# What do I do when I am in the car and I need to GO



## Joanne1

Hiya,Does anyone have any good relaxiation techniques I can use when I am in the car, there is no toilet in sight and I need to go NOW.Yesterday I got caught in a traffic jam and started to panic as I needed to go. The anxiety makes the need to go worse and I sweat, start to shake and the pain is incredible. I managed to sit tight for about 30minutes and made it to the fast-food place (its not the first time I have stopped there and not bought anything). This is completly anxiety related- I know if I could calm down I would be ok! Any tips from people who have been in the same situation?Thanks


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## Emmab2003

I would like to hear some answers too.It sure is a horrible feeling, isnt it?


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## yankeesfan4eva

I'm afraid I don't really have any advice for you guys but, I definitly sypathize with you. I get myself so worked up that I end up giving myself D. Perhaps some anxiety meds? I'm going to my dr. next week to get on some cause I'm sick of living with anxiety. I hear xanax is good.


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## sarahfl

This actually just happened to me today! I find that when I'm in that situation, I sip on water, start tapping my fingers and just generally get frustrated that traffic isn't moving. For some reason, the water sipping and finger-tapping calm me down. You kind of just have to reassure yourself that the worst thing that could happen is you have an "accident" and if you're in the car by yourself, it's not that big of a deal unless you are not going home. The chances of an accident are not big though, so just some calming breathing helps.Sorry that's not much help, but that's what works for me!


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## Emmab2003

Usually things like that do help. One day though, my hubby decided to pull into the bank driveup. Naturally, there was a line and then a long delay and then he had to send everything back through and ask a question. I had a small attack, and he got mad at me for acting weird. I had to try to explain what happened, and I was just really nervous.If nothing else, it helps to have people here who are exactly the same way because you often think you are the only one.


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## sarahfl

That is the worst, when you feel like whoever you are with does not understand the urgency of the situation. When you really have to go, nothing can go fast enough; all stoplights you come to are red, the car in front of you is going slow, if you're not driving, whoever is driving is going too slow, etc. It's a really bad situation!


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## Linay

I have carried reusable ice cubes, and when I get anxious I rub them on my head, back of neck etc. I think the cold some how snaps me out of it a little. I keep them in a small cooler so they do not melt.Linda B


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## Emmab2003

And with my luck if I am in a bank or grocery line, someone in front of me has a huge problem. Their debit card wont go through, they dont have an item with a price on it, so they call for a price check etc etc.


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## Reena

I do deep breathing with counting. I can't think about the ibs if I am thinking about numbers. I keep it simple. I consciously relax my muscles. At one point I had a large size coffee can with a lid and a roll of tissue in it kept in my car in case of emergency. I never had to use it. But it was there just in case. I guess if I had to I could pull off the side of the road and go in the can...lol. I guess I would need privace glass too...lol. Just thinking about it makes me laugh. Although it sure isnt funny when you are sitting there stuck in traffic holding it in. Buy a relaxation tape that you can play in the car but one that doesnt knock you out.Reena


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## Guest

Oh Joanne - been there, got the t-shirt. I used to have to take my 2 oldest kids a 44 round trip journey to their school (on split sites, just to complicate matters!!) and whenever I got to Jack (my son's school) and stopped there, sounds crazy but it was on a slight incline and something about waiting there did something to my bowels and I was always desperate!! Luckily there is a Sainsbugs nearby so I could dive in there. I don't have a magic solution, desperately trying to take my mind off it partly did the trick (where would we be without Terry Wogan [ sorry, I'm an old bag of 42])!!All the bestSue, Manchester


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## Runningjude

I'm a younger old bag at 34 and I too listen Terry - rather loud if it's a bad morning - if the news is on I have to sing something stupid like "zipadeydudah". I also use backs rescue remedy and have been known to swig down a mouthful - instead of the usual 4 drops







I def feel worse when I perseve traffic to be busy, and i'm stuck on the school run.It could be worse - I used to have to walk everywhere and there are no toilets at all the route we have to go


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## 20248

What helped me with this was actually experiencing the dreaded situation of not being able to wait and realising it wasn't as awful as I thought. Obviously a bit easier to cope with when you're in the car on your own though!A plastic bag at hand to slide underneath you to protect your poor seat, a long coat or something for the quick dash from the car to the house/fast food toilet and a change of clothes in the car really do wonders for setting your mind at ease a bit. I actually find telling myself "if the worst happens it doesn't matter" has made me relax and be able to regain control until I make it to a bathroom.


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## 13318

I have this problem all the time too. My job takes me to different places every week and generaly I won't know the areas.I've jumped over walls into fields before, or pulled up on the motorway and ran up the banking behind the bushes.Pubs are a godsend when driving through little towns etc, as are fast food places.The one thing that makes me worse than anything are road works - especially when they force you onto the other carriage way in single file and there is nowhere to stop!Deep breathing and turning the radio on loud helps. Also I find that putting the heat up high calms me down a bit (confort-zone maybe?)


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## lxdreamerxl

Wow. There really is nothing worse than being stuck in traffic when you have got to go. I usually find songs that I know and I sing along to them and that can relax me sometimes - I just try to put my whole concentration on that song.I always try to tell myself that I'm in control - I'm using the hypnotherapy tapes now and I'm hoping they will help - they seem to help me calm down a little so far. But, even before using them I always just tried to tell myself that I could never totally loose control - that if I had to jump out of the car and run to some place with a bathroom I could, or I could drive through grass/yards if nesscary...I mean, I'd just tell myself anything to get through the situation.Also, it helps me a lot if I am the one driving. I mean, it's different if I'm sitting in the same spot and not moving for a while but as long as I am the one driving, I am concentrating on the road and not so much on my stomach. (Ironically, I still hate to drive, even though it helps.)So, I pretty much avoid cartrips if I can. Especially if I don't know where any bathrooms are. I guess that's kind of like letting the IBS win, but I just can't help it, it's too hard to deal with.Oh, I'm not as bad at this now, but I always used to take a hoodie or some extra peice of clothing with me wherever I went in case I didn't make it, so I could wrap it around my waist if I needed to...which I never did, but it made me feel a little better about the whole situation.


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## Jeanne D

I have always found that being "prepared" has helped to ease my anxiety while traveling.I always have a plastic trash bag that I can sit on in the event of an accident. On long trips I bring a change of clothes, wet wipes and my peppermint altoids.I have NEVER had an accident yet, but just knowing that I have these things available eases the stress of being stuck in my vehicle and unable to get to a bathroom.Jeanne


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## jeanne2

You know, you can use those plastic bags for little toilets too...if you have time and room in your car.YOu can buy these things called "wag bags" that are a little all in one kit...big bag with powdery stuff that soaks up liquid, a wipe---like one would do it..lol...and the disposalbag with a zip lock top.(They all come in the zip lock one)When I take trips and am feeling not real "steady" before I go...I put the passenger seat all the way up..and have room behind it if need be.Only done it a very few times in the 18 years I've had this...but again, it is reassuring, and if you can arrange to "go" in a bag-it sure saves your clothes!p.s. I avoid car travel with anybody but my family and a few close friends...it's just not worth it to me...but I drive a lot by myself and don't worry much about thingsOh- the place I found the wagbags was from Camp-Mor...it's a camping outlet catalog. I posted on another BB about themJeanne


