# IBS controlling life



## AllStrZ (May 6, 2006)

I'm just curious if anyone is in a similar situation as me.I'm a male, 17 years old about to be 18 in a week and ever since I was diagnosed with IBS since 13, I am stranded to staying in a 4 block radius of my house. I've been on homeschooling since 16 and will finish home high school in 2 weeks. Most people of my age are driving around, going to parties (<~things that I want to do), while I'm stuck doing the same repetitive thing every week. I have no clue what I'm doing for college or work-wise, which seems like a bad idea already considering I can't stay somewhere I'm not comfortable at. Anyone in the same situation as me or have any suggestions? Thanks


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## 14013 (Nov 12, 2005)

i know exactly how you feel, trust me, i have had such bad times i have just sat and cried my heart out because i felth like i was never going to achieve anything, that i would never ever have a life and be like everyone else, and i do still have that problem but im working on it by trying to control my IBS, i go through stages where i just dont leave the house, where i dont go places with my friends and miss out on experiances because i was scared, and that scared feeling would ultimately lead to the inevitable anyway, so its a vicious circle! but i think its mind over matter as my parents say annoyingly - i know this but its hard! i find if i just throw myself into things, like i have to travel on the train alot, and i purely wouldnt like to use the toilets on the train eithe rbut because they are so manky and they are near peoples seats so yeah - nice smell! lol. but i find if i take my ipod with me and switch my mind off, usually by day dreaming i get through it fine, it doesnt always help if im particularly anxious but the majority of the time its good, its hard to know what to suggest because if youre having a bad patch you know there is just nothing that will help until you get over that edge where its just so bad you cant go anywhere, but when youre having a good period and you stat thowing yourself out there more, you gain in confidence and the bad times become less because usually you would be worried, but because in the good times you pushed yourself it means the times that usually would have been bad you had that extra confidence so you dont even think about it...lol im trying to make sense here!


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## MyOwnSavior (Dec 21, 2006)

AllStrZ said:


> I'm just curious if anyone is in a similar situation as me.I'm a male, 17 years old about to be 18 in a week and ever since I was diagnosed with IBS since 13, I am stranded to staying in a 4 block radius of my house. I've been on homeschooling since 16 and will finish home high school in 2 weeks. Most people of my age are driving around, going to parties (<~things that I want to do), while I'm stuck doing the same repetitive thing every week. I have no clue what I'm doing for college or work-wise, which seems like a bad idea already considering I can't stay somewhere I'm not comfortable at. Anyone in the same situation as me or have any suggestions? Thanks


I'm in the same situation as you, but unfortunately, I can't really offer any good suggestions on how to deal with your situation. I can only say that, having just graduated from college (only one summer class at present I am taking yet) IBS can, obviously, really effect your experience there. Let me say first that my first year in college I didn't know I "had" IBS. I just had this horrible pain that isolated me from everyone and everything dealing with campus life. Eventually I got sick of living on campus, and paying the extra money for nothing (no friends, no parties, no fun) so I moved back home (luckily my house was relatively close to campus). My problem is that I'll look back on situations like that, and wish that I had participated in more things. I think, you know, maybe if I had just put myself out there, and had more fun, I wouldn't have felt so stressed (which, according to all the "experts" is what can aggravate IBS symptoms), and would have been able to deal with the whole college scene better. Then again, it might not have. In any event, I would just say that, although you say you can't stay somewhere that you are comfortable at, I would say that that is true, but there are also varying degrees of discomfort. For example, it's probably not a great idea to uproot yourself and move somewhere where you don't know anyone, don't know the area, and so on. I would just say to try to take your next step in life - whether that is college or the workplace - very gradually, if you can. If you have a smooth transition, I think you should be able to at least tolerate the effects that come with it (i.e. again, if stress aggravates your IBS symptoms...) I know that I tried to live on campus my first year; I tried to cut myself completely off from my parents, from my area, and so on. Naturally I was not comfortable doing this, and hence I had such a horrible experience with that that it affected my attitude towards college for the rest of my time there...


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## Nikki (Jul 11, 2000)

I posted this in my blog earlier today.Another thing I have discovered about having IBS, is that is makes work, study, or just everyday socialising a difficult and time consuming task. There is nothing, and I mean nothing, that has made this any easier for me to deal with. That is, other than my own sheer willpower, effort and motivation. Currently, I am working as a healthcare assistant (nurse auxilliary if you prefer), prior to beginning my actual, real nurse training. I work shifts. Some of my shifts are long (12.5 hours) and some are shorter (around 8 hours). Some begin at 7am and some at 12pm. Then there is the dreaded "night shift". Night shifts are always 12.5 hours long, and always unpredictable.The night shift is something I never thought I would be able to manage. However, I've done it. What is more, is that I came out of it the other side in one piece.It doesn't matter that for early shifts I get up at 4.45am instead of 5.30am to get to work to make sure my tummy won't mess up. It doesn't matter that my sleep suffers during night shifts so that I can, again, sort my tummy out. I am doing a job that I love, and even though there are times when i am in pain, depressed, feeling sick or running to the toilet- it doesn't seem so bad because it is something that I really want to do. I wouldn't change it for the world.So to anyone who thinks they'll never be able to do it- you're wrong. Keep your chins up all!


