# I fear meetings, church, weddings, funerals, classes, hospitals, longs lines, some resturaunts....the list keeps going. Please help, desperate!



## Jason Lollis (Oct 8, 2014)

I have been living with this problem for nearly 2 years and I want it gone, please help. I have been avoiding almost everything I could for the past couple of years, like weddings and funerals. Luckily I work with only 4 other people and we don't have meetings. If I were having to do meetings, I know would have to quit my job. I have IBS with both constipation and diarrhea, but gas seems to be the biggest trigger to my fear/anxiety. Just 5 or 10 minutes into a quiet settings where there is people, I begin to feel bloated and sometimes I feel like I need to run to the bathroom. Not to be graphic, but when this happens, it isn't light. I feel like I'm going to explode either through gas or diarrhea. That is when the panic begins. It doesn't seem to matter what I eat and when I eat it. Just recently I had the idea to start Karate class and my first class is tomorrow for about an hour. The karate is to help me with this problem through exercise and meditation. The reason I accepted this class is because there is less than 10 people in it. I AM STILL SCARED OUT OF MY MIND TO ATTEND. I have been in and out of the doctors and gave up. I get major anxiety just sitting at the doctor's office. I plan on going back and trying again but they kept switching up medicines on me, none of which made my condition better. I went to a gastroenterologist and had an endoscopy and colonoscopy done only to have the doctor tell me nothing was there.....then what is going on? Is it all in my head? If so, how do I get it out? One thing I have never done and just read about was trying immodium. I'm going to buy some of that today to see what happens.


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## alltopsyturvy (Oct 1, 2014)

Hey Jason,

I know how you feel. I had to quit my job in April 2014. I worked in an office doing data entry, and couldn't handle it anymore due to excessive gas and almost daily attacks of diarrhea. In the summer, I missed a very dear friend's wedding - I was gutted 

Kudos to you on daring to start the Karate class! How did it go? You said you were afraid to attend - can you recognise what it is exactly that you fear?

I became completely housebound after quitting my job, couldn't even make it to the grocery store and had to have my flatmate bring me food. I'm a bit better now, but still extremely anxious and scared of using public transportation, for instance.

For the past four and a half years, I've been seeing a therapist on unrelated issues, but lately, we've also dealt with my stomach problems. We believe my symptoms are largely due to fear - much of it unconscious, having to do with traumatic experiences in past relationships. I've been extremely ashamed of my symptoms as well, thinking they somehow make me disgusting, and been afraid of being ridiculed, teased.. I've tried desperately to keep them a secret.

My therapist says I need to do the exact opposite and be honest about how I'm feeling - that this will send a message to my brain that there's nothing to be afraid of, anymore. I've gradually been more open about what I'm going through, and it helps when people are understanding and supportive. The other day, I took a train journey with a close friend, which was a huge accomplishment, silly as that may seem..  Having my friend there helped me feel less afraid, knowing there was at least one person who didn't judge me because of my 'embarrassing' stomach symptoms.

I don't know if any of this will be helpful.. As for the gas itself, I'm yet to find any good solutions. I also feel it's not always due to what I've eaten and have wondered if it's possible to get gassy just as a result of feeling anxious - I often feel it happens right after I've entered a social situation, too! Or maybe we just become more aware of it then? Having to hold it in makes matters worse as then my bowel tends to get more and more irritated, which eventually leads to urgency and diarrhea - sorry for being so graphic..


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## Mul (Oct 4, 2014)

Hey Jason,

i feel you man, i have the same issues as you in term of going out and socializing. I have anxiety and OCD so i tend to worry alot. The IBS and gas just makes it worst. I feel like its a two way road you know, IBS triggers Anxiety or anxiety triggers IBS. So sometimes a social setting such as weddings or such just puts me down quite a bit. My problem with social anxiety is not as bad as yours, i can actually get thru a wedding with preparation and alot of calming down. Or i will go with a familliar face and pretend to have fun, after a while, IT goes away and i am acutally enjoying myself. The worst bit is the initial preparation to go out, the stomach starts to rumble, i get bad thoughts of embarassing myself like accidentally pooping my self or sumthing, or i start to worry if the place i am going has no bathroom. I usually just shake the feelings off and start to get things going and preparing myself to go out. Then upon going out, the problem tend to shift to urinating, i feel like urinating or i worry if there are no bathrooms to get to if i really need to pee. It just bothers me up to the point where i am distacted by the surroundings or my friends and i actually start to have fun and forget my worries. I suppose u just have to get things going for abit, if its in your head, u can control it. u are the master of your mind. I use a reward system with my body to get me going. When i say i will just sit home and do nothing on a Saturday, i just do nothing. If i plan to go out, i need to psych my self out abit, and tell myself the routes i am going to, the bathrooms available and always have the things i need to comfort myself in hand, you know OCD can be a bitch sumtimes, and i will reward myself with a soothing mug of peppermint tea to calm my nerves when i get home, it will help me get rid of the tension and release the initial built up gas. My problem comes in the late evening, so i have eliminated going out in the evenings and night unless i need to. Hey, sometimes we need to chill out and enjoy abit. Its hard i know. But i think you can do it man. cover all the IBS bases first, take probiotics. For gas, take peppermint tea, thyme tea or carraway seeds to help you pass it out. take psyllium fiber to help you thru also. For the anxiety part, u need to help yourslf first, but hey, admitting that you have a problem is half the battle won. Hope this helps you as much as it helped me. Good luck


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## Jason Lollis (Oct 8, 2014)

Update: I got the immodium mutli symptom which is suprisingly powerful but I'm not fixed quite yet. I will be using it if I have to attend a meeting or funeral or something because It does tend to help with the gas and diarreah. One thing that bothers me about the immodium though, is that it constipates me for most of the day and sometimes on into the next day. I don't know if this makes since but I still get those gas or diarreah urges right after taking the immodium, the immodium just seems to block me from relieving those urges. After taking the immodium for the first time, I actually went to the bathroom twice thinking that I had to go, but couldn't get anything to happen. This is going to sound weird but I can't explain it any other way, I almost have those light urges 24/7. I don't know if I'm just extremely focused on it all day or what. The anxiety is still there because the urge is. As I said before, its the gas that bothers me most. This next part may sound a little funny and sometimes I can laugh at it but for the most part it is destroying me. As I sit here and type, I feel like without much effort, I could actually let out gas. Its like its sitting there already and waiting to be let out with a little push. I think my mind is somehow making this happen and when I'm in a social situation that I can't easily bail out of, I feel like I'm going to lose control of it. Like I said this may not make since but I picture myself in any social situation just losing it and letting out a big explosion. That would devestate me and embarass me beyond belief.....that is where my fear is. I feel like I have no control over my bowels and that even if I do, I will lose it any second. As far as the Karate classes, I backed out. It was 50% fear and 50% we needed to use that money for other things. Its still on a back burner but I got to move foward with a plan. There has to be a fix to this. Thanks for the responses.


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## Jason Lollis (Oct 8, 2014)

I just made a Facebook group for this...https://m.facebook.com/groups/825533204163714?ref=bookmark&soft=more


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