# Brain Fog and Depression



## Cartoon Creature

Hey Everyone,I am so scared that I have let my mental health get to out of control. I now suffer from brain fog and insomnia. I feel like I am loosing my grip on reality and that I am going crazy. My tinnitus and IBS are at thier worst and I am scared to death I may not get my normal self back again. I know I can not live this may much longer.I have taken steps to get help i.e. seen my GP, filled in a mental health plan and have an appointment to see a psychologist. I am hoping she will give me antidepressants (never thought id say that) and that she will be the answer to my problems. I dont know what else to do. I havent slept in about 2.5 months, I cry several times a day, I am behind in uni and will prob fail cause I cant concentrate and read properly. I cut myself and have suicidal thoughts nearly every day. I have confessed all these things to the GP, but with the way our health system works I only have two options. 1. wait for the psych appointment or 2. get admitted to hospital. The problem is i need the help of the second option but being admitted to hospital and having to defer uni would plumit me MUCH further into my depression.I have no idea how to help myself between now and when I start feeling better. I feel like I have taken all the steps I can to get help, but I am scared the help may not come fast enough and also that the help may not help at all. I am scared this brain fog and insomnia are perminate. I couldnt live that way.I dont know if im saying all this to hear about your stories and how you coped or if im crying out for help..... maybe its both. One very scared ans lost Poo Pea


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## Cartoon Creature

I have been reading up on depression, and I suffer from pretty much everything under it. I have looked up a few antidepressants and thier side effects are the symptoms of depression.


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## 19596

im no expert myself but im suffering bad atm to bad thoughts were in my head cant leave the house panic attacks in the hse and now huge phobia of food linked back to ibsas for reading side effects of everything thats not always a good idea as i personal willl then convince myself im gonna get them or if ive got them already they will make it a million times worsedont knock antidepressants until your gp has tried you on some i get so scared of new pills but it has took me only 3 types to try and the third i seem fine on been on 2 weeks now so still early days but made me no iller councelling is supposed to be good my pychiatrist appointment was taking to long so there trying to get me in with a pcycologist which are supposed to be just as goodmy main prob is not eating and now vomiting as i have lost 4 stone since xmas and if i dont improve soon i to will be admitted to hospital and prob tube fed and as ive had bad experiences in our hospital i really dont want to go there again let me know how your doing there is hope for all of us somewhere we just have to find it


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## Tonya Kay

Poo pea, Please don't be sad, I can't say that I understand what you are going through because I think we all suffer at different extremes and in different ways. When are you going to be able to get in for a visit? If you PCP isn't concerned with your emotional state you need seek another opioion. After reading you bio I was very concerned and wished that I could reach through the computer and give you a hug or be a shoulder to cry on.


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## Guest

Oh bless you - listen if you are really having suicidal thoughts every day - I would say, that, just for the moment - the safest place for you would be in hospital - they are not lovely places (I've been in one) but it sounds like you need a lot of support just at the moment. You'd be amazed, in the great scheme of things, how quickly you start on the uphill mental-health wise - it took 6 weeks for me.All the best to youSue xxx


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## Jannybitt

Poo Pea;What Sue said is very good advice!! University will be there; it's not going anywhere. If you had to defer, then so be it! I want to tell you that I hear you crying out for help!! I can hear it in your words. My daughter was in a major depression three years ago, and she was cutting. She had a suicidal plan, and by the Grace of God, she had an appt. with her therapist that day, and she got it out of my daughter her plan. She went into the hospital that day. To make a long story short, she was able to get the help she needed, and three years later, I have a daughter who is turning 16 in a couple of weeks; that looks forward to things in her life, and is a relatively normal teenager. She takes medication as we found out that she is bi-polar; it keeps her moods steady, she sees her therapist, and I have my daughter!! There is nothing more important than your health and wellbeing. You could make that one cut that could turn fatal!! You could take that one extra pill that would do it!


> quote: The problem is i need the help of the second option but being admitted to hospital and having to defer uni would plumit me MUCH further into my depression.


 University is not more important than your life. If you die, what would it have meant?How long do you have to wait for the psych appt? It sounds like a day is too long!! Please take this seriously. I lost my sister to depression, and almost lost my daughter. I have been in my own depression, deep enough that I can relate to what you are feeling. If you are behind in uni and are probably going to fail, as you said, I would be walking in the door to that hospital and be admitted!! I know that is the scariest thought, but look how fast you would get the help you need. You getting better is THE most important thing. You said yourself


> quote:I know I can not live this way much longer.


 We are here for you, but you have to decide for yourself what to do. If you are scared the help may not come fast enough, ACT!! I'm praying for you, and this board is here so you can share if you need to. This is the best advice I can give you from someone who KNOWS!! And Sue KNOWS!!! Please hear us!


