# I cry every day ): and im sixteen.



## Demolishing-Dezz (Aug 25, 2011)

I need help. I need someone to talk to. Someone that knows what i am going through..I have had IBS for a couple months now. It is just recently getting bad. I talk to my mom about my IBS but its embarrassing. I am so embarrassed by what i have, I know that its not my fault but it still makes me terribly sad!! I am feeling sick right now...I Did not eat anything today i went through school being hungry...An then i ate dinner and now i feel horrible. I have been put on the IBS food list diet and it seems to have helped a little bit but the stress and anxiety is making my symptoms worse. I am deathly afraid of riding my bus and having to go to school. Afraid that i will have to use the bathroom. I just dont know what to do at all. I meen im 16 its hard to deal with something that is destroying my life. That i will have for the rest of my life and me being so young. I dont know how to deal with it. I dont know what to do. I am seeing a gastro- doctor. and shes administering alot of diffrent tests. Going to school is hard. Classrooms are warm witch then sometimes triggers an ibs attack and i get a crazy bad heat flass like im standing on the surface of the sun..Being hot makes my stomach turn and twirl and twist and makes me need to use the batroom ALOT. i can not use the bathroom more then once in a classroom and being new to my teachers i dont want to explain why i cant hold it like a normal person. I am afraid that one day i may soil myself. I am afraid what people think of me seeing me use the bathroom more then once. and i feel ashamed. I just dont know how to deal with it. I dont understand why i am so young an have this. It makes me so so so sad.Having to deal with stress at my fathers makes it worse. i do school then have to work then cook dinner and then he wants me to clean, and if i dont clean i am grounded. I dont know why he cant understand how terrible this syndrome is...is there anyone out there i can talk to? advice? Please!


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## Eowyne (Apr 28, 2011)

Oh sweetheart how awful for you!!! I felt the same when I was diagnosed, a syndrome that's incurable??? What?! I am an IBS C sufferer (I get chronic constipation and then about 3 days worth of attacks). I'm guessing that what you have is IBS D (diarrhea). I get hot flashes too, in fact when I have an attack I feel like I have the flu untill I go to the toilet. It's sudden, its swift and its incredibly draining. If you are havng attacks like this at school then DON'T try to hold it please...because in the end you may well soil yourself and that is not something you want to happen obviously. I suggest that next time you see your Doctor you talk to her about this and tell her how sudden and awful the attacks are. She may be forgetting that she's dealing with someone who is still in school and whose toilet trips are regulated. Perhaps you can get her to write a letter to your school explaining the situation in a confidetial manner so that someone high up in the educational staff of the school can say to your teachers "Should Demolishing-Dezz need to go to the bathroom at any point during a lesson she can go, I can't tell you why but she must go." Perhaps, you can even sort out a situation where you don't even have to ask (because that could waste precious time, especially if the teachers busy). People *will* notice that you need to use the bathroom more than anybody else and if they ask you can say anything you want. You don't have to tell them you have IBS, you could make them feel ashamed for asking by saying you have a serious condition that requires meds every time you feel pain and it has nothing to do with the bathroom you just can't inject you're meds in front of the classroom - I don't advocate lying but I also know how easy it is to make yourself a target in school. Tell them anything you want seriously...I know you're new and you want desperately to be normal but I'm afraid IBS means being different and you're going to have to come to terms with that. Now about your family, I know it's embaressing talking about it but like everyone out there who doesn't have IBS - THEY HAVE NO IDEA!!! There are a lot of misconceptions about IBS, my own boyfriend didn't even have a clue for the first three years of our relationship because he just assumed it meant I had the runs a lot and I was too embarassed to tell him any different because he used to make fun of me. It wasn't untill I developed Irritable bladder syndrome (a direct result of IBS) that he bothered to ask me about IBS because he was so shocked that it had caused another problem with my body. (by the way Irritable bladder syndrome is not something that every IBS sufferer gets don't worry and I beleive, although I don't know, that IBS C sufferers are more prone to it.) It's up to you to sit down with your mum and explain what you are going through, she is your mother and she loves you!!! As soon as she understands the drastic changes in your life that this is causing I'm sure she will do anything in her power to help you. It may be embaressing to talk about bowel movements but this is serious and it's not going to go away!!! You NEED emotional support and you have every right to ask for it. Perhaps in this conversation to your mum you could mention what the stress your father is causing does to your condition. Now having IBS doesn't get you out of doing chores and don't make it look like thats what you're trying to do because it will make your syndrome less credible but do mention that you can't do it all! Anyway I've droned on forever so I'll wrap it up - I'm 23 and I've had IBS since I was 18 years of age. The doctors tell you food elimination works but it hasn't for me yet (I hope sincerely that it does for you!) I take 6 pills a day to control it and there is never a loo around when you need one lol. I understand what you're going through and I promise it will get better once you have emotional support, medical support and hopefully find out what food is disagreeing with your body. Chin up X x


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## s.m. (Sep 2, 2011)

dear i have ibsc for 5 yers and i cry daily....i wish i can die....have tried cmmiting suicide twice but was saved...i cnt live wd this miserable cndtion....


