# getting on with life



## 18476 (Apr 1, 2006)

I'm a 22 yr old girl, who has been coping with ibs-d for two years now. the last year has been terrible, and as the ibs-related anxiety grew, i changed from being a happy and sociable person, into a tightly wound and stressed out recluse! however, a traumatic split with my long term boyfriend just over four months ago has forced me to take a long hard look at my life. i realised that i was missing out on my twenties, sitting at home waiting for a d attack which may never come. i started to go out more, partying with my friends and taking trips away at the weekend. i always had my imodium close at hand, but (suprisingly) never needed it! i am learning to live with my dodgy tummy, instead of fighting against it, and always letting it win. i sympathise so much with everyone who posts here, because ibs is a truly life altering thing. but i am starting to realise that i can't spend these years of my life restricting everything that i do 'just in case'. i hope that everyone here finds their own way to cope, and wish everyone the best of luck Ashalee xx


----------



## 14448 (Jun 14, 2006)

Glad you're finding a way to cope Ashalee







I'm also trying hard to get my life back. I'm about to start my final year at uni and it's my last chance to enjoy being a student, but I have social anxiety disorder as well as IBS and my instincts are to stay safely in my flat on my own. The downside of this is i'm bored, lonely, the anxiety gets worse and, like you, I feel I'm wasting my 20s. We will never be young again!I've devised a CBT plan that involves exposing myself to my fears- I make myself go out every day, even if it's just to go in shops or the gym. I'm beginning to feel slightly less afraid of the outside world. When the uni term starts I'm determined to make friends and join in social stuff (something I've been meaning to do for the last 3 years of my BA!







) I think it really helps if you ACCEPT you have IBS and have to live with it. I still feel furious sometimes, but most of the time I just get on with life. Like, if you had asthma, you'd have to carry your inhalers everywhere and avoid triggers like smoky places/tree pollen/excessive exercise. Well, we have to carry immoduim and avoid trigger foods/ excessive stress etc. At least IBS won't kill you!


----------



## 21787 (Mar 26, 2006)

Ashalee, what a pretty name! I'm also 22, and your story sounds EXACTLY like mine...it's quite scary. I've been dealing with IBS-D for almost 2 years now, although I'm still going through tests therefore I'm not diagnosed yet (but I'm sure it is IBS). 3 months ago I had a horrendous split from a long-term relationship which I totally didn't see coming (although it was my decision doh). The stress caused me so much upset in my life...I also encompassed the 'just in case' way of living. Until recently, I have been 'waiting' for the next attack, but I'm trying to get out a lot more now, realised that my friends are there for me when I need them. Thanks for your story, it's so good to relate to someone! One last question before I go - how do you overcome your anxiety? I find it really difficult!RachL x


----------



## 22288 (Aug 5, 2005)

I konw exactly how you guys feel. I'm only 15 and I have had IBS for about two years now and I dont get as much D as I used to but I get terrible spazms wind and C. Im at the point in life where I must do really well in all my Exams to get secure a good future and before I had IBS I was quite ambisious and loved to socialise. Now I dont even want to sit next to my friends in class. Im scared that everywhere I go I will need the toilet or have bad wind/spazms. Its really taken over my life. I tend to forget about IBS when I am having fun but that is so rare because the stress from school and exams means that my fun time is very limited. I did tell my friends about my condition but I dont think they will ever understand fully. They tell me to just forget about it and that there are people worse off than me( which is no comfort to me). They dont really seem to resepct my wishes when I want to be left alone or sit on my own or at the end of the row in classes they just think about what they want and not what I need to help me. The drugs my doctor gave me dont always work and I want to try something new but my mum is dead set against it. It's had a strong affect on my personality and my relationship with my friends. Infact just today I was having a minor attack and I asked my friend to move up because I didnt want to gas them out(lol). They took it the wrong way and I felt so guilty but I didnt feel comfortable with them around. They usually invade my space which makes my condition worse and when I get attacks im scared they will laugh at me(they have in the past.)I just wish I was "normal". I have a meeting tomorrow with the Drama group at school to audition for a play and I really want to go but I'm worried about my tummy. I'm still going but I just with there way a way out.


----------



## 18476 (Apr 1, 2006)

thanks for the replies guys, its so nice to hear from people who have the same problems, fears and anxieties. i consider myself to have pretty mild IBS, especially compared to some of the people who post here. I have a very delicate stomach and have to watch what i eat carefully. i also get occasional random bouts of d which i generally cannot find any reason for. i reached a point a while ago, where i was so afraid of being hit with an unexpected attack, that i basically stopped going out unless absolutely necessary. thing are different now though. i now see that there is too much out there, too much fun to be had, and people to meet for me to stay in! RachL, it is very hard to control the anxiety and i totally sympathise. i still get very panicky at times (in the car, in a traffic jam the other day springs to mind!), but deep breathing helps alot, as well as reminding yourself that this moment, like all the others, will pass. I'm sorry to hear that you had a horrible breakup too, they really do suck!but there is life on the other side, and being single is actually a lot of fun!Sukie, good luck with the CBT, its so much better to be doing something proactive, because as we all know, the anxiety only gets worse if its left alone! i'm starting my final year at uni, and am gonna enjoy every last minute of it, hope you do the same!Ashaleex


----------

