# Don't know whether to scream or cry...



## Lauralee (Jan 4, 2002)

I had been taking three pink Caltrate every day and it was controlling my D quite nicely. Well, my headaches have been getting worse and it is highly likely it is because I have become deficient in magnesium. So, I have been phasing out the pink Caltrate trying to replace it with the Caltrate with magnesium (purple ones). I have discovered that the purple ones cause cramps and discomfort so I decided to try going without any Caltrate of any kind for awhile. BIG BIG BIG mistake. HUGE!!! I took one purple yesterday morning and none since then. I just had the worst longest most painful D attack I have had in many years. It hurt so much I almost passed out. It is still rumbling and churning and I am trying to type this fast before I have to go lock myself in the john for another half hour. I just want to cry. It is obvious I need the pink Caltrate, and it is equally obvious that I need magnesium. For me at least, it seems these two things cannot happen at the same time. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place and I just don't know what to do!







I am wondering if now would be a good time to try the hypno again. I have done the program one whole time and I started it again but stopped about a third of the way through. The only thing it helped the first time through was my anxiety and it really did a good job on that. Should I do the whole thing over as directed or do you think just a booster of several weeks listening every night would help and maybe cause something else to improve this time?I have a doctor appointment next week. I have heard of people going to their doctor and getting magnesium regularly through an IV. That is supposed to avoid the stomach problems. I will ask her about it even though that doesn't sound fun either!!!







edited to add: I have taken 2 Caltrate pink since I wrote this post and my stomach seems to be settling. I have decided to ask my doctor about Questran when I go next week. I had my gallbladder out 6 years ago. I only had very mild problems before that and they got much worse afterwards. I am wondering if that may be the problem since the hypno did nothing for my D...I have too much bile and it is ticking off my intestines. I know the Caltrate absorbs some of the bile and that may be why it has worked and the hypno did not (for the D, as I said, the hypno did wonders for my anxiety!).


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## zayaka26 (Jul 5, 2001)

How about asking your doc if there is another way to get the magnesium you need? Like inyections or something? How about multivitamins along with the calcium? I took the ones without iron and did not harm me in any way (iron makes me nauseaus). There's gotta be a way.Hang in there


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

Hi Laura, You might want to consider asking your Doc to check and make sure you are magnesium deficient. That may not be causing the headaches if your mag is fine. Also it is always good to let the Doc know that the headaches have returned.If it does turn out that your mag is low, perhaps taking a small amt of a mag supplement every other day or something and that way you may still be able to take the pink Caltrate.Here is also a link with a list of foods rich in Magnesium that you may be able to consume to help up your mag if it is in fact low.Scroll down to "Magnesium". http://www.holistic-online.com/Remedies/He...ypertension.htm Nothing wrong with doing the hypno again either. Try listening to your favorite sides. Side 3 might be helpful now too.Hope you feel better soon. BQ


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

lauralee, how are you doing now? I cannot recommend what to do for the supplements, I agree ask the doctor for the best advise on this, but just wanted to know how your doing.


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## Lauralee (Jan 4, 2002)

Thanks BQ, Zay, Eric!







Here's where I'm at now...I have been very slowly adding more magnesium and taking out some of the plain calcium. So far my stomach is doing better. I might have just tried to add the magnesium too fast. I go to the doctor Thursday morning and I'm going to ask her about the magnesium and about the Questran. If the Questran works, I won't need the calcium any more and the magnesium will be able to come back up on its own. I am trying to add more magnesium from foods as well (thanks for the link BQ!). Now, if I could just get rid of these gosh darn headaches, I'd feel like a million bucks!!!!


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## JeanG (Oct 20, 1999)

Hi lauraleeid they ever find out what was causing the headaches?JeanG


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## Lauralee (Jan 4, 2002)

Jean - they haven't found out anything for sure yet. The MRI came back clear so it's nothing very serious at least. My follow up from the MRI is tomorrow. I have some theories that I'm going to discuss with her - stress, tension, hormones, magnesium deficiency, and I will see what she thinks. Looking back, the headaches were quite a bit better while I was doing the hypno so I think stress may play a part here regardless of the real cause! I don't usually feel very stressed but from what eric has posted, the body can have stress symptoms even when the mind is not aware of any stress. I am just SO ready to be rid of these headaches!!


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

Lauralee, are you doing the HT on a daily basis still?I hope the headaches ease up for you and go away, I think there are many reasons a person can have them and its searching for the reasons, if they are tension, stress, or for what ever reasons, or even slight chemical imbalances.Let us know how your doing.







