# 14 with IBS?!



## samantha145

Hey, I'm new to this all. I used to have constipation problems when i was younger and the doctors just kinda ignored it. A few months ago i was watching tv and saw the commercial for some IBS with constipation drug for women. That's where the research got started. I haven't been diagnosed yet, but myself and my mother believe that i might have IBS. I have done much research to find that my symptoms are exact of those listed. I was reading some other posts on how people have 20 month year olds who have IBS. I figure if they've got it, then its a possibility that i do. Anyone agree with me?!


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## samantha145

incase your also wondering why i ask if anyone agrees is cause my dad is a doctor (dentist) and he knows like everything there is to know about the body. he says its "anal retraction" and i really think its IBS. he also says that i probably dont have it because only adults can get it. hell- ive gotten my period and ive been bat mitzvahd and i can drive legally in a year...seems pretty much like an adult to me haha.


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## Cinna

You can definately have IBS at your age! I'm only 15, turning 16 in 3 days! ( W00t! ) and I have IBS with C.But, you should go to your doctor and get that checked out.


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## kazzy3

Hi Samantha,It is totally possible for you to have ibs-c. I had it at your age. My 14 year old son has it now, and so does my 10 year old daughter. We have to wait and see with my 3 year old it's to early to tell for him yet. I'm 39 and still have ibs. see your doc he/she can offer some treatment options for you.


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## Kaylis9d9

I'm 22 now and I first got the symptoms when I was 15...


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## Kaylis9d9

And not to be offensive Kazzy, but if you have it and you had children that now have it, why did you keep having children? Wasn't the possibility of giving such a terrible condition to your children a factor in deciding to have kids!? It is a very big factor in deciding if I am going to have any kids with my fiance....


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## samantha145

wow thanks everyone. yea im sorta afraid to get tested for IBS. but i know i should so in the near future i probably will. yeay- im so happy people actually responded!!! lol


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## kazzy3

Kaylis, ibs is a highly treatable condition, that varies in severity from person to person. In most cases people with ibs live very productive lives and function quite normally most of the time. I hope you are not going to base your decision to have children on your ibs. My kids are happy most of the time and are perfectly normal. They have days when they feel great and days when they feel not so good, but then again does'nt everyone.


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## Kaylis9d9

IBS is certainly not highly treatable for people with severe symptoms...I have had it for 7 years and have not found one thing that has helped much besides for anti anxiety pills... It has only gotten a ton worse since I was a kid... Look on the boards... there are not many people who feel like they have found any type of treatment that helps so how could you say it is highly treatable?perhaps your "ibs" is not as bad as most people. I am in pain a majority of the time and would NEVER wish it upon anyone... having a kid with my condition would be completely my fault and I would never be able to live with myself.


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## kazzy3

Kaylis, Not to be offensive but you sound determined to have a miserable life. So have at it.


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## somewhatlost

Kaylis, there is no evidence to show that IBS is hereditary. I would not even ever consider not having children becuase I thought they "might" get IBS. Don't let this syndrome ruin your life. Kerry


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## Kaylis9d9

Determined to have a miserable life? This is because I have a very painful and life altering condition that I accepted and live with every day? Wow, you are a great psychologist. Now, if IBS was not hereditary, then what are the odds that 2 out of 2 young adult children of someone with the condition have ibs? The reason there is no evidence to show that IBS is hereditary is because they don't even know what "ibs" is caused by or what it really is... IBS is simply a label given to various stomach conditions that today's doctors are unable to diagnose... They are also fairly unable to treat the condition. THis is why so many people suffer for years, if not their whole life from it. How could you trace something to heredity if you don't even grasp what it is? In my opinion it is selfish to have kids knowing that there is a chance they would get this terrible condition. Then again, most people do have kids for selfish reasons without considering most of the consequences...This is why I do not think you have truly horrible stomach problems Kazzy.. if you did, you would not brush it off as though it was nothing... 3 kids.. and 2/3 confirmed to have IBS so far... I don't know if I would be able to live with myself if I had 2 kids with my condition....Perhaps you just have mild stomach problems and call yourself someone with IBS...That is more reasonable to me.