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

s.m. and all others feeling the same.. PLEASE seek professional Mental Health help. Call a crisis number and get help. IBS can have a major impact on one's life BUT it isn't worth ending one's gift of life over.


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## Nicolas (Sep 3, 2011)

BQ said:


> s.m. and all others feeling the same.. PLEASE seek professional Mental Health help. Call a crisis number and get help. IBS can have a major impact on one's life BUT it isn't worth ending one's gift of life over.


+1Demolishing-Dezz,When I started having intestines problems (I was 15 years old), it was so bad sometimes that I had to stay home from school.Ended up staying home like 1 day every 2 weeks. A year later, I had to stay home 1 day a week.A year later.. I missed 1/3rd of my school year total in sick days. (luckily I had no problem keeping up with school work & doing tests).I was also feeling tired all the time & of course had a lot of intestines pain.A year later was even worse, much worse. It was found out that I've also got a barely active thyroid, which could of course cause the fatigue.After months of being on the right dosage of pills to replace the thyroid function, tests revealed that everything was ok & that my fatigue etc should go away.Of course, it didn't. Later on, I was diagnosed with chronical fatigue syndrome.I missed 95% of that year, which was my senior year. I was depressed & on medication for it, also seeing a therapist.Meanwhile, my intestines problems had even gotten worse. I've had 2 gastroscopies & 1 colonoscopie over the past years & numerous other tests for it.Nothing 'bad' was ever revealed. I was merely.. diagnosed with IBS (already diagnosed with that years ago btw).I've been on IBS medication for years now though & they barely help.Eventually, my mother wanted me to go to a doctor who is also a homeopath (so, alternative health thingys).He listened to my entire story & said that what I had are food allergics & because I've been eating normally (avoiding some types of foods of course),he said my intestine got damaged & small particles could go into my body which then my liver picked up.He said that that is the reason why my liver is fatter than normal (this was revealed in one of those earlier tests), which can also cause fatigue etc.So, he wanted to do a Vega-test on me.(What is the Vega machine or Vega test?The apparatus consists of a box containing a galvanometer which compares the resistance between the skin in contact with a hand electrode and the skin tested with a measuring stylus. The other contents of the box are an electrical source.Proponents claim; "Over 120 substances which include common foods and drinks and environmental substances are tested during our consultation. The equipment we use is a bio-electronic analyzer which measures the body's electrical resistance to these substances. If a substance is causing a problem then it there will be a dip or drop in body's electrical resistance".)So basically, he could test which foods I was allergic for. We did the test & apparently at that moment, I was allergic to:Garlic, chocolate, yeast, milk, citrusfruits, grapes & bananas.He claimed if I stop eating those, I should feel better in 3 months time & in 6 months time I should have no problems at all because my intestine would have'repaired' itself. I would be able to start eating everything again but milk.I was kinda sceptical and asked why no other doctor had wanted to do this test.He said it has to do with the fact that IBS medication makes corporates so much money that they've pressurised health commisions etc & that that's the reason why it's not known at all with most doctors.He also claimed that atleast 70% of the people suffering from IBS, would be cured by finding out what they're allergic from & then taking on a strict diet.I've been on my diet for two months now & don't feel better (yet?).I'm not putting my hopes into this, but who knows, it might help.It's not like a real doctor who also happens to be a homeopath, will lie to your face about something that could help you, right?As for acceptance from your parents...My father has gotten a masters degree in being an ###### on that part.My mother on the other hand is very accepting. If I were you, I'd discuss it with your mother about how to 'change' your dad's mind about this.If that won't help, it might help going to the doctors with him who then could explain it to him.I know it's really difficult having this problem on school, I felt totally the same way you are feeling right now.However, you'd be surprised how accepting your friends could be. If they wouldn't accept it (which I doubt), they don't deserve to be your friend anyway, am I right? Perhaps you should consider getting that Vega-test, you never know it'll help. You may think you're avoiding all things you think you are allergic to, but believe me, I thought the same thing. (a lot of the vega test results seemed to be correct for me, since when I drunk any type of alcohol, it'd cause me problems, so wine = grapes, beer = yeast, also had major problems with bananas & of course milk, all the other things are 'new' to me)Anyways, I hope I could help some. Nicolas