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## Cartoon Creature

Thank you for your replies!!!!I have an appointment with the psych on the 10th of March, and I went and saw the uni psych yesterday. I think the 10th of march is to far away I really need help now, but im afraid of the implications of that.I am scared of so many things, what will happen to me, what will ppl think, will i ever get better. I need help so bad but im scared of asking for anymore help than i already have. I feel like such a failure at life and I dont want others to know it too. What if everyone thinks im weird and leaves me, ill be all alone. I dont want to be alone. Im scared to be any more alone than i already amI wonder if i should walk into the GP and ask for antidepressants...... maybe antidepressants are the answer. Will they get rid of the brain fog and pressure in my head, will they allow me to sleep.Oh my god what do i do. I want to scream HELP ME, HELP ME, HELP ME, but then im to scared to do it.What is happening to me, im so scared


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## 21185

Poo PeaI so sorry you are down. Have you thought about getting a full-blood workup and include a thyroid panel with that.Sometimes our chemistry gets out of whack because of stress, dietary, etc.I'm not saying anti-depressants are bad. I use them myself and might for the rest of my life based on my diagnosis. Most people with my type of depression have medication, in my research I've done, for the rest of your life.Counseling is great and if you can get a doc's note for uni--it might help get them off your back, alleviate some stress for you. Even if you need some time off, you can always make up a semester.Remember to take care of yourself and sending ((((hugs)))) your way.


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## Jannybitt

YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE!!!! You need help, but that does not mean you are a failure. I can relate to that because I have said the same thing. I am only an online support, but I will NOT leave you. You can private message me, if you want my email, I will give it to you; if you need my phone number so you can talk, I will give it to you in the private message. Can you hear the promise in my post?!! I mean it! You are not a failure if you walk into the hospital!! You would be a success because you took that step!! You are not a failure because you posted what you felt on here! You are a success because you took that step!! Hang ON!!DO NOT give up!! Sometimes when my daughter has gone to some fun activity, and she comes back and tells me what a blast she had, or when she gets a new baby cousin, I remind her of what she would've missed if she had gone through with her plan. There are good things ahead, and the fog and the pressure and the depression and the sadness and despair can be taken care of if you get the help you need. If you can't hang on until the 10th, GO!! Walk into the hospital, and you will get immediate help, just like Sue said. Remember, Poo Pea, we are here for you!!! I am here for you!!!


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## Guest

See you are not alone - mental illness is scarey but as Jan has said it needn't be more than a temporary state - things were so, so dreadful last year and each time I do something great I think "my god, but I so nearly wasn't there" - just like Jan said about her daughter.You have taken the first important step by admitting that something is very wrong. Anti-depressants may be the answer, hospitalisation (albeit for a week/ 2 weeks whatever) may be too but doing nothing and internalising all this certainly isn't.You hang in there and get talking - there are professionals who can help you - I promise - things will get better than this - they have for me and they have for Janny's daughter too.God blessSue xxx


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey Everyone,Thanks for all your support!! Im still to scared to go to the hospital but I did ring the university and schedule an appointment with their psych today. I told them how bad things were getting and they seemed concerned and sqeezed me in. I know they cant prescribe anything but im hoping may a chat with an undertsanding, non-judgemental ear might help a little bit. I can only hope.My emotions seems to go up and down all day. One minute im on the floor in tears feeling clostraphobic in my own skin and that I must kill myself cause i cant deal with this anymore..... it will last for about 30min to 3 hours and then obviously i dont kill myself and I end up lying there feeling helpless, lonley and defeated. Also noramlly i am a very calm and ahve all the patience in the world but latley the smallest thing will make me angrey and cry. Just the other day I cried because i didnt have enough change to print off an assignment, someone was driving to slow in front of me and cause I tripped on the stairs.I am really really really scared of going to hospital or ending up in greylands. I am truely hoping I can get the help i need from psychs, family, tablets and friends. I was thinking I would try and go to the uni psych whilst I wait for my other psych appointment, just to feel like i am getting some help and that someone proffessional knows whats going on.Depression and anxiety are AWEFUL, i wouldnt wish it on anyone. The things you do and the thoughts that go through your mind are scary and truely aweful. Im doing a degree in occuaptional therapy and have decided that if I manage to get through this I want to specialise in mental health, i dont want anyone to have to experience this, and if they do i want to help. Im hoping is a positive thing that im looking into the future..... my future.Poo PeaP.S. I am sorry if I continue to post and my messages seem to be all over the place, its kinda how I feel, completley scattered. Maybe one day I will look back on this and see what my journay was to overcome depression I HOPE.


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## Jannybitt

That you are talking about the future is a great sign!! We can be here for you and making an appt. to get in to talk to someone before the 10th was a great step, but if you feel in the slightest way that you're going to hurt yourself-STOP!!!!!!!!Go right to the hospital, ok????!!!I have a suggestion you could do....tomorrow, post 3 GOOD things that happened in your day on here. If you have to do something that is good so you'll have it to post, then do it!!







If you wrote that you've wanted to clean your bathroom and haven't been motivated at all to do it, clean your bathroom! That's a good thing. If you have plants and they need watering and pruning back, do it. If you need to laugh, find something on the internet that cracks you up!!!







If you do nothing more than walk outside for a little while and see something pretty to post, do it!! 3 things!! Can you do it? I think you can. Will you do it? I hope you will!!! Did you just smile a little tiny smile? I'm praying you just did!