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## Jeanne D

Thanks for the info on those bags, Jeanne. I have never heard of them, but they're certainly worth checking into.Jeanne


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## Wmtand

Wow, glad I am not alone. I drive 120 km one way to work on major highway and know every bathroom and bush enroute. That said, traffic often makes it impossible to get to quickly and that is when the anxiety starts. My coping methods over the 20+ years I have been doing it:- When traffic starts to get heavy, move to the lane closest to the shoulder. You feel more in control and less trapped. - Deep breathing with counts is an excellent exercise.- Drive alone whenever you can (or with understanding people) I could carpool but choose not to.- Always carry Kleenex with you (less obvious than toilet paper) and a plastic bag.- Opening the front and back passenger doors (when parked) offers some privacy if really needed. - Practise mind games with the time. eg: I know I can wait for 15 minutes because if I was in a store and had to leave thats how long it would take to get home, or You know you can last until the next commercial in a good movie. - I always have immodium in my pocket and don't hesitate to take one if I feel bad cramps. They usually subside some what within 20 minutes. And finally try some humour,, I have often 'in my mind' designed the perfect IBS car !! Seat flips up to provide access to a toilet with a holding tank beside the muffler which cooks the poop and turns it to dust. Did I mention the dark tinted "on demand" windows or the finger washbasin and soap dispenser in place of ash tray and lighter, toilet tissue holder in the console. Then of course there would be the cone of silence for the times you are travelling with others !!. - - I know it is not funny but that is how I cope and you have to admit there are endless possibilities for our comfort.. Could be a big seller for the first Car Maker that gets onboard.


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## 16328

I started taking Ativan before long car trips. I only take them then because they can be addictive and I have a prescription from my Doctor. Its helped me soo much. I'm sick of trying to cope all the time. They relax me enough and don't space me out. I can sit and stare out the window and daydream like I used to. I also am prepared with plastic bags, toilet paper, wipes and a change of close but luckily, I"ve never had to use them.


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## jazzynala

I have been there too!! I have actually used the trash bag before with my boyfriend driving. I had a Jeep Grand Cherokee and I jumped over the passenger seat and wedged myself down behind it. I had liquid D and the bag was a Godsend!! Except for I am not so slick as I thought and my elbow got caught on the window button and the window rolled down on me, but luckily the window only rolls down halfway and they were pretty tinted. We still have a laugh about that one to this day. I do not go anywhere without my trash bag, Dollar store baby wipes, and a change of clothes. Sometimes Tom gets mad at me because I would rather go in a bag or try to wait until I get home when I have an attack when we are out, but I think that that mostly comes from the associated panic I usually get, my first instinct is always to run for comfort. Or maybe I am just crazy??


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## lxdreamerxl

Jazzynala, that makes sense to me, to have to be in your comfort zone. For me, my comfort zone is a bathroom - any bathroom, and even if I'm sick but don't have to go to the bathroom right away, I have to get to a bathroom just to stop the panic attack because they are my only safe place (besides my house.)Wmtand, the thing about the IBS car made me laugh. I seriously wish there was a car like that, I'd travel all the time!! I've actually been considering contacting my state rep. because I've read on the messageboards that some states are trying to enforce a law where bathrooms have to be available in public facilities for people with IBS, Chrons, etc. I've had that happen too many times where I finally make it off the road to a gas station and they don't have restrooms there.


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## 16656

the movie Two Weeks Notice with Sandra Bullock spoke to IBS sufferers when it showed her in a traffice jam with Hugh Grant in the car, and she'd just eaten like 3 chili dogs at a fair and her stomach is making insane noises and she's wiggling around noticing they'd be in traffice for miles. Hugh of course ditches the car in traffic and carries her over his shoulder to someones RV and pays them to use the bathroom, My husband on the other hand, just gets annoyed and says "what the Heck am I supposed to do?"


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## 14139

Boy can I relate to this post. It happens to me so often that I don't like to leave home. Every car ride is the same thing. I could sit on the toilet for an hour before leaving home trying desperately to go-but can't. I get in the car go a couple of miles and have to go. I know it is my nerves. There are very few things to comfort me. They are: always driving, know where every bathroom is, and at the very worst when I really have to go I put my hand on my stomach while I am driving and it somehow helps. I know if I can get past the car problem I will have conquered this. I have had 2 accidents in my life. Neither one in the car, but I was driving when the urge came on and just didn't make it to a bathroom in time. The most devastating time in my life!!!!! I am still not over it. In fact I believe that is why I am so bad today. I don't know what will happen to me if it happens again. I have taken anti-anxiety for years-it still happens. IBS is a mind game. The stronger you are mentally about it the better it is. If you have ways of coping in bad situations and it works then you are a winner. If anyone comes up with something that works let us know.


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## Joanne1

Hi everyone,Thanks so much for the advise. Since these attacks always happen to me in the morning I am pretty much always alone in the car to work. I have been trying the following and it seems to work:1. Deep breathing, in forfor 5 hold for five out for five.2. telling myself that if I was still in bed, that is if I had decided to have a lie in, I wouldn't need to go to the toilet right now!3. Loud music I can sing along to4. I read on another post that tight trousers/skirt makes IBS worse (someone actaully said "drawstring pants saved my life"). I'm not entirely convinced this is true but jjust in case when I get in the car I undo the buttons on my trousers. It actually seems to help quite a lot but it might be a placebo effect- who cares so long as it works. Th only drawback here is that one day I might forget to do them up again before I get out the car and someone might see me in the carpark with my trousers round my ankles!I also tried not eating any breakfast (with the intention of having somehting once I got to work). THis didn't seem to make any difference, I just ended up starving! I have also started leaving later for work so that I miss the traffic and the journey is shorter. So I usually arrive about 10mins late! No one minds.This is just for everyday short trips. Longer trips cause more anxiety especially if we have to leave first thing in the morning. The other week my friend picked me up at 7.30am!! Luckily the panic had already sent me to the toilet by then and I took a precautionary imodium just before she picked me up. I didn't ahve to go the whole 3 hour trip!Its funny the things that make you proud of yourself!


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## 17182

I have anxiety induced D and taking Buspar a mild sedative has given me my lifeback. I suffered unnessasarily for years. The only thing that helps me is Buspar a non droswy mild seditive and Donatal a antispasmotic. I was so close to a D attack once that I pulled out my umbrella to sit on if I did not make it home. Now on my medications I go out and don't even think about where a bathroom is.


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## 21438

I've noticed that the last few times I've been in a car I've been feeling sick, dizzy and crampy, the last time I had what i think was a minor anxiety attack. It's bee a week now and I'm still a bit shaken from it! I don't drive and am rarely in a car, but I feel sick now just thinking about it! The biggest accident I've ever had was walking home and having to go in a laneway beside my old school (with my then boyfriend at my side), I was in tears for the whole weekend!