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## ERC399 (Sep 3, 2011)

Hello.... I just wanted you to know that I was in your boat at one time long ago. My symptoms started in HS when I was 17 when my parents were divorcing. I got panic attacks at school and would stress out about having to use the restroom all of the time and this would trigger it. I know how it feels to be embarrassed and ashamed. I am a homebody now because of it. What i don't want for you is what I have been doing to myself all of these years. i am about to be 29 and am still living in constant fear of having to use the public bathroom which triggers so much stress and anxiety that my stomach begins to hurt and well you know the rest! My worst fear comes true and then the next day I live in this never ending cycle. I have become antisocial and have excluded myself from lots of things! I'm addicted to Imodium. It sometimes is my best friend but coming down off Imodium has given me the worst pains in my life too but I count it worth it if I'm able to enjoy one day of fun and freedom out with my family. I know how it felt to be at school and feel soooo embarrassed because kids are cruel. And lets face it, barrooms at school are horrid! So here is some advice that I will give you to hopefully make it better until you can change your diet and find out the root of your IBS.1. Find a teacher you can trust! Just one teacher on your side. It will make a world of a difference. My food and nutrition teacher (ironic) was my go to teacher. I had 2 classes with him one reg class and one TA class. I also went to his class for study periods. He always let me out without question! 2. Find a bathroom that not many students use and make the trip to that bathroom whenever you have to go. I had one bathroom that was rarely ever used in my school and I would walk to it no matter how far. If a proctor stopped me I would just be honest and most of the time they don't question it. You could even carry a doctors note stating your issues.3. Pack lunches NEVER eat cafeteria food. Never drink soda always water! I even stay away from food coloring in drinks like Gatorade. 4. Tale some imodium on days when it's really bad but DO NOT TAKE EVERYDAY! Don't become addicted or reliant on them like me. It's a terrible cycle! 5. Eat breakfast once at school. This way your tummy is empty on your way to school so no mishaps on the bus. Also don't even drink yet until you get to school where a bathroom is present. Also don't drink while eating. Drink after. 6. Talk to your school nurse. They have bathrooms in the nurses office you can use. Just go there every time. Don't be embarrassed by the nurse if you frequent it. She is there because she understands these types of things. You can always get a doctors note to excuse you in class to go to the nurses office. 7. Show a doctors note stating you need to frequently use the restroom to your teachers. Just show it to them. Don't explain details so you wont feel embarrassed. 8. Find one friend you can trust about this to support you while you are at school. 9. Drink lots of water throughout the day. 10. Try not to stress out. Hope these things help!! These are the things I did when at school and it helped. I did miss a few days of school and when it's really bad just stay home. Good luck sweetie and I hope you gain control soon! Stay proactive to getting better! Don't give up or give in. I would hate to see you 29 like me and still dealing with it!


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## Ohiomom (Sep 3, 2011)

Hey there. . . . Please don't give up. My son is also 16 and has had the same issues as you have. His school has been a Godsend to us. Once he was diagnosed, they helped us SOOOO much. You can get a permanent bathroom pass (no questions asked), your desk can be moved to the closest exit from the room, etc. etc.The exact law I am not sure of but there are many, many resources available to help you with high school.Remember, high school is temporary. VERY temporary and you will be much more relieved once you gradutate and you will!!!!!Chris (A Mom who KNOWS what you're going through.)


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## livinglifel:) (Sep 19, 2011)

I to cry everyday and I think about committing suicide all the time because people don't understand


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

livinglifelYOU NEED HELP. Call a crisis number. Here is our Crisis Information:http://www.ibsgroup.org/forums/topic/71753-crisis-resources/


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## Kylepa (Mar 5, 2011)

Please see Baking Soda" note, dated Nov 8, under Your Story topic, which may help you relieve some of your symptoms. The baking soda will minimize or alleviate your abdominal cramps and help you get back your life! Apples at night and something hot (even just hot water and lemon) first thing in the morning will give you regular bowel movements. This will help prevent your stomach from getting acidity which often triggers an IBS episode. Sipping on soda water during the day will keep your body PH around 7.0, which it needs to be to prevent the IBS episodes. If talking about bowel movements is the worst embarrassment you'll have in your life, I think you'll be ok. Supposedly, about 20% of the general population has some kind of IBS -- it's just not general dinner conversation. Also, whenever you read about someone getting " food poisoning" at dinner, it's usually a case of IBS.Anyway, hope these hints help you as much as they do me. Please let me know your results and if positive, feel free to share the info with someone else. Best of Luck.Kylepa/Phoenix, Az