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## somewhatlost

Kaylis, Researchers believe that children who grow up with parents who have ibs actually "learn" this behaviour of having stomach problems. In similar terms, if for years you watch someone run to the bathroom after eating, then to a child, that is what is "normal" and should be done. Kinda like Pavlov's dogs - ring the bell and siliva forms. Anyways regardless, I don't believe that most people have children for selfish reasons. And I don't think that wanting to have a child even if you the parent suffers from ibs is selfish either. You are welcome to your opinion, as is anyone else. That is the funny thing with opinions they are like asses, everyone has one. Kerry


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## kazzy3

Kaylis, I've got to say I've seen terminal cancer patients who are more optimistic. My father was given a 10-15% survival rate, and he hasn't given up. I know a women who was born with cystic fibrosis, who beat the odds and has 3 healthy daughters. My sister in-law has MS and with meds and a positive attitude lives a very full life. I apologize to no one for my choices, certainly not for my 3 children, whom a love beyond words, and will never regret having. I am not a psychologist, but I don't need to be. I am simply wise enough to know that I have it pretty darn good. My ibs symptoms vary day to day, some days are ok, and others really hurt. It slows me down sometimes, but I always have something to be happy about. If you search the BB you will find many people who have found relief to some degree. For some it takes a very long time, and some just plug along the best they can. We all have our own choices to make. I hope you find something that works for you. Best of luck to you.


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## Kaylis9d9

You really do assume too much. You don't know my outlook or how I live my life so don't assume that I am optimistic or pessimistic... You don't need to apologize to anyone for your decisions..lol... noone asked you to. I just believe it is selfish to have kids that could possibly be born with IBS... most reasons to have kids involve fulfilling the parents' lives... So, that to me is selfish, especially if your child could be born with a sickness... I believe a decent part of IBS is hereditary, while some could be learned as well. Again, perhaps your symptoms aren't too bad... "IBS" represents a BROAD range of diagnosis... There is no real definition for the condition, and therefore, anyone that has "stomach problems" could come and say they have IBS... I'm glad YOU don't feel bad about having kids with the condition, but it really isn't about YOU is it? That is the pure definition of selfish. The fact that you are defensive shows that it is more about you and how you feel, rather than them. Ask them in 10 years, if they have a debilitating form of the condition if they wish they were born or not.


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## kazzy3

Kaylis, I wish you well. If you do not want children, you should not have them. You wouldn't be doing them or yourself any good. Parenting when done well, is the most unselfish act in the world. My children have so much ahead of them, and will make their own choices, knowing they are loved and supported in whatever they choose. My ibs is a constant challenge for me, but I don't dwell on it with them. Yes parenting is selfish too, I bask in the joy everyday, knowing that hopefully they will find their own sources of joy someday. Once again and finally good luck to you.


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## Kaylis9d9

"Parenting when done well, is the most unselfish act in the world"Huh? That makes no sense... Again you completely dodged what I said. Probably because you don't want to hear it. What is unselfish about parenting? There is nothing selfish or unselfish about "parenting."My point again is that parents have kids to fulfill their own lives... and if there is a chance to give your kid a terrible affliction, yet you do it anyway, I can only believe it to be a selfish act. Disregarding the pain that your child will go through because YOU want kids... That is the dillemna my fiance and I have come to. One that not only have you disregarded in your decision, but you don't even care that the worst case scenario in my dillemna has come to fruition. You obviously choose to ignore the main point of my last post and therefore you must not want to confront the idea. Many people don't like to hear things like this. I hope they don't actually have real ibs symptoms... if they actually did, you will have very difficult times ahead. But I guess that is ok to you, because "Parenting when done well, is the most unselfish act in the world". Do you see how irrelevant that statement is?


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## kazzy3

Kaylis, we are obviouly missing each others points. I see parenting as a joy, and unless you have children you will never know anything about it. Life can never be lived perfectly, but it would be great if we were all born with a guarantee of perfect health, but this is an imperfect world, oh well. At any rate let's just agree to disagree and move on. Take care.


