# I am so frustrated



## celticlady (Aug 6, 2001)

I have had a horrible time with the fibro and Myofacial pain lately. This morning I have been in tears,it hurts so much in my neck and shoulders.(this is complicated by the neck surgery a few months ago-did a fusion and placement of titanium cage,while I was under anesthesia,the placement of my neck and arms must have been lousy and causing tremendous pain)this is all complicated by:Marital problemsNew behavior problems(in my son)Long-term disabilty cutting off benefits(for no apparent reason other than to be jerks)Cant get new tens unit pads for back until I open up my case with my attorney, who will go after these jerks and get them to start paying for meds and tens unit again)will take months...New onset asthma- my sonAsthma flare-up(me)FATIGUE!!!!!!No job yet for my husband-unemployed x almost 10 monthsHusband not looking too hard-suffering depression,but refuses to see someone for depression OR for marital therapy(so I plan to go on my own)MY depression ( I havent been able to drive to my therapist,or make the office copay for months....have free clinic for therapy which I can use,gotta wait until son starts back in school,no time til then_)Very ill mother(not a long-term thing,hopefully)Problems with neighbors(they dont like the patio we are building...last time I checked it was OUR backyard.....we are quiet,respectful and good neighbors, they just want to control everyones yard besides their own.I made the mistake of telling them just that....now its like the Cold War)Husband who is diabetic-refuses to treat diabetes,probably due to depression,which he refuses to see someone for!!!!I have tried everything,he wont go,At this point,it is HIS problem,I cant MAKE him go)Hurts to type.Hard to even do self-care(wash hair,etc)Sorry to have such a pity-party.Just really sucks around our house lately.Thanks for listening.Celtic


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## M&M (Jan 20, 2002)

When it rains it pours, eh Celtic? Hang in there! We all have these bad periods at one time or another, so I understand what it feels like. Post any time you need!  ~Mrs. Mason


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## LoriAnn (Jan 31, 2002)

I'm not feeling very positive myself these days, so I'm finding it hard to be encouraging, but at least I can understand where you are coming from.Lori


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## squrts (Aug 14, 2000)

that is one full plate,i feel for ya.one thing at a time,we`ll make it thru.


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## Feisty (Aug 14, 2000)

Wow!Lots of what you list sounds like me and this house!! No asthma problems, though, so that's one less.You've got a lot on that plate of yours. Like Denny says----one step at a time.You're right---if hubbie doesn't or refuses to go for Doctoring or counseling---you can't make him and it doesn't pay to beg either----I've been there and done that a number of times and I'm there again. My hubbie has been without work just as long and he is a highly anxious person and definitely is depressed right now, but he says he doesn't have a problem-----but I do!!! I know exactly what you're feeling. PM me if you'd like. Hang in there. We'll help you through this the best we can.Karen


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## celticlady (Aug 6, 2001)

THANKS Mrs Mason,Loriann,Squrts, Feisty  You guys are great. Having a more"positve outlook" type of day,this helps(and got a massage!!!Heaven!!)Have a great day,all.(Feisty-I'll PM ya soon)







PS Hubby has a JOB INTERVIEW tomarrow!!!This will help his confidence,if nothing else


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## Feisty (Aug 14, 2000)

Wow, that's great. I hope it goes well. Wish there's be one on this end, too.How was that massage?


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## celticlady (Aug 6, 2001)

Feisty-the massage was wonderful! The job interview did NOT go well today.He knows he did not get the postion.(not because of anything he did,but because of being blind in 1 eye





















)Boy,is he is some mood this afternoon...poor guy.I told him to think of it as a "practice" interview.


