# New to the Struggle - Don't want to be the sick girl anymore



## KmJc928 (Feb 20, 2015)

Hi All,

This has all been a very new experience for me. I'm 25, but I didn't start experiencing IBS symptoms until this past fall, and since then it has been a continuous downhill spiral. It started with alternating diarrhea and constipation, but more recently my biggest symptoms have been intense nausea and vomiting, which from my very new understanding, is pretty uncommon in IBS. I also feel anxious almost all of the time and I feel like my body gets stuck in a cycle with the anxiety - I wake up feeling anxious and sick, spend the majority of the morning on the toilet experiencing simultaneous diarrhea and vomiting, which makes me miss more school and increases the anxiety, starting the whole cycle over again. The anxiety is so intertwined with the IBS symptoms that it's hard not to feel like I'm doing this to myself, like I'm ruining my own life and I could just prevent this if I were a little stronger.

I'm having a lot of difficulty accepting that I am sick and reaching out for help. I approached the Dean of my law school and while she seemed caring at first, I now fear that I'm asking for too much or being too much of a hassle. I've also tried approaching professors about my increased absences and was surprised at how unsympathetic many of them were. It makes me feel like I'm not cut out for law school. I've worked so hard to get to this point in my life, and now it's being taken away from me because my body won't act right. It is so frustrating - I've been an overachiever my entire life and I'm having a lot of trouble coping with not being able to perform at my normal level.

My friends, family, and significant other have been much more understanding, but it took me reaching a breaking point before I was even able to reach out to most of them - I felt that I didn't want to bother them with my 'silly stomach problems'.

I fear that my whole life has been reduced to becoming that poor sick girl and it is so, so frustrating. Or on the other end of it, that people don't understand how much this is really killing me and how much it takes out of me. And even though I'm in so much pain and discomfort, I don't feel like I'm sick 'enough' for anyone to care. There are so many colliding emotions and none of them make sense.

I am working with a team of doctors and therapists, but we're in the very beginning stages and from what they tell me, it's going to be a long process. I've only been dealing with this for about 6 months and I'm already exhausted. I don't know how I can keep my will to keep going up when it feels like everything is crashing down around me.


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## RubyJayne (Feb 25, 2015)

Hello.

I am going through the same struggle and was diagnosed yesterday morning. Today I have accepted it but feel like I still do not know the exact information for me to feel comfortable again

X


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## Jesse1234 (Jan 4, 2009)

Hey girls,
Sorry to hear you are struggling. There will be a lot of information to digest and a lot of changes to come in the future. You need to dig deep to find that inner strength.

I got IBS when I was 17 and now I'm 25. I never got a chance to set up my life the way I wanted too as I hadn't left school yet when I was struck with this, and it's safe to say it's kept me back from doing things I wanted to do. I couldn't even imagine being halfway through setting up your life only to be struck with this. Just don't let it get the better of you and don't give up!


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## Milli Fox (May 14, 2015)

Hey hun,

I know how you feel. I struggled with this for a long time, from the age of 16 (Im 25 now as well). I ended up studying Nutritional Therapy because of it. I know how embarrassing and frustrating it is to be in pain and feel like you have to hide what you're going through.

I'm lucky enough to have gotten rid of the majority of my symptoms through nutrition and some supplementation alone. My journey is definitely not over- new things pop up along the way, but if you were ever interested in chatting let me know.


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## Leo41 (Dec 13, 2010)

Trust me I feel for you, but also cannot imagine going through what I do now at your age.

I have been told I have IBS, and to be honest my worst symptoms are horrible pain... crampy, spasming in waves in my lower left colon, and vomiting when it flares badly.

I have no doubt at all a fair bit of this is caused by the anxiety and stress of the disorder itself... ie missing days of work/school... constant worry if it will be today again, etc. The thing is the disorder also makes our "guts" more sensitive at the same time, which makes that vicious cycle worse.

I am curious how things have been more recently for you, and if you have found anything more out from the docs?

Ray


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