# Bad news



## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

I hestitated to post this here, but I found out that my dad has stage four colon cancer today. His prognosis is not good, although there is always optimistic.I was not going to post this and then I thought I would do to the importantance of getting a colonoscopy. If he had done that sooner the prognosis would have likely been much better. He has severe back problems and was losing weight and had an opstruction so was constipated, but thought it was back related. If your not getting a colonoscopy do to fear, over come that fear and get one done, its very important and may save your life.I am still in some shock over this for sure qand was not going to post like I said, but if it helps get people diagnosed right and saves anyone its worth it.


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## Guest (Nov 8, 2002)

Eric... I am so sorry to hear of this. You and your family have my deepest sympathy.We also just learned that my father-in-law has Leukemia.Do you have a network of support while you are going through this?A shoulder for you,  Evie


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

Oh Honey..... I'm so sorry.







(((((((Eric)))))))







Will have you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.Here if ya need me.Hey folks....... The scope means hope.  BQ


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## Guest (Nov 8, 2002)

"Hope is a thing with feathersthat perches in the souland sings a tune without wordsand never stops at all".........Emily DickensonWe will keep your father in mind when we pray this evening.Evie


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

Thanks, I do really appreciate the support.I will be okay and am not (although its really appreciated so much looking for sympathy), but how important it is to get the test.I am also hoping he has a while still at least and will be able to deal with it as it goes.I have very differents thoughts I think, then some on illness and death, in part really because of the many times I thought about suicide with my IBS, but also for other reasons. Quality of life for me has a lot to do with it also. Not that I am down playing it either or that its not a huge emotional issue and loss for him and for me, but because this is a stage issue and I just found out today and because I didn't want to bring my issues to the bb here really. Its depressing for one and that is being honest. I will be okay and have a lot of friends and family and support, that will help him and me along the way.Right now he seems to be in relatively good spirits and was pretty honest to me about them. I am also glad that we will have some time, because we have not been hugely close over the years mainly from being in different places in the world, but we do love each other and have a good relationship and I will continue to work on that for all the time he has on earth here.







I am not so much concerned about me, but about him.


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

Yup I know. It will be all about your concern for him for awhile. Great tho that you have an open line of communication, that is critical.And hey! What makes you so special that you are exempt from bringing your "problems" here????Huh??? I love ya, but you ain't that special.







(((Eric and Dad)))  BQ


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## kamie (Sep 14, 2002)

Eric, none of us are ever Okay when we receive scary news about our loved ones and especally our parents.It is a difficult time that requires just doing ones best day by day.Getting your self checked would probably give your father some peace of mind as he moves through the stages of his illness.I'm sure in his own way he is worried about you too.Yes, such cancers are often missed because they are thought to be back trouble.Just like a lot of women don't get the right diagnositics about female cancers.You are very right. Early detection is the key to our health. Quick action and early detection has saved many a life and helped to bring awareness to others.I was recently contacted by a friend who is having colon cancer surgey this week.As you know, Mr. Kamie got a precancer pathology report back from the time in september that he was gushing blood.It's all scary Eric but we are the support team for our loved ones and we have to hold up the foundation of their support on so many unseen levels.You have an enormous system of support and you just need to know that alot of people will be sending the best of their healing thoughts to both you and your loved ones.Hugs and Hope,Hang in There.Kamie


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## JE (Nov 3, 2002)

Sorry to hear this eric. From what I have seen you are always concerned about other's problems and offer them hope and help. Know that a lot of people are keeping you and your Dad in their prayers.Jerry


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

All the comments are really appreciated and the support and love and prayers a very good thing.







Thank you from the heart.


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## Fuzzz (Jun 14, 2000)

hi EricI am sorry to hear yur dad has cancer...yu and him are in mi prayerstake care fuzzz


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## Maedchen (Jun 3, 2000)

<<Eric>>After all the support and encouragement you've given to us on this board, I think you are more than entitled to have some of your own in return.(so don't you be denying us that privilege







)I'm very sorry to hear about your dad. I'll be keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.


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## carolauren (Mar 14, 2002)

So sorry to hear this, Eric. And I concur with what Maedchen said above.


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## cookies4marilyn (Jun 30, 2000)

Oh no... (((((HUGS))))))I am so sorry to hear this, but just like the others here, you know you have my hearfelt prayers and understanding.It will soon be one year (Dec)since I lost my dad;the last few months of his lief we became the closest we had ever been. This is not an easy time for either of you, but, you do have a chance to strengthen your bonds, and perhaps that will give some solace. Every bit of time is a gift (verses an abrupt accident, etc.) But, still, all the platitudes in the world can't change it or make it better, but just knowing that there are hundreds around the cyber world, as well as your close family and friends, are here to support and love you and care for you always...I will be giving you a quick call soon, if ya need to talk; if not, you still have our love and care....Love and prayers to you, my friend, and God's comfort... ~ Marilyn


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## Nikki (Jul 11, 2000)

Oh no! I only just read this. I don't know what to say other than that i am so sorry. But saying sorry is probably not going to help so i am at a loss.I have lost a friend recently- and another friend of mine has gone missing. Make the most of what time to you have with your father or you will regret it. The only thing i want to do was to say goodbye to my freind. Make sure you get to do that.All my love,Nikki


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## linda2001 (Apr 14, 2001)

Eric,I am so sorry to hear about your father, I will keep you and your father in my thoughts and prayers.