I'll be checking on here for your three things!


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## Cartoon Creature

Thank you so much Jannybitt for you supportI like your suggest.... and I did smile when i read it







My three good things are1. I managed to get through a chapter in my text book and take notes2. I was able to concentrate and sit in my lecture this morning and can remember 70% of what was said3. I found a rental property I like and applied for itI am really proud of myself for the first two, its more than i have been able to do in ages. I think its because im finally getting sleep with some sleeping pills.Poo Pea


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## Guest

Sounds very positive Poo Pea - you are NOT as down as you think - believe me - when I was in the depths of depression - I was thrilled if I managed to get myself dressed and eat 3 meals - so power to you and well done Jan for some very sound, practical advice.Sue


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## Jannybitt

Way to go Poo Pea!!!Job well done! You should be very proud of yourself!!! I would have a hard time sitting through a lecture being in a fantastic mood!







Very good for you!!!And, you found a rental property you like? Awesome! Tell us about it! What made you like it?Hmmm.... maybe I should have come up with 5 things for you to think of good!







Got two more you could come up with, by chance? Hugs to you!!!


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## Cartoon Creature

I guess my 'problem'is rather odd. I believe i have a cross between anxiety and depression brought on by stress. Which is why I have always been rather hesitant about taking anti-depressants.If my life is going along like normal then I have no problems.... not even a hint of sadness or depression. But when I have to many stressful things happen at once I simply cant cope and I get sadder and sadder each day until finally I have a depression/anxiety attack. This is what will last 30min - 3hours where I want to kill myself, cut, cant move, wont move and cry till the cows come home. I can have 4-5 of these in one day. Thanks for the positive words JannyI like the rental because it is a 4 brm and all the rooms are double sized so it mean I can rent the other rooms really easy, I also like it cause it has air con. I find out today if I get it.... i am REALLY hoping I do cause ive been looking for 2months. The property market is HELL in Perth. I dont know if you've heard about it butyeah....Another 2 good things1. I got through 2 readings for uni (felt very ill at the end though) but i did it2. I cant think of a second good thing, if i get the property it will be my 2nd good thing!!Poo Pea


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## Jannybitt

I hope you got the rental!! I really do, but if you don't, something will come along even better. It might take time, but something will find you!I know you're afraid of antidepressants, but it almost sounds like you cycle with your moods. A good psychiatrist or psychologist will be able to determine what you need and it might be a combo of antidepressant and a mood stabilizer. That is what my daughter takes. Evens the moods out. When she gets stressed, she has a hard time functioning also. Sometimes, I just have to talk her through it. Especially around her cycle time. Whoa!!







Keep hanging in there! You are doing it; do you realize that it's almost the 7th? We're making it! The 10th is just around the corner! You can do this!!! We'll keep posting and be the best support we can be, and you just do the best you can do and no one can expect more from you than that. If they do, tell them to go to..... well, you know where!







Hugs to you, Sweetie!!!


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey,I didnt get the rental property. Didnt think i would to be honest. Now in about 1 week i will be homeless. I have dug a massive hole and have no idea how to get out of it.This sux


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## evulienka

Hey Poo Pee ! I donÂ´t know much about your situation but when I read the word homeless I was shocked . I feel sorry for you I want to ask isnÂ´t there any other possibility for you ? For example to stay at you friendsÂ´ or some family members at least till you find something on your own? I am really sorry that you are going through such difficult times.


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## Nanobug

> quote:I havent slept in about 2.5 months


This alone could explain *ALL* of your mental problems. Do you have access to melatonin in Australia?


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## Cartoon Creature

Evulienka - my ex boyfriend offered up the spare room at his house yesterday, saying that if things get to the point where i have no where else to go i can stay at his. So I am relieved to have somewhere to go but on the flip side i guess its not really the most healthy or ideal place to go.Nanobug - your right! the lack of sleep at the moment is the driving force behind my problems.... i think i do have some issues on the side, but under normal circumstances i can handel those. Fore the last 5 nights i have been taking sleeping pills and sleeping on a mattress on the floor in the family room where the air con is, i have managed to sleep everynight (waking a few times)and each day I can feel the brain fog lifting a bit more.I have never heard of melatonin.... whats that? If it helps sleep im very interested to know more about it.Sometimes life and the world can seem very overwhelming.....


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## Cherrie

Hi, Poo Pea, I just saw this... I'm so sorry you're going through such a difficult time... Hugs... Everyone who's posted has had some really good suggestions. I totally agree with Nanobug that sleeplessness alone can cause realy bad depression and brain fog. I searched the Internet and found the following sites about melatonin:http://www.melatonin.com/http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Melatoninhttp://www.umm.edu/altmed/ConsSupplements/Melatonincs.htmlBasically it is a hormone that a normal functioning body would naturally produce to regulate sleep -- when it gets dark it informs the body that it is time to sleep. I also read it somewhere that it is most effective for people whose sleep patterns have been disrupted for some reason and it does help them to get back to a healthier pattern. I wish I could find that link that someone posted for me a month or so ago in the lounge... I'll try and see if I could find it for you.It's so painful not being able to sleep... i'm glad that the sleeping pills are working for you now... and mean time you might want to check out those websites and see if melatonin will work for you.Hope you feel a little better...


