# Hiatus hernia && me



## Lorrenfin (Apr 12, 2020)

Hi Im 25 
And dyslexic so very sorry for grammar x

2019 July

I was living in Greece, working.
When one night I just couldnt stop throwing up 
This leading to the worse weeks of my life 
Which really has never ended

The heart burn, throat pain, rashes on my neck where unbearable
Chest pains, no sleep 
I believed I would go to sleep and never wake up again
Id never had anxiety before but I was riddled with it 
I never could sleep 
I would go to see doctors and they thought it was my heart 
Weeks of hospital, doctors app 
Xrays

Different meds nothing was working

Nothing. no one could work it out 
I was on nexium 2 weeks no luck 
omeprazole lansoprazole
Nothing worked 
I payed 150 for the camera down my throat

They said it was helicobacter pylori 
Took the course of tablets 
STill no luck

So I came home as the pain was getting to much 
I cut out alcohol 
I was eatting only water melon and spinach
I lost so much weight 
(At first)

Back to UK went to Doctors 
was no help at all

Just told me to double up on PPI 
Even tho at this point Id been taking 2 a day for months 
Said you want pizza eat pizza?!!!!!!

Tomato, spicy, garlic , onions , cheese, bread 
Lemon , oranges, anything citrus, chocolate , mint coffee tea 
All cut from my diet months ago!! As they cause me so much pain 
As a vegetarian eatting is soooooo hard Im surprised I havent lost friends yet 
Its so hard to explain to people when you dont know yourself 
When to this doctor like 8 times Begging for gastroscopy

UK January they finally gave me gastroscopy 
(4 months after I came back from Greece!!) 
Finally Im told I have a Hiatal hernia
I ask hospital staff 
What happens next 
They say go to your doctor for ppi 
??????? 
Been on ppi for 7 months at this point which cant be good for me!

Doctors still no help 
I move doctors
Blood tests fine 
ECG heart fine 
Check for coeliac - negative

And Im put on esomeprazole and mebeverine ??? 
Ibs never came into play but she said it may help

Yep you guessed it Still no relief

The only way to describe it is imagine 10 months ago someone held your hand and NEVER let go

I havent had a second without heartburn 
Not a second without my throat burning 
This is the truth
Yes some days its pain level 5 and others days level 10 
But its still always there 
I had a hospital app coming up (April 24th)
but that has been cancelled now due to the virus 
Which is fine of course

But thats why Im on here & I need help 
Doctors is close also

Im 25

I feel like my life is over 
Sometime I dont even want to wake up in the morning 
I cant imagine this is my life now 
I feel like I will never meet a partner as they will never understand

Before this I loved spicy food, tomatos 
Drinking ( now and again) 
Being able to wear a bra!!!!! 
Being able to see friends and order food and drinking without being anxious and crying because there is nothing for me to eat 
Arguing with family more as the hernia and the acid reflux has taken over

You wouldnt think eating and drinking would take over your life but it has 
I dont even know what to do for work as the pain get worse just by sitting up right

I have cut out so much 
I only drink water

Every website says diet helps 
How in 10 months Im i having no relief???? 
I exercise 
I eat well 
My bed is lifted

Im a size 12-14 
12 stone ish (last time I went doctors) 
As websites said to lose weight
Which Im trying

I eat 3 meals a day 
But the last month I just have no appetite
I had a rice cake this morning at 11 
And still I have no appetite as t nearly 6pm 
Im bloating so much yet I only eat fruit veggies and the rice cakes 
Feel like Im putting on weight?? 
I started mebeverine a month ago 
Can this be related???

Just want this to go away I know it never will

But knowing I will never be me again and back to my old self 
Breaks my heart


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