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## ohnometo (Sep 20, 2001)

Eric,Just letting you know that I will be sending many blessings your way for you and your family....The colonoscopy is very important and I have been trying to tell my mother for many years to get one...but she just wont listen and thinks because she can run to the bathroom with no pain there she is ok







Just remember our Angels will take care of us and I am really sorry to hear about your Dad...


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## JackieGian (Mar 23, 2002)

Eric,I'm so sorry to hear about your father. I just lost my mother this summer to liver disease, so I have an idea what you're going through. You've always been there for so many of us, so if there's anything at all we can do for you, please give a holler.  Jackie


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## Yarnie (Jul 15, 2002)

Hey EricSo sorry to hear about your father's illness. You're not asking for sympathy, and it's not sympathy as such that we are offering, it's just support and our prayers...my mother has just got out of hospital after a really scary liver illness and I know how frightening it is. My thoughts are with your father and yourself, and I sincerely hope his health improves. Try to stay positive, my step mother overcame her breast cancer... there are always positive recoveries, we just don't always hear of them. Stay positive...and thanks for the advice


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## Lauralee (Jan 4, 2002)

eric,I have to admit I was pretty floored by this news, brings a lot of emotions to the surface for me. I am sending you hugs and support and please know that you, your father and your family are in my thoughts. I know what you are going through and it hurts like hell. I wish I could do this in person, but a cyber-hug will have to do.(((((((((eric))))))))  Lauraleeps I agree with the others, you do so much for us, please don't hesitate to let us do something for you!


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## SkinBagBecky (May 17, 2002)

The others have expressed my thoughts so well, can only sum it up by saying *WE CARE ABOUT YOU!!!!*


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

You all will be the first I ask if I need anything.







I am better at giving help then recieving it really and I am also glad I have been able to really help and make a difference for people.They think he will have at least a year maybe two, or maybe they can manage it for longer then that, but its in the liver and lympnodes and that is not good.Thank you for your prayers and support very much. I am sure this will get more difficult over time, I am more right now in shock mode over it and am working my feelings out at the moment. I am okay really at the moment, not that it is an okay thing, but I am processing it all slowly.I will have some time to communicate with him and he knows and I know we both love each other even if we were not hugely close over the years, we have shared an okay and even a great humourous (we both like to laugh) relationship. This has helped a lot over the years.I promise here if I need help I will ask and if I need more help I will find some professional help. At the moment its one step at a time though and I know dwelling on it is not so healthy either, even though that is tough. Thanks again everyone I do appreciate the caring and concern and support and love and friends I have made here, they have helped me for sure in my life. You have all posted such nice comments.







I am actually more speechless at the moment.


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## sickofsick (Nov 4, 1999)

Eric, so sorry to hear this. Just wanted you to know you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.


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## nmwinter (May 31, 2001)

hey eric - i'm keeping you and your dad in my prayers. I know you weren't asking for sympathy and I think it's wonderful of you to keep reminding people to heed warning signs and get things checked out. But you know you have our support anyway for what you and your dada are going through. take carenancy


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## kamie (Sep 14, 2002)

Ya know Eric, my business partner in my body therapy practice took a break from life and went to tend her Dad when he was ailing with Stomach Cancer.It was a long process but she said the best of the whole time was simply the day to day stuff that needs tending in the most simple of ways.When working with the ill person, each attention to the simplicity of life becomes it's own gift of enrichment.Many many parents and children get the wonderful opportunity to learn new things about eachother that are brought together by an illness.My dad died young.He was 48 when he died of coronary heart disease.When our parents beome ill it awakens the healer of our hearts and something in our reconnection makes the illness and transitional stage all the more better for the parent.Be well Eric and let your heart carry joy to your Father at this time.Hugs,Kamie


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## Guest (Nov 9, 2002)

I know this is relative, but just last year my mother died in my arms. Experience as much of your father as you can. He will always know that you were there for him.(Maybe you are more worried about him... but some of us are more concerned about you.)I know what it is to be suicidal. Know what? We're a whole lot stronger for having survived that episode in our lives, huh?Hang in there, Evie


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## luckylou (Sep 22, 1999)

Eric, so sorry to hear this sad news. You and your family will be in my prayers.


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## zayaka26 (Jul 5, 2001)

I was driving and thinking about you 30 minutes ago (because I am reading a nice little book on stress and was thinking about that) and come here and see this.







I'm sorry this is happening to you and your family. My best wishes are for you during this difficult time.