Hopefully you feel better soon though.


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## Lauralee (Jan 4, 2002)

I just got back from the doctor and I am not a happy camper! She basically called me neurotic and obsessive. Actually, she called all of us with IBS neurotic and obsessive. She informed me that people without IBS don't obsess about their bowels, only people with IBS do. Really, no sh**!!!!! I would like to give it to her for just a week so she can see what it is we go through!! She again pushed the antidepressants and I again told her I want to avoid them. She suggested levsin, I said no. She did say I need to get off of the calcium because I am taking way too much and not balancing it with magnesium and that can very likely be causing problems. I had to practically beg for the Questran but she finally agreed to let me try it. So, I have my fingers crossed that it will work. She told me on the way out the door that she still wants me to learn all I can and research all I can because it's not all bad to do that, she just thinks I do it too much sometimes. She did ask where I was getting my information and I said some of it came from this site. She rolled her eyes and equated coming here with obsessing. I told her I tried the hypno and she actually laughed at that one...obsessing again I guess. Now don't get me wrong, I usually have no problems with this doctor, she was just on her little high horse today. The problem is that her attitude is shared by way too many doctors...if you have a problem like IBS, you are neurotic and obsessive. Pisses me off!!!














eric, to answer your question...I haven't been doing the hypno, but I have been trying to take time outs to just relax each day. Some days I just can't seem to do it though. I need to re-commit to doing it more often, that might be just what I need to get out of this pattern!


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

Sorry to hear how your office visit went. Too bad the Doc had that attitude Laura. Lets us know how you are doing.BQ


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

lauralee, sorry to hear she gave you a rough time. Sometimes they do that for sure, I actually think its frustrating to themm also, but for different reasons and then there are some just don't seem to care at all it seems. Glad she is letting you try the questran and let us know how that goes and go back tto doing the HT and the relaxation techniques, which will help with the obsession. LOL







Actually, a lot of IBS is on emotional levels and those things will help keep you balanced. You do have to do them though and they are not always quick fixes, but long term coping skills and can make permenant changes to the condition. All I can say is motivate towards that, its very important.







If she want's HT for IBS info or you want to bring it, you just let me know. LOL It is also important I beleive for them to know about research with CBT and HT for IBS and how effective they can be. I met with a local gastroenterologist today who was really nice and is going to speak at one of my support groups and actually discussed IBS and those treatments for patients. I think he learned a few new things from me today.







I always try to bring them info when I go in on whatever I want to show them and that can help a lot. Blind them with science.


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## carolauren (Mar 14, 2002)

Lauralee,I was going to post a reply earlier, but decided to wait. I'm glad you got some more cool-headed replies than I would have posted. It seems that you are otherwise OK with this doctor, but I wonder if she would call a migraine sufferer "head obsessed" or a diabetic "insulin obsessed". I just can't understand the attitude. My doc has always viewed my illness as a physiological/brain problem, although we are both aware, I believe, of the psychological component in all this. I have told him in graphic detail what I go through every day. If continuing to search for information and relief is being obsessed, then I guess I'm in the same boat as you! I'm sure your doc would do the same thing if she found herself confronted with a similar chronic condition.BTW, really hope the Questran works for you. My doc steered me away from it because he had tried it himself and found it caused really bad cramping. But, then again, I've seen many positive posts about it on this board. Good luck!


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

lauralee, hope your doing okay and the headaches are easing up. I saw something in regards to them and three possible causes, tension, sinus and menstral cycle, just fyi. Hope things are getting better for you.


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## Lauralee (Jan 4, 2002)

Well, I guess I am pretty much over being mad at the doctor. I can see how it would be hard for a very healthy well conditioned athlete (she played Olympic level softball) to understand what someone with daily health problems is going through. She thinks that just throwing an antidepressant at it will make all my problems go away. She could be right for all I know, I just don't want to go that route. I tried a little of the Questran yesterday and it made me very nauseous. I will try again tomorrow. Gasgirl - I'm glad I'm not the only one here who is obsessed!







I have really been doing a lot of thinking about why I am feeling the way I do and what caused it to get this far. I am beginning to think that I have sheltered myself and hidden from life for so long that it is getting harder and harder to jump back into things. The stress started before we moved 3 years ago and that's when the headaches got really bad. Before that, I was able to work without a second thought about leaving the house. Now I have to second guess myself every time I leave (am I REALLY done in the bathroom?). I think the D has also gotten worse lately. I know for a fact I am stressed and I also know I HAVE to do something about it. Since we moved here 3 years ago, I have not made a single friend that I would go out and do things with. I am pretty much isolated and I think the more I isolate myself the harder it is going to be to get going again. I purposely chose a piano teacher in the next town so that I would have to go farther to get there. I need to re-expand my comfort circle. It has gotten way too small! I am not agorophobic, I will leave the house, I just have to obsess about it first!