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## maritin (May 31, 2007)

WOW, really interesting topic, i see


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## Dandaman (Jun 1, 2007)

yea im about to turn 19. it was a pain just to get through high school and graduate, it wasnt that bad up until senior year , but it did kind of cripple my social life. i couldnt really go out much and party or anything unless i was having a real good day. i felt unmotivated even to go out because the constant fear of if you do go out will your stomach be upset and it is just so uncomfortable if it does. hard to get and also maintain a girlfriend also with it lol.. right now ive been out of school for a year and really havent done much, half because of IBS and half just other issues. really adds to my depression having ibs, and my parents or anyone else for that matter not understanding and just thinking im lazy doesnt help either


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## Tamgirl21 (Sep 2, 2001)

Hey there...I was you at your age. Could never leave the house and too afraid to go to college. I'm 27 now and trust me, if you continue to let IBS control your life, you will wake up one day and be 30 and wonder where all the time went. It is so depressing. My best advice for you is to maybe see a therapist. It helped me tons and gave me some great tools on how to cope with my IBS and anxiety. I was able to even go away on vacation last yr, something I would have never done w/out the help. Have you seen a gastro at all? I am IBS C/D and have had some success with Pamine, an antispasmadic. In no way has it cured me, but it has given me somewhat of my life back. I just went back to college after 5 years and trust me, it's harder when your older to go back to college than it is when you are 17/18. It's going to be a battle but you can get through it. Get your tummy and your mind on track and you can do anything. Best of luck to you and you are not alone.







-Tammy


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## sucky (May 18, 2007)

I know how you feel, and it sucks! Unfortunately, i don't have too much advice to give you. I went from no symptoms at all, to ibs-d overnight right before my second year in college, and now with 5 classes left to graduation i am at a stand still. When ibs started to control my life a lot, i refused to accpet it and kept with my schedule of four classes a semester all year long (yet to take a summer off!) while also working 30 hours a week. While that has allowed me to have fun with the extra money and finish my degree a year early, it has also completely destroyed me physically and emotionally. Needless to say, I don;t know how i'm going to make it through these last few classes to enjoy the fruits of my labour. I can definately relate to the family not understanding. In addition to ibs, i have also started having what i believe to be small panic attacks any time i'm in a car (which is everyday with family as my mom and grandpa rely on me to drive them around). COmming from a different culture, my family freaks me out even more by either saying i'm making it up/can control it or telling me to hide it so no one finds out that there is something wrong with me (which would cause undo stress to THEM). Bottom line, i am very quickly realizing that as someone so young suffering from such a potentially debilitating problem you kind of have to say to hell with what everyone else wants from you and expects from you. You're young, you have all the time in the world to figure out how ibs will fit into your life, and not how you will manage to survive with ibs. Take your time, do it on your own terms. Don't push yourself too hard, and remember....everything you accomplish in life, however small or difficult, you did it in spite of an issue that most people can't even wrap their heads around. All of us should be proud of ourselves for having the courage to try to live normal lives or even to admit that we have this obstacle everyday. Today is a good day for me, maybe tomorrow won't be, but today is and thats good enough for me. I wish you all the luck and strength in dealing with an already uncertain time in your life without this issue.


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## scarlet (Jun 12, 2007)

AllStrZ said:


> I'm just curious if anyone is in a similar situation as me.I'm a male, 17 years old about to be 18 in a week and ever since I was diagnosed with IBS since 13, I am stranded to staying in a 4 block radius of my house. I've been on homeschooling since 16 and will finish home high school in 2 weeks. Most people of my age are driving around, going to parties (<~things that I want to do), while I'm stuck doing the same repetitive thing every week. I have no clue what I'm doing for college or work-wise, which seems like a bad idea already considering I can't stay somewhere I'm not comfortable at. Anyone in the same situation as me or have any suggestions? Thanks


i am 26 and dont worry am the same as u have been with ibs for years bcause i had a eating disorder i no thinks can be hard bcause i live with it bad to try to eat thing you no will not up set your tummy ok send me a post


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## fkm (Jun 13, 2007)

Hey, 2nd post! I'm a medical student (28) who's also had to endure IBS for quite a while! The change in behaviour is 'normal' enough as a result of IBS and is related to its severity. I'm in the same boat. However, as has been outlined, it's important not to let it run your life. Being afraid to leave the house emphasises that things are getting out of control. Don't get me wrong, when things are going bad stomach wise, it seems a folly to want to put yourself in a situation where your already fragile confidence could take another battering. However, what can be done about it?There are two ways of looking at it: 1. Control of symptoms.2. Reducing the psychological fear.The two of these are interlinked. Both influence the other. And therefore it goes that you should focus on both. For the 1st, diet, stress/exercise and pharmacoligical options could be considered in that order. For the 2nd, consider hypnotherapy or CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy). I'd really recommend the latter since this aims to focus on positive behaviour modification. Like all IBS sufferers and as I'm sure you already do, maybe also consider toilet locations where you're going in the event of an attack.


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## AllStrZ (May 6, 2006)

Well, thanks for all the feedback guys. I've been 18 for almost 2 weeks now, stuff hasn't changed. I try to push myself to go out, but things just don't work out the way I want it. I don't know whats next. I'm trying to get anxiety medication hopefully that does some good.


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