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## DonnaV (Aug 10, 2002)

Dear Eric, My thoughts are with you and your dad. I have recently lost my mother in law to colon Cancer and I wish I had found this board while we were going through all that. As you have said though, at least you know you have quality time to spend together and you both know you love each other. We had good times too with my mother in law. The only advice I can offer is to keep him comfortable. Now is the time that this Material world is of no importance. Love and being there for each other is what counts. By you posting this on the board will help others get the colonoscopy as My mom in law nagged me the whole time she was ill for me to have one done because of my suffering with IBS and I did go and have one. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

Again, thanks for the thoughts and prayers from everyone. I don't know what to say but thanks you from the heart.I think there seems to be some theraputic aspects to this for me as well as everyone and I think that is good.I know many here have lost friends and loved ones and my sincere thoughts and prayers back to all of you also.







To those who have their parents, don't forget to give them a hug also.







To those who have lost someone always remember to remember and say something nice to them in your thoughts.  At the moment I am hanging in there and waiting for him to have his operation on Monday. I will call him sunday and wish him the best of course. Then wait until he recovers from that and figure out when I will go to Colorado to see him. Again thanks for the concern, thoughts and prayers for me and my dad.


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

(((((Eric)))))Sounds like you have a good plan for coping with all of this. Best thing for me was taking it a day at a time. Ya never know what tomorrow will bring and each day is a reason for hope and an opportunity for squeezing every ounce of goodness out of it. I'll be sending extra good stuff for Monday.With my Dad, I let the Doc's tend to his body. I figured I could serve best by tending to his soul.Let us know how you all are doing.  BQ


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## norbert46 (Feb 20, 2001)

Eric, I will keep you and your father in my thoughts and prayers also. My father passed away in April after several months of hospitalization for advanced cancer and it is a difficult situation. Somehow as we concentrate on helping and sharing love we slide through the time in a numb fog. I wish both of you well, you are a great caring guy and I'm sure Dad is too! Your friend, Norb


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

Thanks Norbert, and my condolences to you jmy friend, I have been wondering about you and how you have been doing. I am very sorry to hear about your dad and I hope your okay. I am glad to see you.


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## ncottle (Nov 28, 2001)

Just wanted to express my feelings to you Eric...and for what you are going through. I lost my father to cancer a few years ago and I can understand exactly what you are feeling right now. It is good that you are expressing your feelings here. It is strange but I found that sometimes "friends" could be more help than my own family...because they were experiencing the same feelings as me and even though you share that part of it and feel even closer to one another...you can't really comfort each other because everyone is hurting in the same way. My prayers are with you.


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## John (Aug 6, 1999)

Eric,I'm sorry to hear of your dad's cancer situation. My thoughts and prayers are with you,your family,especially your dad.


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

Thanks John and Nicole, and Nicole I am very sorry to hear about your dad.Thanks again for the thoughts and prayers.


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## Sherree (Mar 27, 1999)




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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

Eric, Hope the surgery went as well as possible.I'll be keeping the prayers & good stuff up.  BQ


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## Jeffrey Roberts (Apr 15, 1987)

Eric,I'm just reading this now for the first time.I'm sorry to hear about it.Jeff


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## Bewitched (Jul 24, 2002)

My prayers are with you and your family Eric


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## Feisty (Aug 14, 2000)

Eric,I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. Take care.


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

Thanks everyone, he has been released from the hospital and is now home. He had his colon removed, but they could not cut out one tumor close to his aorta, which was not a good thing, he will recover from the surgerry and then they will use Chemo, but its good he is home and out of the hospital.Now my stepfather is sick to with some weird thing they cannot figure out with nausea chills and a fever, of unknown origin. This has happened before and has been going on and off for a couple years now, he gets sick gets better and then months later gets sick. My real father said to me I have daddyitis.







At least he still has his humor.Thanks for everyones prayers and thoughts they are highly apprecitated and I am personally taking things oneday at a time with everything.I am not talking so much about it here and will post any new developments, I don't want at the moment to work myself up with it all to much, there is not a whole lot I can do ( mainly ray and support him of course) and if I constanly focus on it, it could effect me and the IBS and if I am down I won't do much good to anyone. So one day at a time and I talk to him quite often and that is good.Thanks again everyone.


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## Guest (Nov 17, 2002)

Sounds like you're doing everything right, Eric.Murphy's law more often than not prevails. sorry to also hear of your Stepfather's issues. Glad your birth father still has his sense of humor... after all, it is still the best medicine, is it not?Are you watching that Packer/Viking game this afternoon? Whew! Talk about flags !Best Wishes,Evie


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## zayaka26 (Jul 5, 2001)

I'm happy he is out of the hospital. Father are very special, you are doing the right thing ike Evie said.


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## Persistance (Jul 11, 1999)

Fondest prayers, Eric.


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## kamie (Sep 14, 2002)

Eric, as you know, getting clear and workable diagnosis' are not the easiest things to come by.For me the journey to know what's wrong is now into it's second year.It was a year ago when I began. It's been 7 months since the surgeries happened.And still, the journey is not resolved.The only thing to do Eric is to keep on keeping on.To knock again at another door. To not accept the unacceptable answers when your inner self tells you to try again.it's hard.It's tiring.But it just has to be done.keep on keeping on.Hugs and Hope,Kamie


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