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## theresnopoint

I'm only 15. I have IBS. Samantha, it's a distinct possibility. I also had a child, it was a miscarriage, but I intended to have her anyways. BTW, it prolly isn't genetic. Neither of my parents has IBS, neither do any other relatives except a distant cousin. Therefore, keezy shouldn't feel guilty at all. But I see where Kaylis is coming from, it can be painful and I wouldnt wish it on anyone...but kids are special and we deserve them. I dunno, if I had actually delivered the child it may be easier to see the issue here.


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## somewhatlost

Kaylis,I sincerely hope that you never have children. And I don't say this to sounds mean or like a put down to you. You seem to come across that you want a guarentee that you will have a perfect child. Well, Children are rarely born "perfect". There are huge risks when giving birth to a new life that the child may not be perfect. Whether it be ibs, or some other medical condition. You run the risk of having a child who is autistic, or who may have some other form of disability. Deciding to have a child is a risk, one by the sounds that you are not willing to take.Your decision not to have a child can be misjudged as being selfish, just as you have misjudged kazzy's decision to have children as being selfish. Maybe you don't want to have a child becuase you cant' be bothered to have a child that isn't perfect and may interrupt your lifestyle. Who knows, but don't put other people down by calling them selfish for their decision to have a child. Having a child is one of the greatest gifts in the world. Be thankful that your parents had you. If you dont' want children than that is your decision, but like I said don't belittle others for their decisions. Parenting a child, when done right is a selfless act. I can not tell you how many times my parents put themselves last, so that my sisters and I could be happy. They would have and still would go to the end of the world for us. They continuously put themselves last and us first. That to me is a selfless act. Not a selfish one.Kerry


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## Kaylis9d9

Somewhatlost seems very lost considering not a word of what was written makes sense... Have you read what I posted? My reference to selfishness stays with the idea that if the condition is genetic, or at least partially genetically related, having a kid with that in mind is completely selfish. My comparison is similar to someone with aids giving birth knowing that the child could very well(or definitely) have aids... That would be completely selfish. So, before you make a ridiculous response that holds no relevance to anything previously said, please read the entire thread. "You seem to come across that you want a guarentee that you will have a perfect child."Umm, I said that I didn't want to genetically give a child IBS like what I have... This is what I wrote: " and if there is a chance to give your kid a terrible affliction, yet you do it anyway, I can only believe it to be a selfish act."You interpret this as meaning I want a perfect child? I think you need to learn to read. It means I don't want to pass on IBS... that has nothing to do with perfect.Again, I cannot explain this to peopel that cannot understand plain english. If someone knowingly gives a hereditary/genetic disease to a child because they want a child to fill their lives is someone very very selfish. This is the debate that I must make. You people claiming that you are good parents have only proven the opposite... You seem to have given no thought into the possibility that it could be passed on, and hence, kazzy has 2 of her three children already confirmed with the problem before they are even 15. Please point out if I am mistaken.The response given to me for my above dillemna is "I see parenting as a joy, and unless you have children you will never know anything about it"... huh?


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## christywisty

Kaylis,Almost everyone has some chance of developing some type of disorder. It's a personal decision that has to be looked at on an individual basis. I want so much to have children, but I have over 10 diagnoses. Christy


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## christywisty

Samantha,I had IBS when I was 15 and went 6 years before getting an official diagnosis. I would suggest talking to your general practitioner (family doctor). It can be an embarrassing subject, but some people do really well on the medications.Christy


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## kazzy3

Thanks somewhatlost and christywisty. Your comments make sense to most people. Godspeed and take care.


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## Kaylis9d9

See how kazzy just ignored the comments? the fact is, it was a selfish decision that was made. Regardless, it seems that christy has the same problem as I. How old are you and do you think you will have children?