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## cookies4marilyn

You guys have some great suggestions - especially that car - potty seat -hmm, why not suggest it to an auto manufacturer!I remember that scene in Two Weeks Notice - I thought to myself that is what IBSers feel like all the time. I even wrote an article one time referring to that scene (and others in movies) on how all potty scenes are so hilarious - but it's part of our everyday IBS agony.Back in 1993, I had to drive to the Mayo Clinic to get my dx of IBS verified - I didn't want to take public transportation, because I felt more in control to drive the 7 hours- so I brought a large coffee can lined in a baggie. My friend Mary drove with me to make sure I'd be OK. When my husband (now ex) saw the can he asked me what it was for - I told him just in case I got stuck in traffic and I couldn't get to a bathroom. His comment - "Poor Mary." (Implying the burden of her having to witness me pooping in her presence - NOT my pain or my embarrassment! Ackkk!)







Many times back then, I had the sweats and broke speed limits to get to the can in time!Thankfully, I have broken the strong bond of having attacks and worrying about bathrooms for the most part - the mind-gut anxiety connection - and I was about house-bound! Now I am able to control the rumblings if I get any, within seconds - I had IBS since 1983, and was on every medication there was, even not eating, etc. I used the clincial hypnotherapy program that Gracefully mentioned (IBS Audio Program) - it took me a long time - most likely, I am probably the one who took the most time to get better on the program! Most people felt better way sooner than I did, because I had so many anxiety issues and stressors going on. But if I made it, I bet some of you could too.Take a peek at this thread:http://ibsgroup.org/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/43110261/m/471103451maybe it will help ya a bit - if you have any questions, let me know. Most of the folks who have been helped by the program since I came to this BB in 2000 have now left because IBS is no longer a part of their lives. Take care.


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## 21918

When my husband and I go anywhere in the car, I panic and need to stop about 5 minutes into the trip. It doesn't matter how many times I go before we leave. For some reason, the worst time for me is when he has to drop one vehicle off for service and I follow in another vehicle. One morning I was going to pick him up from leaving a vehicle for service, and I couldn't find a restroom in time. (It didn't help that I had Chinese food the night before.)Now I live in dread of having vehicles serviced.One trick I use (suggested by my husband) is to go out and sit in the car for 5-10 minutes before leaving. Usually this causes me to go back in the house and use the bathroom before we leave and relieves a lot of my anxiety.One thing that really helps is to bring your toilet with you. We bought a motorhome, and it's so great to know I can go anytime or place.I've been dealing with ibs since the late '60s and I think it's about time I get more control over this whole situation. I use nortriptyline, xanax, imodium, Levsin SL, Caltrate, and I've just started Questran. I ordered the hypnosis CDs Monday and they should be arriving anyday now. I have tried hypnosis in the past for weight loss (I lost 17 pounds, but when I stopped using the tapes, I gained the weight back.) Oddly, it's these tapes that have helped somewhat with the ibs. Sometimes I use the breathing and relaxation I learned when I feel most anxious. I really hope these CDs will help before I have to fly across the country next month.


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## Larry

Hi all, how nice it is to hear all these issues. I feel I am not alone. I think I have used every toiet, forest, underpass, overpass you name it.I have missed the last to days work. I have issues every mornig before work and on the way. EVERYDAY. Usually once I make my one or two stops on the way and get to work I am fine. As for the rest of the day. Tell me this isn't in my head! If you have an accident on the way to work you are screwed, on the way home does it matter? Well it does but you can prevent embarrassment buy just driving home and cleanin up. Only once did I have an accident several ytrs. ago. And that is cause I was with someone and this person new I had to go and made me laugh. So cruel. SO if anyone thinks they have problems you are not alone. My doc. wants to put me on a new med. It is for woman only though and I am a man. Not sure what it is called but perhaps someone knows and can fill me in.


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## Guest

I agree with the invention for the IBS seat in the car. Its a great idea. I have been talking to my wife about an idea. I think it would be great to have an "IBS BUS". People with IBS would be able to ride in a bus equiped with toilets (2) so that getting to work would be a bonding experiance and easy on the bowels/brain. I too have memorized every spot along the road to every destination I travel. Its almost a game now, remembering, if I have time, which toilet is cleaner and/or close. I have to start driving in traffic again tomorrow so I just have to hope that I can handle it.


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## 13411

i am new to this but i am having a lot of the same symptoms. i have started to just stay at home all the time and this really bothers me because i am used to going wherever i wanted and not worry about this. i have noticed it is easier if i am driving. when i do anywhere i have to map outin my head where are all the places i can stop i if need to. if there isnt a place on the way i just want go. this is really making it hard on my socail life as well. i am becoming depressed. yes xanax does help. another thing is that you think people dont beleive you and you feel so stupid for being this way.. i dont get it..


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## kitkat17 Lady of the Loo

I have several times used my trash can in my van. Line it with a plastic bag. I pull down the shades I have on some windows and all my seats have towels on them put one on back window. I HATE THIS FEELING!!! I hate being in the car!!!


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## 13853

Sorry but you reminded me of my brother-in-law. He's not IBS but he's handicapped (no legs) and drives with hand controls. He was caught in a traffic jam and had to go so into the back of his van he went with a brown paper bag. There were 4 others in the van and he made his son "deposit" the bag at the next rest stop. It was disgusting at the time but we've laughed about this for years.


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## 14416

One of my worst experiences with having to use the bathroom didn't involve #2 but rather, #1.I had to use the restroom at the place I was leaving, but was like ahhh, I'll be home in 10 minutes, I can wait... Little did I know I would run into a traffic jam because of a major wreck. I didn't know what I was going to do.. I had to go soooo bad.. It was literally only 3 minutes to my house without the traffic jam, but this wasn't moving at all.. I decided to try and turn around and head to a gas station. To my luck, I pull into a small marathon that did not have a customer bathroom, heck I don't even know if there was one on the premises.... At that point I was thinking about going into a towel I had on my floor, but that would have caused a bigger mess, and I had just gotten the truck for crying out loud!After about 30 minutes of pain and agony I finally managed to get to a Dairy Queen. I will never feel the same way about Dairy Queen again. Everytime I think about the restaurant, a tear comes to my eyes, that place was my life saver







(haha)


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## 14988

I've done the same. It's embarrassing, but I've actually had to run into a cornfield when driving past the Dallas Ranch (remember the TV show Dallas?) Yes, I went, at the Dallas ranch. Had little prickly burrs stuck in my nice work pants (that's trousers for those in UK).


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## 14988

Dang, my new picture didn't work. I hate to use the samples. oh well.


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## 14988

There I am! Well, there's my dog. He helps calm my IBS.


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## 17297

I have just started to read this board today.....I am laughing so hard......because I can relate!I have been having irritable bowel for the last 11 years....mainly in the morning before I went to work or took the teenage daughters to school. Every story is my story....except having an accident. My fear has always been being stuck in traffic and not having access to a bathroom.I once made my husband pull over and rent a motel room because I felt like I needed to use the bathroom. It was all anxiety driven.....no bathrooms in sight and no place to pull over...near cliffs etc. That was the beginning of my anxiety and roadtrips are not on my agenda.I told my husband if he wanted me to go on any roadtrips....he better just buy a motorhome...class B will do. Then he started looking at class A motor homes in the 300K range....now we can't afford that! I also require two bathrooms if we plan on going to any hotel.Now how many of the women feel perimenopause is behind their IBS? I am 47 years old and I am thinking this hormone thing is behind a lot of my problems.....Anxiety......Stress....vicious cycles.Anyway.....love everyone's humor on this site.


