# Depressed and dont know how to deal with it



## Jennifer Underwood (Sep 8, 2014)

I have had IBS since 2006 when I took an antiobiotic for the first time in my life and came out of it with a very messed up stomach for life. if went from IBS in 2009 to Candida for a few years and I got that under control, and then it went back to IBS last year. Im writing because its been very tough for me. Im poor and live with my parents. At 40 years old im trying to start a career in Interior Decorating with no money, no nothing. Ive scraped together tidbits ive received from cleaning my friends house and birthday money to buy probiotics. I just came off a very good stretch of taking excellent probiotics. I ran out and bought more with the only 20 bucks I had but couldn't afford the most expensive kind so I was stuck getting PB8.

I am also Gluten Intolerant. I cant go to a doctor. no insurance, no one to help me, no money. Last year I was anemic and luckily my mother was also so she gives me some of her prescription iron. without her doing that I would have been dead. For some reason wheat sucks the iron levels right out of my body. im upset because they eat wheat in this house, and I cant afford to buy better. I cant afford nothing. but I do dodge wheat the very best I can. I do slip up though and ill eat half a piece of bread, and then last night had an attack. this past summer has made my IBS attacks twelve times worse than what it ever was before and its very hard emotionally to deal with. I get headaches from other problems in my life and I have to take Excedrin a lot so couple that with iron pills I take during the day and the probiotics barely keep me afloat. both of those tear up my stomach.

today, im depressed. woke up that way. I need help and I cant get it, and I honestly wish I was dead sometimes because I cant deal with the pain anymore. I have bad cramps when my attacks start and I get so hot on the toilet I have to dump water over my head and run a fan on me. immodium brings relief but every time I take it it makes my stomach worse in the future which is quite unfair since im in so much pain and don't have anything else to take. I have mostly spent every dime I ever got on stomach stuff. I bought peppermint capsules and have sucked those down during my bad times, like last week and they don't work if you take them every day. I also drink peppermint tea sometimes, because I know that cant be taken every day either.

Im just going to boldly ask someone if by some miracle they have something to give to help me. My last probiotics had L-Glutamine in them. my current ones don't. I cant afford to buy any...


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## piyykcir (Aug 3, 2013)

Hi Jennifer,

I understand the pain of it all, I've thought to myself several times of suicidal thoughts but i'm positive you have people who love you and want you to stay here. I can guess that your from the states since u mentioned insurance issues. Sometimes there are group gatherings in your area so everyone can fight the fight together. I'm 26 and I studied in fire protection. Sadly because of my issues, all my studies and training went down the drain but I spend all my energy finding a different career that would fit around my new lifestyle. Something a little more steady than being my own boss as that requires alot of time that isn't flexible. It might be a good idea, depending on your lifestyle, to find a job in security as the times are usually more flexible. Either that or joining a recruting company to do odd jobs that you can turn down time to time if your not feeling well. These jobs are usually not the BEST career paths but they are doable. If not using them as steping stools to something with better education is a great idea too. Studying while working security is what I did for a while. It helped with my medication expenses since it was fulltime and I got some insurance coverage + living expenses. Most of my ideas are more based around my canadian surroundings so i'm not sure if they'll be helpful to you or not.

But one thing for sure is giving up should not be an option. I tell myself that everytime I get depressed. Also don't feel BAD just cause your depressed! Your totally allowed to be depressed. ANYONE going through what we have are allowed to be depressed. It's not like your mind is actually stuck in depression. It's only there due to the circumstances of your lifestyle.

I personally do not take any probitoics as I find that eventually your body will get dependant on it. You should only take them to give urself a kick start at producing them again after a serious episode of anything stomach/gut related. I only recently took probiotic for 2 weeks because I ended up with arsenic poisoning (somehow) and my system felt like a complete shut down on passing bowel or gaining nutrition or even gluten flora. I also avoid stuff like immodium as u already know, it causes long term damage in some ways. Depending on what your taking it for, u can probably find a better natural suppliment. Not as a tablet or pill but more natural form like spearmint / ginsing without all the medical mumbo jumbo. Just the spearmint tea or ginsing tea would be better idea.

Diet wise, I changed everything to be very plain. salt pepper oil and different vegis and cheap meat ( NOT ROTTING OR TURNING BAD MEAT) just cheaper cuts or whatever is on sale. Finding your local china town is probably the best way to cut the cost of food, even if its a bit of a distance. If there is none, getting natural food over production food (crackers or anything boxed really) is the best way for Gluten-free meals.

Meditation is something u should really look into, it helps with depression a lot. Mind over matter is 50% of the battle. Just being able to take yourself away, or calling a voice deep inside yourself to continue or calm down really helps. Your going to depression like u said and knowing how that felt, I'm positive that if you can push urself into a state of a better mood. u can fight for the next day.

I hope my advice will help you. Figuring out slowly a game plan is the only way to get out of the hole. The chances of something growing in that hole to get u out is pretty slim so the best way is to figure it out slowly what you can do. There are endless possibilities.


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## Jennifer Underwood (Sep 8, 2014)

Thanks for responding. sorry I am writing so late. im sick now because I was so constipated last week over and over again I contracted a bad cold which seems quite unfair.

as far as my career goes I don't need advice with that, and cant expect you to understand. I cant work a normal job health wise anyway. I also cant get work because I haven't worked in ten years and when I tried a few months ago no one called me back anyway.

I don't know about endless possibilities but im always trying to find out more to help me. I just saw a video on youtube about Colonic Massage and want to give that a try. that can help with constipation hopefully...


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