date or not, he could turn out to be a good friend. I will be honest, I have suffered all my attacks by myself, driving or at home alone....maybe I'm wrong.Hang in there.


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

Linda, you have made a lot of progress and that is a fact.







I have an occasional panic attack although not very often but they surprize you and make you feel shakey. You'll get your balance back, like an ibs attack it may take your body adjusting back.Sometimes chemicals in the body flow the way they want to.Ask the guy back out for sure, Norb's advise in a comfortable surrounding is good. This could be the start of a wonderful relationship, but it won't blossom if you don't water it.







He sounds understanding put him to the test.







This is a good opportunity for you as well.


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## AZmom1 (Dec 6, 1999)

I had panic attacks for years. Once in a while I get the feeling of one coming on, but I've learned to recognize the signs and talk myself out of it. Tell me about your attack. How long did it last? Where were you? What were your symptoms? You must learn to not be afraid of the panic attacks. Learn that they cannot harm you. You know that because you did survive, in fact this guy does not like you less because of it.A couple of tips: Avoid caffeine, practice relaxation techniques, recognize when you're under stress and do something about it, exercise regularly, and know that no matter how scary it is during an attack, you will survive.AZ


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## shyra22f (May 9, 2000)

Hey Linda,I just saw this now and I'm so sorry this happened to you







I know first hand how frustrating and upsetting it is to feel like you've made progress and then experience what you feel is a major setback. All I can say is that when it comes to anxiety, it's 2 steps forward and 1 step back. I realize you're going through a rough time and have issues to sort out but like Norb said, why punish yourself and this guy because of it? Perhaps he _is_ coming on a bit strong but obviously the guy has a big heart to want to continue seeing you. You don't have to go this alone. Despite my boyfriend and I having problems right now, he had a major influence on my "recovery". Having a companion to help me through, support me, and make me feel accepted and loved unconditionally really kept me going and kept me wanting to try harder and really believe that one day I would be better.You need to figure out what brought on this attack. What were you thinking? Were you somewhere that made you feel uncomfortable? What were you guys talking about at that moment? As you know it's so important to figure that out and gain that knowledge to prevent it from happening again (catch those thoughts/feelings early). And keep in mind what Eric said, you've made _a lot_ of progress and don't ever forget that!! Please Linda, if you need to talk you have my email.Take Care


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## linda2001 (Apr 14, 2001)

Thanks everyone for your comments and advice and reminding me that having a panic attack is not the end of the world! I thought that after not having one for so long that I wouldn't have to go thru one again. I now realise that this is part of my life and may suffer from them every so often. I have done a lot of thinking over the past few days, and having talked to this guy I'm not ready for a relationship yet, for my own personal reasons but we will continue to see each other as friends. Which i am happy about as my initial reaction was to shut him out as I have shut everyone one out from getting close to me but after reading your replies I know I can't keep doing this, or i will be that lonely 70 year old!Thanks so much everyone again for helping me put one foot forward


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