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## Bridget_12 (Dec 5, 2011)

Hello, I'm 16 too and I have a lot of the same problems. I'd like to give some advice about what you should do on the account of your teachers only giving you one bathroom break. I actually dealt with this in just the past week. I hate having to always beg my teachers to let me go for what seemed everyday and during each class period. I also had to ask during a time when the teacher wasn't talking, which didn't help. I finally decided that I couldn't take it anymore. I myself am quiet embarrassed about all of this and would probably die if I faced my teachers and said, "Hey, guess what, I have this thing call Irritable Bowel Syndrome where my insides don't digest food right and it makes noises and I have to go to the bathroom every hour." With that said, there was no way on Earth that I was going to do that. I asked my mom if she could talk to my teachers. She emailed them and told them about what I had and what it did. She explained that I needed to sometimes use the bathroom right away. Now that my teachers know why I'm begging to go to the bathroom in the middle of class everyday, I no longer get yelled at for interrupting or told no. It's a little embarrassing knowing that they know I have IBS, but you know what, when push comes to shove, I'm only going to be hanging around that school another couple years, who cares that they know. Just send an email to your teachers about what is going on. Have a parent or somebody send it. Weight the facts. Embarrass yourself by telling your teacher what's up or embarrass yourself when you can't control your insides and then everybody knows you have something wrong with you. Quiet frankly, the first one is more appealing than the other. I suppose this is our life's test, who can handle the embarrassment that we will get no matter what we do and who can't handle the embarrassment.If you want another tip, lie.







I've done it a bunch of times. If it's embarrassing to admit to somebody who doesn't really need to know that you have IBS, make up some random stuff. My younger cousin heard my stomach make those weird noises and he asked what it was. I told him I had a tumor in my colon and he kind of believed it. Probably wasn't the nicest thing to tell him, but at least I got a pretty good laugh out of it -which I probably wouldn't have got if I had told him it was IBS.


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## SarahLund (Aug 16, 2010)

Hi. I'm sorry that your father doesn't believe you have it. I must admit, when i read that bit, it made me feel slightly frustrated for you. My stepfather makes life a trial at times. He is very selfish. We all have to live our life for him in our family. Honestly, his nine year old daughter is more grown up than he is. Oooops, sorry for ranting on. lol. I got my dr to write me a note to show teachers. I used the same one everytime. My symptoms feel worse whenever i have my menstrual cycle. Not sure this is the type of illness where you can afford to worry about your pride. Cos if you're gonna worry about what someone thinks of your bathroom visits, then you'll be holding it in, thus making yourself more ill. Just think, we all die one day, so what anyone thinks of your illness shouldn't matter. I know pride can create a barrier between doing the right thing, or risk your health just cos one may judge.


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## spr444 (Sep 19, 2011)

Demolishing-Dezz said:


> I need help. I need someone to talk to. Someone that knows what i am going through..I have had IBS for a couple months now. It is just recently getting bad. I talk to my mom about my IBS but its embarrassing. I am so embarrassed by what i have, I know that its not my fault but it still makes me terribly sad!! I am feeling sick right now...I Did not eat anything today i went through school being hungry...An then i ate dinner and now i feel horrible. I have been put on the IBS food list diet and it seems to have helped a little bit but the stress and anxiety is making my symptoms worse. I am deathly afraid of riding my bus and having to go to school. Afraid that i will have to use the bathroom. I just dont know what to do at all. I meen im 16 its hard to deal with something that is destroying my life. That i will have for the rest of my life and me being so young. I dont know how to deal with it. I dont know what to do. I am seeing a gastro- doctor. and shes administering alot of diffrent tests. Going to school is hard. Classrooms are warm witch then sometimes triggers an ibs attack and i get a crazy bad heat flass like im standing on the surface of the sun..Being hot makes my stomach turn and twirl and twist and makes me need to use the batroom ALOT. i can not use the bathroom more then once in a classroom and being new to my teachers i dont want to explain why i cant hold it like a normal person. I am afraid that one day i may soil myself. I am afraid what people think of me seeing me use the bathroom more then once. and i feel ashamed. I just dont know how to deal with it. I dont understand why i am so young an have this. It makes me so so so sad.Having to deal with stress at my fathers makes it worse. i do school then have to work then cook dinner and then he wants me to clean, and if i dont clean i am grounded. I dont know why he cant understand how terrible this syndrome is...is there anyone out there i can talk to? advice? Please!