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## Cherrie

P.s. to my previous post --Here, I found it! If you scroll down, the table there evaluates its effectiveness on different causes of insomnia:http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/druginf...-melatonin.htmlAnd the site explains everything pretty thoroughly, including Background, Synonyms, Evidence, Dosing, Safety, Interactions, Methodology, and even references to other articles.Hope this could be of some help...


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## Jannybitt

Poo Pea;I'm sorry you didn't get the rental you really wanted. Have you completely exhausted your search or is there other places you can check? Look at that; PP, you are just 2 days away from your appt!! You're almost there! Pat yourself on the back for that. And tell them your whole situation including not having a place to be in a week. They may be able to help you with that.You get get melatonin in the health food store, but don't count on the effects to work right away. It has to build up in your system. Right now, with you being in such a bad way, talk to your doctor about that not you're not sleeping and tell him/her what you're taking to sleep. Write everything down before you go when you head is not as foggy, so you won't have to rely on your memory when you're in there. You will be great!! We'll get ya through! Just 2 more days!!Big hug to you {{{{{{{{{{{{{PP}}}}}}}}}}}}}


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## 21185

Poo Pea:I've kind of been in your situation about 5 years ago after leaving abuse. Luckily, I had a friend and her husband (but it got complicated) and honestly it's very hard on a friendship.There are "safe houses" that are offered by community service facilities in the city you are in. They give you a place to stay until you can get on your own. I believe you have to meet qualifications and that they have openings, etc.I was looking at that alley, too and it's lonely, scarey, and hopeless for today. But tomorrow is a new day with new plans for you.Take care of yourself.


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey Everyone,Egbert I am so sorry to hear that happened to you. I am glad things are back on track for you now. I am worried about putting strain on friendships too!Well I had my psych appointment today whilst it was good it didnt quite go to plan. It tok a while to get started becasue ive never really done anything like this before, at first we talked about my ex who isnt entirley my ex and then we moved onto family stuff..... well that just opened a can of worms for me and for the next 45min i just ranted on and on about things. So the good thing is it felt good to finally say some of these things, the bad thing is i got so caught up in talking that i didnt manage to ask her what i should do "right now" to help my situation.My position now is that i am feeling a bit better because i have had sleep for the last 5 nights by sleeping on floor in family room and using sleeping pills,but i cant do that for ever. I will need to get off the pills.Maybe thats how psych sessions work, just talking to start with, sussing each other out??? The thing is i cant get to see her again until the 24th march now. Maybe i should converse with my GP too, maybe he is the one i talk to about medication and pills and the psych i just talk too and learn how to deal with things. Hmmm maybe things did go well at the psych.Anywho I am activley trying to destress, talk to myself when i can feel panic start to rise. It doesnt work all the time, but it has worked a few times... which i think is good. I didnt realise just how stressed I was about everything, even the smallest of things that i didnt need to be stressed about.I applied for another house today and will find out on monday if i get it. I have my fingers crossed again. I am terrified i wont find a place in time.Poo Pea







P.S. Have i said thank you to everyone...... cause if i havent I would like too. THANK YOU, thank you from deep within my heart














, it is because of you that I am getting through this


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## evulienka

Poo Pee ~ IÂ´ve never had a psych appointment but donÂ´t worry about it. I guess she knows what to do and after a few appointments you will feel much better. I hope so for you. And just the fact that you opened up and told her the things is great. It must be quite difficult to talk about your feelings with somebody youÂ´ve never seen before. But you did it !







And thatÂ´s really great!Hope everything will be fine with the accommodation . Good luck


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## Guest

As Evulienka said - sounds like you are taking some really positive steps - and the fact that you are doing that ALONE will help you on the uphill battle back to good mental health. It is a long hard battle but you sound as if you are prepared to fight it - which is an excellent sign.Power to you.Sue xxx


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## Jannybitt

Go Poo Pea! Go Poo Pea!!!














You are making steps in the right direction, and you should be sooooo proud of yourself!! I'm proud of you!!







I hope you get this house, so that will be one less stress you have to deal with.You might have a good idea if you are able to get in to see your GP before the 24th to talk about meds for you.I have insomnia bad, and I have to take Ambien. I break the pill in half, but, if I have to take it to get a good night's sleep, so be it. It does me no good to be dragging around the next day. I'm go glad you've been sleeping!I'm praying a place to stay will come your way soon!! And, I can only speak for myself, but I'll be here as long as you need me, even if it's just a virtual "ear" or "shoulder to lean on! Hugs to you!!!