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## 21918

Welcome rumter--







I actually did get my husband to buy a motor home so we don't have to worry so much where the next rest area is. It's one of the wide body Class A's. He usually likes me to help navigate when he's driving. Once I went back to use the toilet while he was driving to the coast. I started getting shook around pretty violently and wondered what was going on. When I came out, I found that he had taken a detour through a city park with speed bumps. I got to my seat in time to find out that we were stopped on a bridge (over a river) that had a weight limit of 4 tons. Our Rv weighs 9 tons.







Needless to say I usually stay up front to help navigate whenever we take a trip in it.







But it's still nice to know that I have a toilet with me when I need it.


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## 23282

What a site! My husband's first question this morning was: do you want to go down across the Border? Gas is cheaper in USA than Canada right now. I said: no way! I have just begun to recover from our last "jaunt". Then I came back to this site which I found last night and read him a whole lot of the clips. Well done!His suggestion: why don't a whole lot of you get together and design pants, jeans, underwear with backdoor zippers ...!However, we noticed during the week that a new indoor composting toilet is becoming popular (the Canadian Gov. General has one or two in her house) - seems to me a smaller version of that would be great as the biggest point I noticed was that there was no smell involved.A smaller version for the car or van would be perfect. It's called the Sun-Mar composting toilet. Cheers !Ladee


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## 14988

We are so funny. I think we'd all be so happy if we could just turn invisible at any moment and have an invisible port o potty show up. I went to a Beer festival in New York once & was looking around and saw so many port o potties. there were about 2 on every corner. I stopped, turned to my friend and said "This is my dream. Port o Potties on every corner. I'm in heaven". She laughed but it was true.


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## 21918

I posted this on another thread, but it seems really relevant here.The perfect vehicle.


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## Screamer

Hi everyone







LOL! I LOVE this thread. It's me, me, me! Well I haven't been unlucky enough to have an accident yet but I've sure had some close calls (like speeding home as fast as I can in order to dash into the loo leaving the kids to sit in the car and wonder what the heck mum is doing?!?). I love the idea of an IBS car! I told DH about it this morning and he just shook his head then cracked up. He reckons we should do it as so many of us suffer that we'd have to make a fortune off such a wonderful invention. Anyway, thanks for sharing guys. It's SO nice to know I'm not alone in this (just over the other side of the world, sigh).


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## 14416

I've come to the point where I really don't care if I have to "poop my pants" in my car. I would rather embarass myself in privacy than embarass myself in front of others.There have been SEVERAL close calls, yes... I have had to pull off the side of the road open the passenger door, and let it go in a field off the highway. Talk about fun... The thing I've come to realize though, is if we have to do something so extreme. People aren't going to think "oh that guy has IBS". They are more than likely thinking, "man, im glad that isn't me. (because i've been there before)" everyone gets diarrhea. we're just unlucky in how often we do.


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## 14780

Okay, it's the afternoon and I'm just a little punchy here at work, so let me suggest this...Get one of those hats with the fake hair and if you have to pull over put it on. Bam no one will recognize you. In all seriousness, screw what anyone thinks. I live in a small town by most standards and with the position my family is in, I know a whole lot of people. I don't honestly know if they would recognize me if I did have to pull of the side of the road in that sort of emergency. If they can't respect your situation, then they don't really deserve a whole lot of thought from you. Have you every read covey? Think of it this way - Our bowel movements are not in our circle of influence.


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## 14416

I like the disguise idea.Get some of those fake teeth, too!Put on the fake mustache, and those glasses with that fake nose.Hahaha


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## 14780

how about a big lei to put in the window to make your car look different?


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## Screamer

I like the disguise idea too







After being married for more than 4 years I have still yet to "fluff" in front of my DH (and I've known him for 8!) so the idea of having to pop my bum into a public place like a field to poop is literally my worst nightmare come true! Even when no one is home I go to obsessive extremes just to make sure no one hears me "go"


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## 14988

I have a pretty gassy family. My dad was big on "Pull my finger" & all that. My fiance & I let em rip and then look at each other like "What?" He doesn't have IBS but is a gasser. I feel better releasing it. With anyone else I'd feel like I was so gross, but with him it's kind of funny. We call each other gross but we really don't mean it. I did make the mistake of being so comfortable I let a loud one out one morning while he was at work. His parents were visiting and sleeping in the next room. I quickly thought "Oops! Do I blame it on the dogs?" I can't imagine living with my friend. She runs out "to get the mail" when she has to fart. I'd never be home!


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey Screamer,Im over the other side of the world too. Im an Aussie Perth girl







I have had so many close calls I cant even count. Sometimes they seem to come on for absolutley no reason. Here's one to share fro you all... one of my more embarrassing days.A week ago I was driving to rowing training with my friend in the car and I started to get these really bad tummy pains (in my head im thinking 'oh dear god no') the pains got worse and worse, I was begining to sweat and knew I was at the point of no return ..... that being I had to go to the toilet and I had to go NOW. I was like "ummmmmm Karen, I gotta go to the loo, feeling really sick here" (embarrassing) So im sitting there squirming and sweating cursing under my breath (you all know the feeling) and my friend gets a case of the giggles about my little situation (grrr lol). I was starting to worry I wasnt going to make it to the toilet in time and that I would have a little accident infront of my friend. Its amazing how fast you can drive in situations like this lol.I managed to make it to a service station in time (ONLY JUST), but alas... in my hast to go to the toliet I didnt realise there was no toilet paper.... I'll let you all use ur imaginations here as to how I solved that problem lol. After I walked out front the bathroom heading to my car (with my frined sitting in there waiting) feeling alot better but in a bit of a daze I managed to walk straight into the class doors. What a great start to the day lol.My friend has refused to let me live this one down, she thinks it is the funniest thing ever. Which now that I can reflect back it is kinda funny. Im really lucky to have friends who are really open and understanding. Everyone knows I have IBS and none of them care. But in answer to your original question 'what do u do if u gotta go'. I havent had an accident yet but there have been alot of close calls. I wonder if your body would let you have an accident?? All I do know is when the D feeling comes, I become a rally car driver in order to get to the nearest toilets HEHE


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## 15894

Damn, here I thought I was the only one who did this..I had times when I just pulled over at the side of the road, it got so bad!...People passing by probably thought I was a nut...But, when you gotta go, there's no stopping!!!..


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## 21973

before i leave the house, i drink my chamomile tea nad try to relax for an hour. i make myself "go" right there. when im in the car, i sing loud to distract myself. it works.


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## 19655

If you're in a line (drive up ATM) with husband or someone else driving, getting out and walking around is easy. "I'll meet you at the exit of the parking lot"I also learned to use "butt-robics" in the car during traffic. Clench your butt muscles to the music. Your passengers will think you're just going with the music and it distracts from the anxiety because you're concentrating on the exercise. It also works to keep you slim!Another great thing is heated seats. Heat definitely relaxes the gut. I just bought a new car and that was one of my top requirements when test driving. The ones that heat the lower back as well as the seat are best.If your car doesn't have them you can buy heated massage pads for cars at Wal-Mart, Target etc for around $30 or less.


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## 20422

That awful feeling is how I feel all of the time with leaky gas. At home with my boyfriend, in any social setting, I just have to hold it all in. All the time! Uncomfortable, painful. You probably don't want to hear that.. Sorry too I don't have any good advice, except for if you're from Scotland be sure to check out whether or not it's caused by Celiac disease or not if you haven't already.