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## M&M (Jan 20, 2002)

Keep hanging in there Celtic! Wish there was more we could do to help, but know that we're here for you!  , Mrs. Mason


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## Angie01 (Aug 8, 2002)

Boy do I understand how you are feeling. Just today my mother called me, she says" all you do is talk about how awlfull you feel". Well its hard to not talk about how awlfull I feel when I am in terrible pain, and having trouble with my fibro and my IBS. At least you all are here and we can talk to each other


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## Feisty (Aug 14, 2000)

Angie, how right you are. People ask you how you are, but they don't really want to know. I don't know about you, but when I ask someone how they are, I mean it with all my heartand I'm willing to listen. My hubbie tells me noone really is interested, so I should just change the subject---but I find him bringing up his back problems and the broken bones, etc he got in a motorcycle accident 6 years ago (actually, we both were seriously injured with just about the same injuries and yet he never tells anyone that I got hurt, too---except to tell them that I wasn't hurt half as bad as he was!!!) He had a punctured lung, I didn't, so it was less serious, but we both broke our right collarbones, right shoulder blades all the way through, right ribs (front and backside---5 for me and 8 for him---not fun). Had to spend 2 weeks in a hospital out in S. Carolina before we could fly back home to Wisconsin.Oh, Oh, Here I go telling someone something they don't want to hear. Right??!!







My oldest son and I have this little one word saying that tells each other how things really are, but that we can't discuss them at the moment due to "listening ears" or something. We say we are "fine". He called the other night and asked how I was and I said "fine"---then I asked him how he was and he says "fine". Then we both laughed, because we knew we were both feeling like s**t.!! A small slice of dry humor I guess.


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## M&M (Jan 20, 2002)

Oh yes, I understand what you are saying completely! It is always hard when people ask me "How are you?" Because I know only a handful will be willing to hear the grim truth. Nice that there's plenty of listening ears here!~Mrs. Mason


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## ncottle (Nov 28, 2001)

I feel for you too. I have had so much pain with the fibromyalgia this summer. Have lots of allergies as well. Yes...you hate for people to ask how you feel. Sometimes you are not real sure yourself. The dr. I used to have (now retired) could keep it under control quite well...but you know doctors all have their "own" way of treatments and you might as well give up trying to tell them what really helps...they refuse to listen.


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## celticlady (Aug 6, 2001)

Fiesty,Mrs Mason,and everyone else-I am so glad for this board! I ALWAYS want to hear what you really feel like, not just the "I am fine" response.















GRRRRR! this AM my father basically brushed off my fibro sx ( he apparently thinks I am just LAZY,this breaks my heart since I am a hard worker,and I used to even work double-shifts in the profession I can no longer do.......







) now today it hurts so much it is hard to do much even here at home....To heck with that!!!I am a good person,and my work does not determine my WORTH.







( I gotta get this phrase into my brain,it is hard to have self-confidence sometimes)


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## Feisty (Aug 14, 2000)

Right on, Celticlady!!!







We need to reassure ourselves that we are a very "okay" person----in spite of what someone else thinks they know more about!!!!If I was there----I'd tell your Dad to "stick it in his ear"!!







Oh, Oh, I'm getting Feisty here!!!














Feels so good.I was just told by hubbie that I will not be going to an "out-of-network" provider to have a special Doppler study done on my left leg---been having quite a time of it with some bad veins and swelling and aching. Saw a Vascular Doc and he would like me to go to this "other" place to have the test because he said it is a better test and will give him a very good overall picture of what is going on with those inner veins and the blood flow, etc. Well, our Insurance won't pay 40% of it, so it would amount to about $120 we would pay ourselves. I don't think that's too bad considering the good "study" that would be accomplished. Hubbie says---what's wrong with going to the first place? Why is this other test so important? I ended up raising my voice and telling him that he has known for years that I have had lots of trouble with my legs and it just plain irritates me that I should just settle for an inaccurate test so that we don't have to pay a little more. AARRGGHH!!!!He cuts corners that way, but he still makes sure he goes to movies, etc. ??????? Am I dense or what??!!!


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## celticlady (Aug 6, 2001)

I say-stand firm and go to the "better" place with the better vascular studies.( to your hubby,use lots of "I" statements...."I feel this is best for my health..." not "YOU" as in"you are preventing me from getting good care!!! Bleep,.bleep,bleep!")Good luck,Feisty.You may not see me on board for a few days.Hurts to type,and having a rough time caring for my 9 yr old while hubby at work.........


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