# A Special Guy! HELP!



## Godsent316 (Sep 9, 2002)

I have this special guy, and we're not dating or anything, but we're close to it. The only thing is, I don't know if I shoudl tell him right away about IBS or not. I mean, it's so sporadic, I'd hate for him to come all the way out here and me not be able to do anything cuz I'm sick.. but I've also scared guys away by telling them that I'm sick and they don't have a cure. Anyone that's been through this have a solution?


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## PippylongStockings (Jun 6, 2002)

If you don't make a big deal about your IBS he wont. If you are sick just take a couple immodium and go to see him. The more a person hears that you are suffering or sees you are the more they might be scared.


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## NZChick (Nov 19, 2001)

I agree. Don't make it look like you want to make it his problem and all will go well. Explain yourself if you get sick. Tell him more as time goes on how it affects you. I had to tell my new man little bits and he really understood...I was lucky, but then I thought, hey, if he doesn't handle it then he's not "the one". Good luck. Remember that you are a valuable person and just as good as the next person...most people have something that they are embarrased about anyway.


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## Guest (Oct 17, 2002)

i started going out with my best boy friend/ crush of over a year only a couple months ago. he'd always known i had stomach problems/allergies, but when we actually started dating, it got so that i needed to tell him, because i couldn't just stay home when i felt bad without justifying it. i sort of tried to explain to him what was going on, but it's kinda embarrassing to talk about. so i know this seems cheesy, but i emailed him that "molly's brochure" thing (it's got a link on the main page), which tells what it's like to have ibs. i just cut out the parts which didn't apply to me, and sent it to him. (i told him i was going to send a thing explaining what's wrong with me so it wasn't a total surprise).it actually went really well, he was really happy that i sent it to him so he could try and understand what's going on. and he said he felt better because he was starting to worry that there was something really wrong with me (like i was dying or something), so he was kinda relieved. i think i'd wait until you start dating to give him the whole run-down. but it's worth it to have the support of the person you spend all your time with. and too, i think as long as you tell him that you'll do your best to try and not let it stop you from doing stuff, but that when you say you're feeling too aweful, he needs to be understanding, that might help from him feeling like you keep ditching him, and that it's not just an excuse.and like everyone will tell you, if he isn't supportive and understanding, KICK HIM TO THE CURB!!!good luck,midge.


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## Nikki (Jul 11, 2000)

Well, i have this habit now of telling guys as soon as i start to get close to them. This normally does not scare them away so i wouldn't worry. My new guy is not fazed by it in the slightest and neither was my last boyfriend, in fact, his ex had also suffered from IBS. Its a small world. Just explain that IBS is what you have, most of the time you will be fine, but sometimes you wopn'tbe able to come out if youare feeling ill, also tell him not to ask you if you are ok a million times a day because yuo will tell him if you are not.Thats what i did and it worked just fine. This is the link to Mollys Brochure. http://www.ibsgroup.org/main/aboutibs.html


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