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## Kimberleiann

I just joined this site for info and support regarding IBS. I was appalled when I read the postings in which some of you chose to in a way attack Kazzy3 because she had children knowing she had IBS. I have to feel sorry for those of you who chose to do this instead of giving support or advise to help those who as yourself are dealing with this condition. There are only chances that if someone in family history has IBS that you may get IBS, no where does it state 100% chance. Have those of you who slammed Kazzy3 attacked your own parents because it must be their fault that you now have it? If so shame on you but I doubt it!! My son was diagnoised with Crohn's 2yrs ago at age 17, did I hunt down family or blame myself for his disease? NO!! This last yr my daughter began to have symptoms of Crohn's but this wk was diagnoised with IBS. Did I hunt down family or blame myself? NO! I am heartbroken and I hurt when they hurt but I am thankful everyday that they only have Crohn's and IBS and not Leukemia, MS or any other condition without hope! My children have and are going thru so much for their young lives but not once have they blamed anyone or asked why me? As a family we continue to look for answers and help with easing their pain and to make life more manageable. There are no guarantees in life that we will all be healthy but in my house we live Positive, Hopefilled Lives that we will be able to take on what life does throw at us. Please in the future keep your negative unproductive thoughts to yourself! It helps no one including you. Kazzy3 you handled your responses with respect and tact, I applaud you for that.


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## kazzy3

MomwIbs, Thank you so much for being a voice of reason. I appreciate your support, and applaud your way of thinking. I mentioned the same thing myself, that there are conditions a lot worse then ibs. My sister in-law has MS and has good and bad days, but is a fully functioning human being, with a positive attitude and blames no one for her problems. My kids lead normal lives, with good days and bad. Hey, if ibs is the worst thing coming their way, I will be eternally greatful.


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## christywisty

Kaylis,I'm 22-years-old now, but I have been dealing with these problems since I was 15. It's hard to say what I'll do. It's stressful because of the time pressure, as well. I want so much to have a biological child, but I guess that depends on how long I can hold out before my total hysterectomy and whether or not I decide to try and conceive. I've definitely struggled with the decision. My worst fear is that my child would grow to hate me. I will probably end up looking into genetic counseling to get a better idea.Christy


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## Kaylis9d9

Kazzy applauds you because she was incredibly selfish in the fact that she never even considered passing it on to her children... Had she said that she considered it ahead of time and it was a difficult decision, that I would understand. The fact is, my parents don't have stomach problems and neither did anyone else in my family... That does not mean that part of it isn't genetics... And Kazzy had a condition and didn't care because she wanted kids and that was what she was going to have no matter what. It simply goes beyond me how for 5 or so posts of mine she simply ignored the issue I brought up because she didn't want to admit it. That is the way people are though.


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## kazzy3

Kaylis, This is my last post to you, so read up.I will even put it in simple list form, so see if you can grasp this.1. You do not know my situation, or when I was officially diagnosed, so therefore your comments are out of line.2. My children are happy healthy human beings, and frankly find your posts a joke.3. Your comments are hostile and rude.If you want to continue attacking me, go ahead. I can take it. It might make you feel better.Again, I wish you only the best.


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## Kimberleiann

Kaylis9d9... We are all done with you on here!! This site is for support and help with IBS!! It is obvious that you have choosen to let IBS run your world instead of taking charge of your world. If you cant be positive or feel the need to tear others down to make yourself feel better that then please dont post!!


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## Kimberleiann

Kazzy3, Can I ask how old you were when you were told you had IBS? Have you found anything that helps you or your children with the stomache cramping? My area of expertise is with Crohns since my son has it but I am lost with what to do for my daugther. Appreciate anything you are able to share. Thank you much!!


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## kazzy3

Hi momwIbs, actually I have been doing some extensive research on ibs for a project I am working on. I am going to start a new thread with what I have learned.


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## kazzy3

momwIbs, how old is your daughter? I have found that a combo of soluable and insoluable fiber helps. I can't eat one or the other on it's own. Is your daughter primarily c or d? Muscle relaxation, and breathing techniques to my favorite tunes helps too. I wish there was one simple plan that works for everyone, but it's trial and error. May I suggest a book called...IBS: A Doctor's Plan for Chronic Digestive Troubles. By: Gerard Guillory, MD. I refer to my copy every so often when I need an idea or reasurrance.