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## Gret

Maybe it helps everyone just knowing that you are not alone with this feeling! How can so many people feel the same way? We're not alone.


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## 19765

Wow, it makes me feel good that i'm not the only one with the weird habits when in the panic mode of not being near a bathroom and having to go really bad. I have had ibs-d all my life(19 yrs) so I'm no stranger to the roadside stops. I have had to jump out of the car and into the bushes many times(leaf wipes don't bother me anymore)lol. I have pretty much been to every bathroom anywhere along my travels, gas stations,restaurants you name it i've been to their bathroom. I like to travel with extra clothes and a roll of toilet paper and a plastic bag(multiple reasons). I too do the butt flex thing and try to distract my mind from having to go in any way possible which is definately hard. Having a cell phone is also a comforting thing for in case of an emergency and you need to call someone for clothes or call into work if your stuck in the bathroom and carrying a backpack with the basics is always a comforting thing for me.


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## 21531

Finally I have found people who understand what I've been going through for 17 yrs.I can only ride in a car with another person even if I'm the one driving for a block or two.So I really don't ride with anybody at all. I have a van so a porta potty will fit nicely in the back. I also have the plastic trash bag too.Just in case.I hate stop lights and waiting for trains.I also have turned up the radio, counted, hummed silly songs my favorite is the theme from Star Trek. lolI've been like this for 17yrs and it doesn't look like it will ever stop.I have missed out on so much of my kid's lives. That's what I hate most about this.my youngest was 15 months old when I got IBS.I feel like I have no life.


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## 18275

Man, reading these postings makes me feel like I'm not crazy! I too can't handle traffic, construction detours, long lines, etc. Not just in the car but at the store, inside the bank, at amusment parks, movies, etc...I did try hypnosis, and the only thing I got out of it was tracing a STOP sign in my head. Close your eyes if you can, if not, just imagine the steering wheel as a stop sign. Start that the top and do all 8 sides (Octagon) and corners then work your way into the center of the sign and outline the word STOP. Do this over and over and sooner then you think, the line has moved or the traffic is moving. Sometimes I have to remind myself to do it and stop the panic attack. I love the idea of taking a change of clothes just in case. I think I'll be adding that to the mini-van. Good Luck everyone, I know we all struggle with this one!Gina


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## 18275

As for the "gas" topic that took over here. It's a huge joke in my family that I don't fart and I don't poo. Yes, everyone knows I have IBS, but nobody ever hears me.... I think I would just die if my husband or family heard me fart or take a poo.... My daughter says that when I die I'll weigh 600lbs because of all that poo left inside! It's a fun way to just make them wonder... do I or don't I???? Gina


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## 18646

I really relate to this!!! I have Severe IBS-D. I have had to go on the side of the road, in the snow, miles away from home, with a wetnap as a wipe. (my kids and I still laugh about that one and the steam rising from it) I have gone behind bushes, churches, cemetaries, (sorry) and anyplace and every place in between. I have had accidents while walking into stores only to have to walk back to my car in ebarrassment and shame. What I hate the most, is when you run (in urgency) into a place of business and ask if they have a bathroom they tell you no. How do their employees use the bathroom if they don't have one? We are all human and all have to go at some point or another. We, with IBS-D go more often and sometimes suddenly. I have kept a change of clothes in the car since 1990, I never thought of a can or plastic bag. I love the idea of the car made just for us...For years I have stayed home or as close to home as possible. I might try a road trip this weekend thanks to the humor I have just read and the helpful hints!!


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## 18031

I am so glad to have finally found you all. I have suffered with, lived with, coped with IBS-D for over 30 years. This morning, feeling great, no obvious anxiety, and whoosh! WITHOUT warning everything just released. THANK GOODNESS. I was home alone and able to step into the shower to clean up. Of course, then all the doubts begin: what if I'm somewhere else & this happens? in the car? in synagogue? dinner with friends? THEN I had a MAJOR anxiety attack. Anyway...I'm calmed down now & know I just need to move forward. What else can we do, right? I do want to give Joanne1 an answer to WHAT TO DO IF SHE'S IN THE CAR? for years I have used the same relaxation technique: Blue is my favorite color & I wear a blue sapphire ring. I slowly rub the surface of my ring, visualize ocean waves coming in (the anxiety of GOTTA GO NOW) and receding (relaxation-don't have to go) and I repeat the word BLUE to myself. I continue doing this until I calm down. So far (28 years) this has worked very well for me. I would suggest that Joanne1 find a word, a visualization that is meaningful to her & try it. Similar to self-hypnosis, I suppose.That said I also practice all the other techniques you all mentioned: rarely ride with anyone else except my very understanding hubby, if I have to be with a group I insist on driving, I keep to the right lane so I can exit quick.Sorry to be so wordy. I've never found others "like me". So good to be among people who understand the situation. Thanks!


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## 17497

Hey everyone,I'm new to this and glad to finally see that there are others like myself. Very funny things here and I guess humor helps a lot but only when you're not sitting on the toilet right now with sweat streaming down your face, clutching your stomach. In response to this, I thought being in a car was actually better because I live in NY and being stuck in the subway doesn't help ease the anxiety either. My IBS-D has slowly started taking over my life this year to the point that I don't and can't leave the apartment without trying to use the bathroom, not eating anything and downing 2-3 Immodiums just before leaving the apartment. Thank God I haven't had any accidents, but just close calls, close enough wait I actually did a few years ago. I couldn't hold it anymore and I pooped in my pants because the darn elevator in my apartment bldg. wouldn't come fast enough. Imagine being in a subway and having the urge to go. A few years ago they had the doors in between the cars unlocked but I think maybe also because of 9-11 they've permamently locked them so it isn't as though you can go in between, poop, hold on for dear life with one hand and wipe your rear with the other while the train is going how many miles per hour, not taking into account, the countless of people and homeless, peddlers going between cars who would have to walk over you while you're pooping. So now I stay home, prisoner of my own anxiety, fired from my latest job again for being out too often, broke and hoping there's some help out there.


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## 21985

tiki - I feel for you. I need to get a job and don't know how I am going to do that while on the toilet most of the day. Last week I was on my way to Massachusetts when I felt an urge to go waiting at the toll to go over the GW Bridge. I ended up with my first panic attack in over a decade (I am trying to wean off Paxil after 12 years and now have my IBS symptoms back) and ended up trapped in the Bronx for 2 days unable to get back into the car. (First at a Rite Aid for 2 hours using their bathroom, then at a hospital using theirs, finally at a hotel near Yankee Stadium and then after being medicated at an ER in NJ, I was able to ride in the car to get home.)It is remarkable how the panic part sets in and starts to control the entire cycle. I've yet to go in my pants, but have come close like most everyone else. I am going to look into meditation and hypnotherapy because I now realize that my mind is even more of a problem than my bowels. And I have a feeling these therapies might help both.


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## 22161

The way i deal with car journeys is:a) only travel at low traffic times, late at night.