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## zayaka26 (Jul 5, 2001)

Oh Lauralee, I totally understand you. Since my IBS came back (1998) I have become isolated and have no desire to make new friends or socialize that much (even though I work with so many people around me).







I still go out but with the same people and to the known places. The piano teacher is a good first step for you. I try to push myself to do things because otherwise I will end up being home all the time. The headaches could be stress related. Right now I have one and my tummy is bothering me. I am wondering if it was something I ate or just the fact that tomorrow morning I have some things to resolve.Take care,


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

Laura, I know how hard things are when you are isolated. Could you try to maybe get involved at school or your parent organization? Most schools and Parent orgs. will take as much or as little as you can give. You may find it fun and also you just might make a friend. I know helping at school has been a great source of distraction and fun too. I have made some friends and found it a great community to be in. I have had to cancel a few times because of pain, but I only missed a few times. Also you might try to pick a time that is better for you. For example; I know mornings can be difficult for IBS'ers so that may not be a great time. Pick a time that is best for you.The piano is great too. Pursue other interests that you have. Joining a club or service organization may be good too.Wishing you all the best.BQ


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

lauralee, I totally understand your post and we will help in whatever ways we can here.I highly recommend you read Dr Bolens book if you have not done so already. It may even be worth while to read that first and then seek out a CBT therapist in person for the long term benefits and to help you with all this so your not obsessing.You can do it and have faith you will get there.







That your doing the piano thing, I think is just great also.


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## Lauralee (Jan 4, 2002)

I just got back from my first piano lesson! My tummy was gurgling and rumbling before I left the house, which is usually a very bad sign, but everything went just fine! I made it with no problems at all. She gave me a lot of very challenging stuff to work on this week which actually makes me quite happy.







I am also thinking about joining a mothers' group that meets once a month at the church where my son goes to preschool. They socialize and do crafts. It would be a good way to meet other mothers with which I might possibly have something in common! All of the ladies in my neighborhood work and aren't around much. I really need to find some girlfriends, I just don't know how!







I have been playing around with my supplements and today I dropped the Vitamin C. I know it can cause bowel problems in some people. Maybe that is playing a part as well. Thanks BQ and Zay...I often wonder what life would be like if we all lived closer together and could all hang out together and we would all understand what the others were going through! Then none of us would ever have to explain why we were in the bathroom for an hour or why we just can't do things today! I guess I can dream!Eric, I have Dr. Bolen's book and for some reason I just haven't read it yet. I am hoping that once the stress of getting the kids in school and on a schedule has passed, I will have time to read it and work on me some more.


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

lauralee, glad the lessons went well for you and its not uncommon at first for the gut to hurt or be in discomfort and once you move and get your mind off it, it can a lot of timmes get better for you.I think the social events would be good for you and when you get the time, I really think Dr Bolens book will help you a lot through all this and the CBT approach to IBS and I think you will not only enjoy it, but it will make a lot of sense to you in regards to IBS.Vit C also seemed to bug me.Your doing the right things and go slow there is no problem with that, take it a day at a time, learn and work on it and enjoy the things like the piano lessons along the way. It will all get better for you.


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## zayaka26 (Jul 5, 2001)

Laura, I do too. Think about how easy it would be to go dining out or shopping with somebody that totally understands.Last time I went to Chili's I was with bf, his brother and his gf. When we were coming home (3 minutes away from the place) I had to go back to the bathroom. They looked at me like "why don't you wait?" but did not say a thing. I know they do not care that much since bf knows about my tummy and his brother has his own tummy problems too. But still, they do not have to deal with the urge and even though they are supportive and do not complain, I know sometimes they do not get it fully. In the end I just said to myself I was not going to give any explanations. All I said was, "sorry, couldn't wait". Oh well...







I'm happy for you and your piano lessons.