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## emma707 (Jan 18, 2012)

Aww honey! I'm 17 and I know exactly how you feel! I'll give you with all the details of my story now but you can read it in the my story section under the title 'my IBS rollercoaster in high school!' - it's quite similar to yours. I used to cry multiple times daily and feel so ashamed when I left the class to leave the classroom, especially when I had to go out more than once during a class! I was so embarrassed and I feared school, even had a phobia of it, for years! I've found that by telling my teachers discreetly about it, things have got a whole lot easier. I don't feel trapped in class now because I know that my teachers are fine with me getting up and walking out to go to the bathroom any time I need to, even if they're talking. Usually my class-mates don't even notice me quietly leaving and coming back again. I also get a private exam room to sit my exams with bathrooms close-by so I don't have to deal with the stress of sitting in a huge hall filled with 300 students doing exams all around me. Even the idea of that situation fills me with fear! I know how you feel regarding your father as well - my parents refuse to acknowledge I have anything wrong with me and are convinced that I made the whole IBS thing up to get out of going to school







It sucks to have parents who don't understand


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## Mona Jean (Jan 20, 2012)

I so feel for you. I thought 27 was so young ( I am 50 now)......My heart goes out to you.... I put my story into a blog.... here let your parents see it..... this was my life line....(Edited out hyperlink: TOS violation)You will be ok.....


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## fedup01 (Jan 24, 2012)

Hi There,I'm pretty new to all of this too. I have two girls 12 and 14. In my experience with teens, I would have to say give your classmates a chance. It's embarrassing because it's a secret. Maybe if your classmates new of your condition, it would take the mystery and the shame away. There is no shame in having an illness. I think most kids would be understanding. Maybe try talking to your guidance counsellors first and they can help you bring this out with some of the staff. From there it's possible for the students to comprehend and have compassion for your condition. I don't know, I think the more open you are the better you will feel about what you have. It's not your fault, it's nothing to be embarassed about, and who knows you might stand to help educate your classmates on the illness and compassion for the people who suffer with this and other illnesses. I know it sounds impossible...but please consider it. It may help you feel better to know that the people around you care. All the best to youfedup001


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## Brittany123 (Jan 27, 2012)

Well i dont know if you care, but i am 13 and i have had ibs for 3 years i know what your going through and it is embarrassing. But somehow your gonna have to come through the embarrassment and realize that one day it is going to stop, and i was just saying this because i know how it feels to have ibs, and i also just started this website to, so i hope one day you become well


Demolishing-Dezz said:


> I need help. I need someone to talk to. Someone that knows what i am going through..I have had IBS for a couple months now. It is just recently getting bad. I talk to my mom about my IBS but its embarrassing. I am so embarrassed by what i have, I know that its not my fault but it still makes me terribly sad!! I am feeling sick right now...I Did not eat anything today i went through school being hungry...An then i ate dinner and now i feel horrible. I have been put on the IBS food list diet and it seems to have helped a little bit but the stress and anxiety is making my symptoms worse. I am deathly afraid of riding my bus and having to go to school. Afraid that i will have to use the bathroom. I just dont know what to do at all. I meen im 16 its hard to deal with something that is destroying my life. That i will have for the rest of my life and me being so young. I dont know how to deal with it. I dont know what to do. I am seeing a gastro- doctor. and shes administering alot of diffrent tests. Going to school is hard. Classrooms are warm witch then sometimes triggers an ibs attack and i get a crazy bad heat flass like im standing on the surface of the sun..Being hot makes my stomach turn and twirl and twist and makes me need to use the batroom ALOT. i can not use the bathroom more then once in a classroom and being new to my teachers i dont want to explain why i cant hold it like a normal person. I am afraid that one day i may soil myself. I am afraid what people think of me seeing me use the bathroom more then once. and i feel ashamed. I just dont know how to deal with it. I dont understand why i am so young an have this. It makes me so so so sad.Having to deal with stress at my fathers makes it worse. i do school then have to work then cook dinner and then he wants me to clean, and if i dont clean i am grounded. I dont know why he cant understand how terrible this syndrome is...is there anyone out there i can talk to? advice? Please!


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## Brittany123 (Jan 27, 2012)

im not getting in to any of your personal life but i think that you just have to think about how if you end your life now your not going to be able to live it out. And how bout if your is disapears in not even a month you will fight this out and you cant worry about not getting better, you have to tell yourself that one day you will becom better, and you will have a good life.









livinglifel:) said:


> I to cry everyday and I think about committing suicide all the time because people don't understand


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