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## Kaylis9d9

"is obvious that you have choosen to let IBS run your world instead of taking charge of your world."Nothing is obvious from a post, especially the ones I have made. Trying to decide whether to have children based upon the possibility of spreading IBS to a child has nothing to do with "letting IBS run my world"... What is obvious from a statement of "It is obvious that you have choosen to let IBS run your world instead of taking charge of your world" is that you do not have bad IBS or, perhaps, do not even have it at all. "If you cant be positive or feel the need to tear others down to make yourself feel better that then please dont post!! "I am tearing someone down because I cannot understand how they did not go through the problem that I am trying to decide on regarding having children in the first place? She didn't even care, and that deserves a response from me. It is not ME who didn't care... hence I am struggling with the question myself... She helped create her situation based on what I read, and did not give it 2 moments thought... How would this make me feel better or even help my situation. I interpretted what she wrote as an answer to my question. She did NOT think about it... so essentially she said "why should you think about it either"... Therefore I choose to debate this line of thought...


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## kazzy3

Hi Again all. I am sorry I did not think of this earlier. I want to apologize to Samantha the young lady who started this thread, and to the other young people on this board for continueing with the negative posts. I should have been old enough to know better. Do not believe that there is no relief for your symptoms. That simply isn't true. It takes some of us longer then others to find what works, but most people find something that helps, it takes a lot of detective work and determination. (See my other posts) Be happy that you are here, Ibs is just one part of your life. There is so much more. Keep a positive outlook, and do what you can to take charge of your condition.


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## Kimberleiann

Kazzy3 my daughter is 11 soon to be 12 and her symptoms are leaning towards IBS-D. I will definately be picking up the book that you suggested. I want to expose her to as many resources as possible. There are so many similarities with Crohns but then so many differences. I truly appreciate anything you can pass along. Thank you!!


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## christywisty

Kazzy3, I was thinking that myself. Samantha, is there anything we can do to help?MomwIBS, are you trying to find another way to help your daugher's IBS without taking prescription medication? I've had terrible IBS-D since I was 15, but I've had a lot of success with a medication called Dicyclomine. It's a smooth muscle relaxer that can be taken up to four times a day. I'll always have to pay close attention to my diet, but I want the best for your daughter, as well.


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## kazzy3

Hi again, it is my opinion that we should try to treat our symptoms first without meds. everyone is different as far as severity of symptoms, so for some meds work. MomwIBS, try having your daughter keep a food diary, if she hasn't already. Also have her note in the diary if she is having a good or bad day. Try this for a week or two to see if you can find a common denominator. Check with your doc to see if he/she recommends Immodiem or anything when the d flares up. Soluable fiber can be helpful in controling symptoms. Heather Van Vorous's books IBS: The First Year and Eating for IBS have helped a lot with ibs, especially d-type. Take care. It is a good idea to have a small ibs library to refer too. Take care.


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## WhoaNellie1487

Unfortunatly,Like most have stated here,you can get IBS at a young age. I was 14 when I was diagnosed with IBS.


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## lillylennox

Hi, I am 17 yrs old and I got diagnosed with IBS about 2 months ago. I was recently on the IBS support group website, and i saw a message that you posted and I just wanted to respond to it by personally e-mailing you plus, I think the site is a great initiative. Do you know if it is true that sugar exacerbates IBS symptoms? I'm worried about IBS b/c I don't know if I'm paranoid or what, but I don't want to die from this disease sometimes I avoid eating b/c i don't want my intestines to become over crowded. Can people really die from this? I have so much to live for (straight A student, very outgoing, great asset to society) One of my friend's brother died from his intestines rupturing due to lack of defication. So I would like to know if you have any advise for me what-so-ever. Thanks in advance.P.S. could you possibly e-mail me your responses. But if not, then just posting the reply on this site is still appreciated.


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## theresnopoint

From what my doctors have told me IBS is not fatal, not a single death has been recorded due to IBS, ever. Ur gonna be fine, just make sure u take good care of urself, eat right, sleep enough, drink water, and excersise, and u will make it, i promise.


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