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## Guest

I totally agree with Jan - I know some people have a problem with sleeping pills but at the end of the day going without sleep does you no good at all!!! I was on a very low dose of diazepim (oh god, my spelling) along with my anti-depressant - which seem to have a similar effect - just got me over into sleep - I was on that with the anti-d for about 4 months - am now only on the anti-d - it seem to do me no harm - I'd say - far more harm was done in the 5 months leading up to that point when I was going literally for nights without sleep.You take care - and everything crossed from me too that you find somewhere permenant to stay.Sue xxx


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey Everyone,I got the property I applied for







i am so so so happy and relieved about it. Im moving out on Friday, so in 24hours I will have a new home. At least this is one stress out of the way. Except for the stress of moving whilst at uni..... its killing me, i dont have enough time to do everything, but i tell myslef its for the greater good!!My brain fog has lifted a bit but is still there, im hoping it will gradually get less and less as time goes on and I address my issues. I agree with what you guys have said, better to be on these sleeping pills getting sleep than getting no sleep at all. So im going to stay on them for a bit then once im settled in the new place wean myslef off.On a positive note I havent had any suicidal thoughts lately, a few break downs and tears but have managed to pick myself back up again







I hope these means i am on the mend and that all i need to fully recover is to move house, see the psych and use the sleeping pills for a while.Fingers Crossed..... i want to feel "normal" like myself again, hope im on the road to achieveing that


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## Guest

Well absolutely power to you kid - sounds very positive - I wish you all the very best in your continued recovery.Sue xxx


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## evulienka

IÂ´m glad youÂ´re feeling better







. Let us know how you are doing IÂ´ll be checking it!


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## Jannybitt

Yeah!!!! Let's dance...




























Wow!!! I'm so happy for you!!!! That is so awesome! Just take things one step at a time, listen to your psych and what they tell you you might need. You may need antidepressants for a short while just to elevate the mood and stabilize it out. I'm so excited you got a place to stay!!! No shelter for you, no sleeping at friend's houses; gonna sleep at your own place!







You go, girl!!!


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## Cartoon Creature

I swear uni just doesnt understand sometimes.I just emailed one of my lecturers asking for a one week extension on an assignment... I explained a bit of my situation, and I got back a rather blunt reply. She said yes, but also added that under normal circumstances she wouldnt and that the uni needs to be very strick on this.I might add though the reason I am behind on my assignment is actually partly her fault. See we had to do a volunteer job over the last 8 weeks, but it had to be a volunteer job out of 10 of her choices. So i chose one, she gotback to me 2 weeks later to tell me they needed a two year commitment, of course I couldnt do that I have 3 jobs and study full time, so I chose another one, it took 2 week for her to get back to me, then another week to do the orientation and then another 2 week for the volunteer place to tell me thathad no work. So then I had 1 week left. his hole time though i was trying to contact everyone and sort it out.So then I had one week to do the work and the assignment and move house and do all my other uni stuff.God im angry. I just want to send her a mean email back, but its never good to **** of the lecturer.AHHHHHHH. GRRRRRRRR. AHHHHHH. GRRRRRRRGod im trying so hard here to keep my head above water, but then mean ppl like her come along.


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## evulienka

hey Poo Pee ! I think itÂ´s not the best idea to write some angry email to your lecturer. It wonÂ´t probably help you. I understand that youÂ´re angry but take it like this : she agreed to give you one week more and thatÂ´s important. DoesnÂ´t matter what she says, you know that you deserve it !


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## Guest

Yeah wise words Evulienka - you vent your spleen here Poo - and fair enough but at least you got that extension - one day at a time!!!Sue


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## 21185

Hey Poo PeaHow are you today. If I read your email right you have 3 jobs! With school on top of that girl something has to give. I'm exhausted just thinking abou it.I am really glad you found a shrink. Does he do talk therapy, too. Some do, some don't. Glad that you found a place. See your guardian angel is looking out for you. Take care of yourself and "write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year".


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey Everyone,Oh my god i am sooo stressed, i cant seem to calm down.I got the flu on Monday (my birthday)and have felt soo ill since. I already was exhausted and couldnt think clear but now it is even worse.Also so many dramas are going on at work. I resigned from one of my jobs cause it stressed me out the most, today was supposed to be the hand over but it never happened. Cause i thought the hand over was today I had an interview for another job and was successfull. So now I have 4 jobs







I am now doing 50 hours of uni next week and 40 hours of work. I am so stressed and upset, and ill.I feel like i am falling apart again!!! Thank god I have my psych appointment tomorrow.God help me


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## Guest

Frankly Poo - I'm not surprised - look its probably none of my business but working at this pace is NOT going to do your mental health any good at all. I'm sure you realise that - I appreciate there may be financial pressures to do all of this but I think you've got to be tough with yourself and find a balance - a level of work that you CAN cope with - or you will hit the rocks - I'm sure thats partly why you were laid low with the flu.Try and have a drive, a walk or summat and think things through and try and reach a compromise and work closely with your doctors too.Sue xxx


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## Cartoon Creature

I was trying to look after my health by resigning from my other job, but it didnt go the way it had been planned too.I always feel guilty and responsible and get suckered into doing things for other ppl even though it is not in my best intrest. I feel aweful because the work is with ppl who have intleectual disbilities and if i dont go there is no one else and they will have to cancel the acitivity. But then guess who would have to make all the calls and cancel it.I just feel like i cant win,My plan was to quit this job, lay low at my temp job (i.e. not accept shifts for a while) and just do the 10hours a week at my new job. But it didnt turn out that way cause other ppl didnt up hold thier end of the bargin.I just dont know what to do