Always carry my "**** kit", spare trousers in the boot, carrier bag under the seat, toilet roll in the glove box and an instant heat pad for a hot bottle in my bag and body spray!c) try to travel when there is someone else at home to pick me up if i break down (this is my major worry, cuz i wouldn't be able to get home)d) If i feel anxious about needing the loo, i tap the outside of my right hand (left for males) the part running down the outside of your little finger. This is an acupuncture point for panick attackse) tell myself "whats the worst that can happen? i go in the car where know one can see me and clean it up when i get home"d) put on 70's tunes and sing the loudest you can, this works well. dance too in your seat!I've found that all these things combined have helped me over the years, and touch wood, i haven't had an accident but come close. The closet i've come was been stuck behind an accident on the motorway in long traffic for 45 mins. Having a major panic attack i phone my mom (i think she thought i'd been in the accident!) tears streaming my face uncontrolably. I think the little girl in the next car must have thought, "who's that weird crying girl talking to while sitting on a carrier bag?!"I think we should start a petition for the "magic car" to be made!


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## 18031

those suggestions are excellent. I prefer not to have any more attacks but if I do I will certainly try the tap tap tapping on the accupuncture point.Awesome what we can learn from one another! Already my life is better just from finding this site. For example, I needed to be 100 miles away by 11am earlier this week. Normally I would have traveled the night before & been prepared for my morning appointment by already being so close. Instead, I used many of the techniques I've learned from this site, left my house at 9am(previously an unheard of time to leave quick access to the loo), traveled to my destination & had only 1 panic attack that I was able to breathe through. Success! What a rush that was.Thanks to everyone who is always willing to share their stories. So helpful.


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## millyimp

hello for me , it it always the anxiety and apprehension of .. what if I dont make it to a toilet in time .. or if I do there is someone in there and I cant get in .. then comes but if I am in there for quite a while and someone in waiting to use it .. that also produces further anxiety ... feeling embarrassed at being in so long and keeping someone else waiting .I have had IBS D for 17 years and only once had an accident where I just managed to open the door .. but not make it up the stairs .. like most of us , I have a list of toilets made out when I travel .. my ex Husband always made a list of where they were so that I knew, it was a help knowing that .I have never been on medication . When I am going out anywhere I take one Acidophilus ,they have been my friend since I began with IBS... but if I am travelling a long distance then I take one Acidophilus plus one Imodium.. that works for me ... I still have the apprehension up to a point ,thinking about poss holdups .. but I also do the relaxation etc we all talk about in here .. and also self talk .. telling myself my little friends (ACIDOPHILUS AND IMODIUM) have always worked for me and they will do it again this time . Maybe they may be of help to some others in here .It would be so lovely to be able to go out and have a meal without the worry of eating something that will trigger of an attack .. it is the fact that I can eat a meal one time .. no affects .. but have the same meal another time and it triggers an attack off.. does anyone else find this to be the case with them ? While on a weekend away last year I was out and ate a meal I have eaten many times before with no ill affect, this time I knew within 30 mins an attack was on the way .. I felt really awful as all I could do was apologise saying to the person I was with .. I am sorry but I have to get back ...the dissappointment was there to see ..making me feel so guilty at being the cause of that dissapointment .We just got back and I was really ill from 8PM that night till 3AM the following morning ...I sometimes think it would be helpful having a partner who also had IBS he /she would then be more able to relate, you would give each other support, and understanding too .Sorry to go on but this is the first time I too have been able to talk about it with others who fully understand how we feel when having an attack .. and why we are so often reluctant to go out .take care Milly


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## 21419

For me if I just look out the window and keep thinking I can stop and go in that field or in that bush, it helps me. I keep a camping toilet in my car which I have used quite often- it folds down flat and fold up quickly with a regular size seat to sit on- grocery bags fit on it great. So like others have said a bag, toilet, spare clothes. I just keep thinking to myself worse comes to worse you #### your pants, and turn around and drive home. Oh well that's what clean clothes and a shower are for right. I know, easier said than done-right? I can barely leave the house but when I do that's what I think. Having a toilet in my car is definitely a LIFESAVER!!!! I encourage everyone to get one


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## 18031

sounds like you have come to peace with this blasted syndrome. That's important, isn't it? I keep threatening to get a porta-toitie for the van -- you make it sound so do-able.


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## Nick65

I have just managed to travel across from England to the South of France with my Porta Potti in tow.It was ridiculosuly easy !!!! I did get a few panic attacks, but my Hynotherapy helped me and I used to sit there and think to myself - If I need to go it would take me 30 seconds to stop the car, pull over and open the toilet up - This effectively mean't that I was very happy and I could enjoy the holiday alot more. Try getting one - It will be the best money ever spent - OK if it means you cannot take other people with you then so what, but your family understand when they are in teh car with you. My wife and kids were with me and they know the probs i have. In actual fact my kids used the toilet more than me, as whenever we stopped at some service stations there were very long queues or there were the legendary holes in the floor at service stations and no one in their right mind would want to use one of them, even without IBS.


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## 14849

I get VERY nervous when traffic stops moving. As long as traffic IS moving I am normally alright....but the moment it stops....I panic.


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## Nick65

I tell you what. Keep your distance from the car in front (Maybe 10 yards) and then you feel like you have room to breath.


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## 16828

It is so nice to find so many people with the same problem. I've had to work my way through the anxiety of driving. I am better too when I am the driver. I've tried the extra clothing, toilet paper in car etc. I usually am ok unless there is a traffic backup..then panic may start up. In that case I usually turn the air conditioner on high and blow it directly at my face. This is what helps me best. I now have 2 in college and the drive to visit is 2 hours to see one and 3 hours to see the other. I have learn where the rest stops are for both trips. Sometimes knowing the itinerary helps too. Good luck!


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## 17473

I've only found this site yesterday and it has been enormously helpful to me! I can SO relate to all these posts! I do all kinds of things in the car to focus on making it to my destination--pray, count, turn on the radio and sing as loud as I can, do deep breathing exercises, etc. Sometimes I do not make it to work and I have to speed home. I used to be extremely humiliated by it and while I don't enjoy it now (lol) I more or less take it in stride. I've copied some of your suggestions and will put them to good use!


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## 22051

> quote:Originally posted by Arabella:What helped me with this was actually experiencing the dreaded situation of not being able to wait and realising it wasn't as awful as I thought. Obviously a bit easier to cope with when you're in the car on your own though!A plastic bag at hand to slide underneath you to protect your poor seat, a long coat or something for the quick dash from the car to the house/fast food toilet and a change of clothes in the car really do wonders for setting your mind at ease a bit. I actually find telling myself "if the worst happens it doesn't matter" has made me relax and be able to regain control until I make it to a bathroom.


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## 22051

dear arabella , i too suffer the same as you, and the anxiety it causes if you can,t find a toiolet wuick enough is unbearable. its a shame they cannot find a magic pill for us to take


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## 22051

to lisa b w i to sometimes speed up to work which is only 2 miles away and finf i have to make a u turn in the carpark. life really is hard sometimes. how do you manage to have a social life ? that is what i miss most. any suggestions?


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## 18031

I second that message on missing out on a social life. My situation has really restricted the friends I see and the time I spend out of the house. I find I am constantly making excuses for why I can't join them for a meal or a hike or a shopping trip. Social isolation then adds to my depression which then makes the tummy trouble worse. Oh I know I'm not telling you anything you all don't know -- thanks for letting me vent.Recently we moved & we haven't sold our other house so money is extremely scary. The stress has just about done me in. I try to stay strong, but sometimes I just want to give up and stay in bed all day. Soon I'll be looking for a job in our new town. Now that's scary too. My last job was 2 blocks from home, flexible & with all women. That was easy. Now I live in a large metro area so commuting becomes a problem.The researchers need to hurry & find a "cure" for us. Think of what awesome people we could be if we were allowed to unleash all our pent up power on the world.


