# venting



## 13777 (Sep 5, 2006)

OK I have nothing but pitty. My life sucks b/c of IBS/Crohn's. The docs suck, the toilet sucks, the d sucks, etc. No one understands, not even me. I don't know how much longer I can do this. I am not a victim. I have won all the other battles in my life, but not this one. People to think I am gay (not that there's anything wrong with that). Decent looking, outgoing, owns business, 29 yr old male, not married or dating. But how can I date? OK fine, I have a bit of a low self esteem, but I can get over THAT... not the IBS, that is a deal breaker. No one knows, never will. Sometimes I want to die. Why me? I did so much good with so little. I came from a broken home with an abusive mom who later went insane. And then I took care of her and bought her a house, and send her money every month (aren't I the perfect angel? lol, I am not but I still don't think I deserve this). And maybe it isn't about that, it's about cause and effect. And why do I sometimes get the feeling my doc was sleeping with his gastroenterology 101 professor in college(that's how he passed..get it?) And most importantly, what am I supposed to do? I am not crazy, I just feel like any other normal human being would feel, if he felt like he had food poisoning... all the time!I hope that I will find a cure. The IBS has got me as a prisoner at home. I have tried many things and will go on until I find it. And if I don't find a cure, I will keep on looking. Maybe one day I will come to terms with it and accept that I just have to live with it. I hope that day never comes.


----------



## 21857 (Aug 15, 2006)

Hey KC!!I know how you feel, sometimes I think with all the other #### in my life, why do I have this huge other thing hanging over me?!?!?!I know its not fair and all that stuff, but letting it get you that down doesnt help much either. I know it is easier said than done, to 'think positively' cos most the people that say it have no idea what your going through, but thats the only way that I can get through some days, by thinking of the positives and hoping tomorrow is a better day. Life isnt meant to be easy, but just try and take it all in your stride, and hopefully things wilkl become a little easier for you,hope everything works out well for you!


----------



## 13777 (Sep 5, 2006)

Thanks Zoe, that mean a lot to me.


----------



## 14849 (Aug 25, 2006)

> quote:Originally posted by KC-in-L.A:OK I have nothing but pitty. My life sucks b/c of IBS/Crohn's. The docs suck, the toilet sucks, the d sucks, etc. No one understands, not even me. I don't know how much longer I can do this. I am not a victim. I have won all the other battles in my life, but not this one. People to think I am gay (not that there's anything wrong with that). Decent looking, outgoing, owns business, 29 yr old male, not married or dating. But how can I date? OK fine, I have a bit of a low self esteem, but I can get over THAT... not the IBS, that is a deal breaker. No one knows, never will. Sometimes I want to die. Why me? I did so much good with so little. I came from a broken home with an abusive mom who later went insane. And then I took care of her and bought her a house, and send her money every month (aren't I the perfect angel? lol, I am not but I still don't think I deserve this). And maybe it isn't about that, it's about cause and effect. And why do I sometimes get the feeling my doc was sleeping with his gastroenterology 101 professor in college(that's how he passed..get it?) And most importantly, what am I supposed to do? I am not crazy, I just feel like any other normal human being would feel, if he felt like he had food poisoning... all the time!I hope that I will find a cure. The IBS has got me as a prisoner at home. I have tried many things and will go on until I find it. And if I don't find a cure, I will keep on looking. Maybe one day I will come to terms with it and accept that I just have to live with it. I hope that day never comes.


Join the club. This is how most of us do feel. We just try to live the best we can, man. Want a suggestion on dating? Find someone that like you, has IBS. They're the only people that will ever understand what you're really going through.I mean, c'mon, let's be honest. There's not exactly a huge market for people that are constantly in the bathroom and spend 75% of their lives on the "Angry Chair."When I met my wife I didn't have IBS. That came two years later when she was there to witness my first attack. She could've just as easily walked out on me, but she didn't. She has stuck by my side through the thick and thin of it all, and you better bet your ass that IBS affects her life too. My wife is a wonderful person, because most people would've just turned their back on me.It has not always been easy. I have told my wife countless times that I wish she would leave me and find someone that she could enjoy her life with instead of spending it waiting around for me. I feel that I deprive my wife of a fulfilling life. We never go on vacations, and when we do I sit in the hotel room and sh*t for the better part of the day. We've never been to Las Vegas, and I probably never will be. I've never been to see the Grand Canyon, and I probably never will. I've never been to the "12 Hours at Sebring" or the "24 Hour LeMans," and I probably never will be. I'll never have a good job because my stomach is so f-ed up that I wouldn't be able to make it to school so I could get a college degree. That's right, I'm 32 years old and work part time at a f-ing auto parts store making $9 per hour, because in the mornings I can't sit in my car for more than 10 minutes because I feel so f-ing sick.I have a lot of ambition, and quite the strong will, and I think there are plenty of people here than can vouch for my "strong will." I am not a quitter. I am a bull and just charge right into things. I'm the successful businessman. I'm the guy that's busted his ass for the big house and the Lamborghini.The only problem....I have IBS that holds me back from "living the life." Nothing kicks me in the ass harder than knowing that I'm stuck "shoveling sh*t" when I could be making one Hell of a living for my wife and I.....except there's IBS that's done nothing but hold me back for what I believe were the most important years of my life career-wise.My life revolves around a f-ing toilet. So does yours. "The day" has come. Accept the fact that while you can live a good life, it will never be as fulfilling as the life of someone without IBS.


----------



## 13777 (Sep 5, 2006)

Flat - Have you tried Linda's Calcium? I am giving it a shot right now. As far as your job goes, why don't you try doing something out of home, maybe online. I know it's easier said than done, but just an idea.hope you get better soonk


----------



## 14849 (Aug 25, 2006)

> quote:Originally posted by KC-in-L.A:Flat - Have you tried Linda's Calcium? I am giving it a shot right now. As far as your job goes, why don't you try doing something out of home, maybe online. I know it's easier said than done, but just an idea.hope you get better soonk


Thanks, KC. No, I haven't tried calcium. I guess at this point maybe it's worth a shot.Thanks for the well wishes on getting better.







You too!


----------