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## Guest

Poo - I totally take your point and good for you for looking after these other people - but I think, whist you are "delicate" mentally - if I can put it that way - then your first priority is to yourself and your mental well-being - after all, you won't be much use to them if you get into a worse state will you. Pull back, if you can, stick at your 10 hpw - give yourself chance to get well, and then go back to them.Good luckSue xxx


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## Jannybitt

Poo;Sue is dead on!!! You have to make yourself a #1 priority here or you won't be of much use to anyone. Put that guilt to the garbage for now, ok? You were feeling good, and you've rammed yourself into a corner and now you must just step back, regroup, and go slow. One step at a time, one hour at a time, one day at a time! We're here for ya, sugar!!


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## Cartoon Creature

I saw my psych today (thank god). She believes i do suffer from depression and that it is the probable cause to all my symptoms i have at the moment. She thinks i need a combination of medication (anti-depressants) and talking to her. As hard as it is to agree that I need to take that final step in admitting I have a problem........ I do now admit it fully. I am going to make an appointment with my GP and get myself onto antidepressants hopefully early next week, and have made an early appointment to see her again in 1 1/2 weeks.Thank you so much for all your support hey. This really is going to be a long road to recovery...... but i do want to recover and regain my life. I pray I am doing the right things.If its ok by you guys do you mind if i keep posting on this thread through what I hope is going to be my recovery. It makes me feel good to know you are here, and to talk to you. I dont really have anyone else to reach out to and I am scared to death of doing this alone.Thank You !!!!!


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## evulienka

Hey Poo ! Of course we donÂ´t mind if you keep on posting here, we are here for each other







Nice to see that you are starting to be more positive about the whole situation. And how are you doing at school? Take care


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## Cartoon Creature

I have got my doctors appointment for Tuesday next week. Im hoping to get an anti-depressant that is going to help me sleep to so i can get off the "sleepers" im on. Although on a positive note im down to 2 sleepers at night instead of 3.I know i have to take the anti-depressants, and im hoping that positive things will come from it. but truth be told i am terrified of the possible side-effects.


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## Guest

Poo - absolute power to you for admitting something is wrong and for being positive and doing something about it - I think its great that you are communicating - keep posting - we are all here for you.I can totally understand your concern about anti-depressants - but many of us here (me included) are on them. You have to give them time - you may be very lucky and have absolutely no side-effects - many don't. Then again, you may - be patient but if anything alarms you, go and seek medical support - thats what the doctors are there for. Do give them time - mine took 6/8 weeks before I saw any real positive effects. I've now been mitrazapene for over a year; am well, working part-time, guiding school kids around a National Trust property, and being a half-way decent human being, wife and mum to my 3 wonderful kids. Life doesn't end just because you have to take anti-depressants. The only side-effect I have now is that I'm too fat - but thats a very small price to pay for mental well-being!!! Well, I'd say so anyway.Hang in there - keep posting - Evulinka (ooops spelling sorry!), Jannie and I and loads more people too are all rooting for you.Sue xxxx


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## Cartoon Creature

Thanks for you encouragement and kind words SueV.Im having a bit of a bad night tonight... not to sure why just feeling very low. I have taken my sleepers early and hope they will send me off to sleep soon. Might be because my ex and I offically ended things on sat night and I am anxious about a test tomorrow.The worst part is when you feel this low you know you need to call someone, but in calling someone you have to admit to them there is a problem. I can admit to myself I have a problem but im not ready to admit it to others just yet (aside from my psych, your guys and my doctor.Ive just got to tell myself i will be ok, and that i am seeking help and that these things take time, try not to think about it and dwell on it







. Its so hard cause it just becomes so consumingI havent felt like myself for 4 months. I miss being me and feeling normal. I wish I had more control over this feeling, this brain fog and hurt inside.


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## Guest

I'm really sorry you are having a rough time Poo - I've been there - I can totally understand how you feel but I can promise you that things will get better. I remember my psychiatrist telling me "its tiny baby steps at first" - you will start getting a good hour, then a good days, then several and before too long - you will be able to look back and think "actually I've felt like myself for weeks, months, whatever" - I know its really hard but you are just going to have to be a little kind to yourself and give yourself time!!!Keep in touch won't you.Sue xxxx


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## 17522

Suv V, Hello, I noticed you said your are on Mirtazapine.. What dosage are you on?? I am afraid to try it.. My Doctor wants me to try 15 mg at night.. I have IBS/agorophobia/anxiety. I need a life.. The other SSRI made me really sick. I am hoping this is a good one.. Let me know please how long it takes to work and if yo like it.. Thanks So Much!!!