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## overitnow

> quote:Originally posted by Susan Spenser:The researchers need to hurry & find a "cure" for us. Think of what awesome people we could be if we were allowed to unleash all our pent up power on the world.


There are a number of us who have found success with a variety of treatments, often not known about by your doctors or the researchers, from the hypno tapes, through supplements, and down to daily fiber. I don't know what you have tried out of these possibilities; but speaking as someone who has eliminated the problem for years, the outcome is worth the time and money spent in the search.Mark


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## skareb

Hi, its been awhile I've not posted in here so another hello to all of ya. Well no prize guessing as I've been having the same old problem for the pass so many years especially the problem with bad traffic.99% of my travel now are on bike as I feel I'm more in control. This ease off a lot of my anxiety. Thank God I've an understanding wife and we at least can enjoy shopping together. I've had a lot of problem going to shopping complex, the que in the car park are rediculous n takes forever just to come out from. Tho it sound a bit sadistic but I'm glad I'm not alone with this problem


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## 14949

I'am so glad there are other people who go through what I do. I'am only 20 years old and I deal with IBS everyday. I will share a story with you guys that makes me laugh now, but when it was happening sucked sooo bad. I was going over to this guys house that I really liked, he had no idea of my condition. I made the stupid mistake of getting a french vanilla coffee before we got to his place. lo, of course I had to go SO bad! I got the same old line every says "Lay down and you will feel better" that never works. So I must have went to use his washroom atleast 3 times before I had to call a cab. He acted nice to my face about it after he had to use the washroom but I knew he was disgusted. I never heard from him again lol. People need to be more understanding, and realize we are all human and its 'natural' lol


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## 21646

Jeanne - great website. Cam Mor Toilet ProductsOne or two of these items may be the piece of mind I have been looking for for years! Thank you!


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## Larry

Hello all. Let me just say that I suffered from this as well. As most of you probably state that you have it worse than anyone else does, I felt the same way as well. I'm talking going two or three times on the way to work everyday. In restrooms in the woods or anywhere I could possibly releive myself. But there is hope. And it isn't from using drugs, or Immodium pepto bismol, products from GNC etc. Trust me Ive tried everything. As for doctors they were no help as well. I truly believe that it is a mind set. You just have to find it. I did. I have been off all meds totally. One thing I did change in my diet is milk, ice cream. These are on my no no list.At least during the week Mon. thru Fri. I still go religiously every morning without a doubt. But I think this problem as far as the diarhea is concerned and having to go at the worst possible times is all in your head. Think of it as quiting a bad habit. Like smoking or drinking etc. Once you stop all you think of is i need a cigarette, I need a cigarette!!! as time progresses I think you will somewhat erase these thoughts as time goes on. Now surely you will still have to go, but you need to keep your mind focused on other things than "what if I have to go , where will I go? What will I do?"And you know what, you also got to tell yourself"If I #### myself I #### myself, oh well life goes on. Don't get yourself worked up. Also I am sure we are not alone,and it helps knowing someone else is probably sitting in bumpere to bumper traffic squeezing his or her checks praying to god!lol. But I can sincerely say that time heals all wounds, it really does. I had this really really bad, and yes there is always going to be a time when you will urgently have to go, that is normal. But but think positive, There is hope.Just some other thing s that I do that may help some is I always take a bottled water with me on the way to work. I always have toilet paper in the car, if it's there it is just a reassurance that if you get the urge you are prepared. Know where you will go to pull of if you need to go.The more reassurances you have that will give you comfort knowing that "Hey if I got to go I'm prepared.Diet don'ts for me:Buffets(especially Chinese. (How long has this food been sitting here?Milk, ice cream...cheese is okay for me.Pizza and pasta sauce were a trigger from me before, but they can be tolerated now.Good choices:Bottled water, cold.Rootbeer.Non greasy foods, cook meat well done.Well I do hope this helps, and if ANYONE HAS ANY QUESTIONS YOU CAN E-MAIL ME AND i WILL DO MY BEST TO RESPOND. I am sure my stories are way more interesting than yours.POSITIVE THOUGHTS!!!!


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## Larry

i GUESS MY E-MAIL ADDRESS WOULD HELP: SHARKPGH2000###YAHOO.COM


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## 13857

My husband and I went out for our anniversary which I kept telling him if we go out to eat we need to go straight home afterwards instead he talked me into seeing a movie afterwards I felt fine until we sat down in the movie theatre and the I had to go and I mean go! I went to the public restroom there and I just couldn't stop geting sick with D to make things worse there were teenage girls in the bathroom too and they were laughing because of all the noise I was making I was so imbarrased I would go and then feel a little better and go back in and then I would have to leave again this probly happened six times before I finally got my husband to leave. On the way home it felt like it took a life time to get home I just felt like I was gonna loose it literally.


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## 18031

Oh, Gemini, please don't be embarassed. We've all been in similar situations. It is hard and I know you felt self-conscious. You know what? Those teens may have laughed but I'll bet you anything that at least ONE of them has had experience with IBS-D. and you probably let her know that there are others with her digestive problems. I wish I had known that as a teen. When I've had situations like yours I tend to retreat & not go anywhere for awhile. That's a mistake. If you are isolating yourself -- try not to. I really believe social isolation makes things worse physically.







Congratulations on your Anniversary!! May you have many more happy years.


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## 19375

I am in tears right now, feeling like someone has posted about MY life. I am so socially isolated with my IBS! I try to always have a change of clothes in my car, some plastic bags and a blanket, just in case. It has not happened yet but having a plan helps.I need to be in the car with ppl I am comfortable with or the urge to go will be worse and I will panic. My colonoscopy is on Tuesday and the drive to the clinic is 25-35mins and most of it in the downtown core. I am utterly terrified of the drive to the point I am thinking of sleeping at hotel close by to reduce the anxiety of not only the test but soiling myself on the way


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## 22943

Campbellskid15, I wouldn't worry about soiling yourself on the way to the colonoscopy because if you follow their directions to the letter, you shouldn't have anything in you to come back out except some mucus, which isn't much. If you do end up soiling yourself for some reason, they most likely would not do the test because it would mean that you are not cleaned out enough to have the colon visible.


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## Gret

Campbellskid,How did the test go??? I hope you made it there ok and feel better to have it over!


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## Mary:::)))

I know what it's like...to know evey restroom from here to timbuktoo....I was at a weekend training seminar and was staying with 4 girls to a room....I held off till I got to a restroom in the hotel and was getting so sick....and some girls came in and in a snobby voice....smell what's going on in here....I have lost all modesty when I am getting sick ...people can be so mean and I hate mean people......Mary::







))


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## 23048

Hi JoanneIve just become a member of this site today and my god I could cry knowing that its not just me that feels like this. I have exactly the same problems. If im able to control things find that turning the air con on and directing it in my face relieves the heat I feel when im 'burning up'. I also try deep breathing and telling myself outloud that I will be ok and will make it to the toilet without a hitch. As a last resort I tend to stick to tried and tested routes which I know where all the toilets are either in supermarkets, publis toilets etc. A little obsessive I know - thats why im here I guess.