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## Guest

Well who LIKES being on an anti-depressant but I've got to stress - they are very ideosyncratic so whilst it suited me (and only after about 6 weeks) - it may not suit you. 15mg is a very low dose - so try not to worry - I'm on 30mg at night and I'm really well though abit fat - makes you eat like a hoss!!!!I wish you all the best ryleigh - but be patient - it might take a while to "kick in". If I can be of any further help - please let me know.Sue xxx


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## 17522

Sue, Thank you so much.. I am underweight so a few pounds would be ok.. I am really tired of being sick and tired.. Maybe this will help me...


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## Guest

Well I wish you all the best ryleigh - I think its certainly worth a bash don't you??? As I say, it helped me no end - but give it a chance - any improvement won't happen overnight. Keep in touch please.Sue xxx


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## Jannybitt

I'm on antidepressants and wouldn't give them up if you paid me!!Poo-hang in there, girl!! I'm not at my best right now physically, which is bringing me down mentally, so I can relate to the feeling. But, Poo, there is nothing wrong in telling someone you have a problem or you just need to talk. We are here for you. It's not the same as being on the phone, but hope it helps some.Ryleigh-I know it's hard and you're afraid, but one thing I can tell you, is that Sue won't steer you wrong! Every antidepressant works differently, but you have to start somewhere!If you start somewhere, you 'll get somewhere!Hang in there!!!


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## Cartoon Creature

Im feeling much better after the other day, things got pretty low but thankfully the meds kicked in and i fell asleep.I have my dr appoint for prescription to antidepressants in 4 days and my pysch in 5 days. Onward and upward hey







Ryliegh - im terrifed of the side effects to, im hoping i dont have any or if i do they are mild.


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## Guest

Poo - give them a chance - you may be very lucky and have no side-effects at all.I'm away now for just over a week - I haven't deserted this board - we are renting a cottage in the Lake District for a weeks' R&R with the doggie - so fingers crossed for some dacent weather.Take care everyoneSue xxxx


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey SueV,Hope you have a great break at Lake District, i have my fingers crossed for you that the weather is awesome


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## 18609

yes, enjoy your trip to the Lake District... just hope you don't bump into me! Make sure you check out Penrith - theres some good pub meals to be had up here.


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## Jannybitt

Hey Poo Pea;How are you doing? Did your weekend go well? Just checkin' in on you!







'Cause I care!


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## evulienka

Yeah Poo, how are you doing ?


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey Janny and EvuThank you for checking in on me







Im doing pretty good today... and the last few days actually.I broke up with my boyfriend (for good, NO contact) just over a week ago, and whilst it hurts a bit still and sometimes i wonder about him or if he has moved on yet, it was one of the best things I ever did. Since the night I ended it I have been down to two "sleepers" and been sleeping pretty much all night. I have been having the best sleep ive had in 4 months.He used to stress me out so much, he would bug me, pick on me and nag on me all day until I couldnt take it anymore and I just wanted to scream. It feels like a big weight has been lifted of my shoulders.Oddly ive also started eating again, ive put 2 kilos back on and its playing with my IBS a bit (had lost 10 kilos, but didnt really want to put it back on lol). I just got back into exercising over the weekend too, taking it nice and slow. I also quit one of my jobs and so now im down to just two plus my studies







.I have my doctors appointment for anti-depressants tomorrow and another psych appointment on Wednesday.Whilst I may still have my ups and downs, and I get a little scared I wont find "the one" I feel that I have chosen life, and that I am fighting for it and hopefully making steps in the right direction. I remind myself that this is "my" time and that I need to think about me for a bit, take care of myself.How about you guys, how are u doing?Poo Pea


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## Jannybitt

Glad to hear you're doing well!! You've made some great decisions, including breaking up with someone that obviously made you miserable. The exercise is a great idea because it emits endorphins, that's that feel good feelin' you get, sort of like after a laughing attack!







You are a success story!!I'm doing pretty good. I felt good enough today and got a bunch of stuff doing including grocery shopping and clothes shopping, which I hate to do!!! I'm wiped out now, icing my back, and will probably be kicking myself for doing so much tomorrow but gotta do it while you feel good enough to, right?!







I go to the gynecologist to, I guess, set up a laproscopy date, to see if there is endometreosis or whatnot. The consult is on the 12th, so I'll see from there. Take care of yourself and if you ever need me, you can pm me anytime!!


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey EvuSounds like you have had a very productive day







. I know what you mean though, when your having a good day, just get out there and get everything done. I hope things go well with the gyno too, I dont know much about endo but ive heard its aweful.You mentioned your iceing you back.... do you have a back injury?Well I got my anti-depressants yesterday, he has put my onto Zoloft. Apparantly its one of the best ones with the least side effects. I am supposed to take 1/2 one this morning to start with, I am terrified though. Ive been looking at the box for the past 1/2 hour. Im not sure if i will take one this morning, i think i may have to psych myself into it.