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## 18031

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! And that is such a comfort in belonging to this group. Stick around IBS.org and you will find comfort in knowing that others suffer and live with alot of the same situations you do.(obsessive IS a trait. Use it to your advantage and be proud! My daughter tells me I'm obsessive about being obsessive. And the problem is...?)Bless you. Enjoy your holiday season.


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## 15976

I would say carry wipes extra clothes so you have some security.When I was taking childbirth prep classes, they said it you blow out you can't poop. He said if we were at 9 CM and felt like we had to push to blow blow blow.For the panic though it would be better to deep breath. Sometimes I count backwards. Other times I self talk: "I have control over this. I can hold it in. Everything will be fine."


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## 20663

> quote:Originally posted by Emmab2003:And with my luck if I am in a bank or grocery line, someone in front of me has a huge problem. Their debit card wont go through, they dont have an item with a price on it, so they call for a price check etc etc.


i had that happen once..it was terrible, i started having a really bad attack and i had to put all of my stuff down and run to the bathroom and i still didnt make it...it was so embarassing. i was stranded in the bathroom for like a half an hour because i had to send my dad home to pick me up some extra clothes while my mom went and bought wipes to clean myself up with. ugg...certainly not a highlight in my life. but if that's the worst case scenario..bring it on..i can handle it. i carry a change of clothes and wipes etc. with me now..just in case


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## 20663

also, i too feel the car anxiety. i always have supplies just in case, but in the mornig i drive meand my cousin to school, which is a little stressful, mainly b/c im not alone and if i felt sick i couldnt just turn around or go home, i have to get him to school. And he's not very understanding about the ibs...he doesnt get it..so i try to keep my mind calm, do the breathing thing...stuff like that, we're all on the same page about it i think. but boy its niceto know that im not alone in all of this


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## 15976

I started taking Ativan before long car trips. I love it as well but it makes me drowsy. Are you the one driving?


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## 15976

I have anxiety induced D and taking Buspar a mild sedative has given me my lifeback. I suffered unnessasarily for years. The only thing that helps me is Buspar a non droswy mild seditive and Donatal a antispasmotic.How much Buspar do you take? After a month at 25 MG per day, I didn't notice any difference.


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## 21185

Just being funny. But you live in Europe. I lived in France for a stint. Just pull over to the side of the road and let it rip. Keep some toilet paper in the car and you are good to go (pardon the pun).I was so shocked when I was driving in my car on the autoroute and saw this guy on the side of the road just letting it all hang out and peeing on the side of the road. lol


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## 14139

I have posted here before. I came across it again and had to post again. I am still in the fight to get the car anxiety controlled. Every morning is the same. Before leaving my development about 4 miles- I turn around 2 out of 5 times and go back home. My husband has suggested that as long as I leave 15 min earlier every day that will leave me enough time to turn around. Yes that brings some comfort but not enough. Anyway my story is posted so I won't repeat every detail of my day. Do any of you find that unless you are going somewhere your IBS can at times be at bay. Or that the more relaxed you are the harder it is to go. Like sleeping in on the weekends. If I sleep more than 7 hours and know I don't have to be anywhere I don't get the urge to go. Which sucks because if later in the day my husband suggests going somewhere I freak because I can't go and I am afraid I will be in the middle of somewhere and the urge will come and I will not make it to the bathroom in time.This daily cycle is so frustrating and quite draining.Anyone try Lexapro and have seen imporovements with the thoughts?One thing that I use to calm down is knowing that I am heading home. So maybe try this mental game even if you are not heading home. Essentially that is what freaks us out. Not knowing how quickly we can get to a bathroom. Everytime this happens to me I always think to myself how much this effects our nervous system. Can't we just have butterflies like everyone else?


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## Nick65

JomoHave you just plucked this straight out of my mind???It is almost word for word perfect what I used to go through. Luckily those days are behind me now, thanks to Probiotics, Clinical Hypno, and Acupuncture, but don't lose hope, you will get through this and look back one day and think "How"


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## 18031

You have described my situation EXACTLY! If I am home for the day -- I am fine. The second someone says "Let's Go......" my intestines start churning.I find it somewhat easier if I try to remain in control (drive my own car, pick the time and/or destination etc). I'm also really big on the deep breathing & mantra repeating.But it does really suck when despite all the prevention you still are somewhere and have to GO. Just recently my grandson died & I was at the hospital, my mind certainly on a million other things besides my intestines, all of a sudden GO!! Thankfully my wonderful husband had scoped out the bathroom situation for me before hand & he was prepared to lead me in a hurry.The calmer we are, the more we can control our nerves the better we'll be. That was very easily SAID and not so easily LIVED.


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## 23048

Like some of you guys I find it better if im in control of the driving and the time of the journey. I tend to stick to routes I know but my therapist is making me change that to improve the thinking that I need to go - I can actually hang on. Time will tell. I usually open the window as cool air makes me feel a little easier, tell myself outloud that im going to be ok and its not a problem, also deep breath. Yes a man CAN multitask !!!


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## 18031

Well, I'll believe the man multi-tasking when I see it in my own house!! That's great for you -- cool air helps me alot. Even in winter sometimes I'll turn the a/c on and blow it right on my face. Very helpful.


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## 23048

Never underestimate the power of a gay man LOL


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## 14139

I started seeing a psychotherapist and when I told him what its like for me to leave home, travel in a car or do most things he said that what I am doing is catastrophizing (sp?) In other words imaging the worst and making it happen. He thinks if I tell myself I am catastrophizing it may help stop the thoughts. He says alot of what I am doing lies in the emotional part of my brain. Basically the part that isn't able to rationalize the problem. He said the emotional part of our brain is comparable to an animals brain. Which to me made sense. I don't know what will become of my visits with him but I will take any advise I can and try to utilize it. Maybe this will help some of you.


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## 18031

Your psychotherapist sounds right on target. My knowledge of any of this is very slender; however, one of my closest friends is married to a research scientist and his specialty is how the brain is connected to IBS. He never delights in telling me my problems are "all in my head". According to their research IBS initiates in the brain NOT the gut.I find that very interesting. And it also follows that if we can re-wire our thinking of possible negative outcomes, we'll have a better quality of life. I find that when I am well rested, good on nutrition and not stressed, therefore thinking clearly and calmly, that my IBS is much easier to control.Good luck with your therapy. I hope you will continue to share knowledge with the rest of us so we can all benefit.


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## 17503

Wow! I can't believe this has happened to so many others! I had it in my 2 week old car,with a traffic jam and baby in a car seat. I held on till tears ran down my face and cold sweat all over. Thank God my daughter's kinder-mat was there so I got it between me and the seat. Hosed myself off in the backyard when we got home (We dont have neighbors.)The mat got thrown away. Ever since, I keep disposable hospital bed protector pads in my glove compartment. Ain't IBS grand?


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## 18031

Oh my sympathies are with you. It has happened to me more than once. Once in someone else's car with them. THAT was the worst!! After a few times I am now trying not to feel too bad about and just accept it as a part of who I am. That's the yeccchy part but the rest of me is pretty darn good. Hope you can feel the same way!


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