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## Jannybitt

Hey Pea Poo;I think you were replying to me







Yes, I have a back problem. I have a herniated disk at the low end of my back. I've had back problems forever, it seems. So, I've been to the chiropractor, he did as much for me as he could, and have had to epidural steroid injections into the disk; didn't really do any good. Now, I have to try and strengthen my back, and lose some weight. And also, follow up with the gyno. Ya, no fun, but gotta be done. Honey, don't be afraid of the Zoloft! It will be ok. That was the first antidepressant I was ever on and other than a dull headache and tiredness, I was fine. Took it for a long time until it stopped working for me. I've been on Prozac, Zoloft, Amitryptaline, I think Effexor, and now I'm on Cymbalta. I wouldn't give up my antidepressants for anything. You'll be amazed at how much better you will feel. If you want to talk specifically about it or need me for anything, PM me. I check it everyday, usually twice a day!It will be ok!! Hugs!!


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## Cartoon Creature

Hey Janny,Ooops im a bit of a dork, i was talking to you lol, sorry bout that.How did you herniate the disc in your back? Is it something that can be fixed? Will the back exercises and weight loss make a big difference.I did take the 1/2 tablet of zoloft the other day, but then i didnt sleep very well that night and felt really ill the next day. It could have been the tablet, but it could also have been the fact i studied unitl 11.30pm that night and then jumped straight into bed... all my mind could think about was the assignment I had been working on for 10hours that day.Now im more scared than ever to take the pills. I know that right now sleeping issues are the worst thing for me. It os the really good sleep i have been getting lately that has made me feel so much better.Thank you for listening to me!! Im not to sure how to PM though.Poo Pea


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## evulienka

Hey Poo, I am not taking antidepressants but I know they need time to start working so give it a while. And if itÂ´s not good you can always talk to your doctor and choose some other ones or change the amount. ItÂ´s gonna be fine. I couldnÂ´t sleep the other night very well either but it was because of the stomach pains . I just got my period and had lots of gas and pain and everything as usually, but fortunately itÂ´s already gone and IÂ´m quite fine right now. OK sorry for rumbling







I guess I just needed to vent out. So I hope the pills will start to work for you soon. Take care


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## Jannybitt

Poo Pea;I'll pm you so you'll see how it is done. But you basically go up to new, pick private message, then you have to invite a buddy. Type in Jannybitt, and it will be added to your list. then you can add my name and invite for the topic. Then you just write to me and nobody else sees it. I'll pm you to get you started on it!! Happy Easter, Sweetie!


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## Guest

Sorry - just catching up on this thread after a week away. Sounds like you've made some really positive strides Poo - power to you kiddo!!!Sue xxxx


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## evulienka

Hey Poo, just wanted to stop by and say hello to you







Hope youÂ´re doing fine.


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## 15976

Jan, do you find the cymbalta to be the "best"? Do you take it for depression or anxiety or both? Does it help your IBS?


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## K9Mom

Poo Pee, I'm glad to see that you are getting the help that you need, but I wanted to add a possible medical cause for your depression and insomnia....hypothyroidism. Did the doctor do a lab test to rule out hypothyroidism prior to prescribing you the antidepressant? Thyroid problems are very, very common in women. Anxiety, depression and insomnia - as well as bowel issues - can all be symptoms of a thyroid condition. Hypothyroidism is easily corrected by supplementing with thyroid hormone, taken in pill form daily.


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## Jannybitt

Hi Kad;For me, the Cymbalta has worked the best because I have back pain, pelvic pain, pain pain







and because of the two different chemicals in the cymbalta, it does a good job for all my stuff! Everyone is different, though, and this is not listed under and SSRI, which has been shown to help in IBS-D patients. I have used those also and they worked well for long periods of time before I had to switch. I liked that there was no weight gain, no fluid retention, etc. with the cymbalta. It helps with depression and I definitely noticed it helps with anxiety, but sometimes, I've needed a boost and use Ativan. Hope this info. helps!


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## 15976

Yes, thank you. I was curious about it after I saw the pain part of it also because I always seem to have pain and I'm tired of it. I have mild back pain, moderate neck pain, frequent headaches, and jaw pain. I try to exercise to boost the endorphins but it doesn't always work.I also take ativan on occasion. I haven't asked my doctor about Cymbalta because I'm afraid he'll say it only works for depression and since I also get anxiety it won't be good for me. I may go ahead and talk to him. I have taken tricyclics too and SSRI's but it would be nice to not have the severe thirst and the SSRIs seem to be very hard for me to taper down and off of.


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## Jannybitt

Kad;The FDA approved Cymbalta back in February for GAD, generalized anxiety disorder. The website you can go to and print out to take to your dr. in case he/she doesn't know this is:http://newsroom.lilly.com/ReleaseDetail.cfm?ReleaseID=231196That's good news, huh?! So, it's used for depression, GAD, and pain. Yippee!! Thanks for asking me that because it made me do a little more research on it for you and I always like to know full details of what I'm taking, especially when it's good news!


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## 15976

Did you experience the dizziness or fainting at all? I get dizziness and SSRIs have made it better in the past after the initial build up period. I had spells of fainting when I was younger and again while pregnant, I don't want to have that!


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## Jannybitt

No dizziness at all...a little nausea.


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## 15976

Well they all seem to have nausea to varying degrees. Most of mine went away after the first few weeks or if I took it with food.Good to know, I'll talk to my doctor thanks.


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