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## kamie (Sep 14, 2002)

Laura, I've read your posts and I'm going to throw somthing out there that may sound a little unpopular. However, I present this information to you as a woman who suffered greatly from severe migraines and a host of other problems for 20 years.I recently had what I hope to be my last migraine on June 1st 2002.I wrote that date down because I was frustrated with the medications my doctor had prescribed that I thought were not working.I have not had a migraine w/ an aura and vomiting since then and I've been able to tell my doctor (since june) that I don't need a refil on the controled substance I had been on as needed for 7 years.I had no with drawl from the old pain meds at all. I simply stopped needing them.I had an almost radical hysterectomy in April.one ovary is left and everything else is gone.I was put on those bad ol SSRI's and a combo of that and a tricyclic antidepressant.I didn't want to go that route either but here I am a few months down the road and so many things have gotten better for me in the realm of real physical pain. I simply don't know how I coped before.I can not take HRT for medical reasons. this made my post hysterectomy time unbearable.I was also left with horrible neurological pain from the surgery. There are some of these SSRI/tricyclic antidepressants that do a little more than have anelgesic properties. They actually help to address the neurological pathways of pain. I don't explain this well, but they do and can work extremely well.They also address hot flashes and for anyone who has been through surgically induced menopause, we know that experience can be both painful and nerve wracking and frustrating and mess with the beat of the heart in a way that send us to the ER wondering if we are having a heart attack.Before I went the route of the SSRI/tricyclic meds I was in so much pain after my surgery that I couldn't even lay down.I walked and walked and walked around my yard and my house trying to work out the pain because if I sat I just wanted to pull my hair out.Someone asked earlier if you are still taking HRT.Have you had a hormone level run recently?Do you know which of the hormones need replacing or balancing?You made a statement in one of your posts. you wrote >>>>She basically called me neurotic and obsessive. Actually, she called all of us with IBS neurotic and obsessive. <<<<<<Well, I don't know what they tell men, but women with valid gynecology/IBS issues get told that a lot. It's frustrating.We KNOW our pain.I was told my problems were psychological.I had a jackpot of potentially tragic out comes growing in my pelvis that no one really figured out untill they went inside with a laroscope.Hormones do play a big role in the problems for women. But hormone therapy has it's own kind of problems too.Personally, since ovarian tumors, hysterectomies and breast cancer run in my close family I would much rather have an SSRI thrown at me instead of some HRT. Even the phytoestrogen kind.So we all have to make our compromise and make our choices that will give us each the best quality of life we can manage at any given moment in time.My answers may not be right for you. But this is what I have found to be a blessing for me even though I am still working out continuing problems.But even with those still existing problems things are much less intense and at least now I can think without having pain gripping at my innards 24/7.That mess will just wear a body out.I hope you too find the best answer for your body harmony very very soon.Your pain and trouble and all the attending symptoms are valid.Don't let somone who is not understanding take the truth away from you that you do hurt and you do need someone to attempt to work on finding your answers.Keep looking. There are wonderful doctors who are smart with medications and diagnosis.I'm sure if you keep looking you will find one who will see your problem and help you with your answers.Kamie


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## Lauralee (Jan 4, 2002)

Kamie, thanks for your reply! I think there has been a misunderstanding though...I am not on hormone replacement therapy (HRT), what I am doing is hypnotherapy (HT). I can see where it could be confused! The doc says there could be nothing too wrong with my hormones at my age (34) with functioning female parts. I am not looking forward to menopause because I won't be able to take hormones. I will have to find another way to deal with all that mess when I come to it! Are you currently on SSRI's? It sounds like they helped you much more than the hormones did!I totally agree with what you said at the end of your post. It is so hard to find someone who understands what any of us may be going through and it is equally hard to find a treatment that will take care of the problems without causing more problems along the way!Eric - do you have any experience with Vit B complex? I was taking that every other day. I dropped it completely, too, just to see what would happen. Do you know if it causes distress as well?Zayaka - Do you want to go to dinner and the mall and how about a movie?


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

lauralee, as kamie has said the ssri can be helpful and something to think about, I don't know what your feelings on them entirely is however.On a side note keep working the HT for sure.







On the Vit B's I know some are stress vitamins so yes it the lack of it may caused distress. I would however have to look them up and that may take a day or two at the moment as I am trying to find one specific text on this, but you can do a search on the b vitamins and see what you come up with, I think b12 is one however.It may also help to post this to the ask the experts forum under medications to Dr Weinstock,he may have some good advise for you on them and even the ssri's.


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## kamie (Sep 14, 2002)

Lauralee, Yes, I am currently on 10 mg of Prozac and 10 mg of Elavil as a combo treatment mostly for my post hysterectomy pain. the pain was awful and I felt electrified and in apin all the time. that's the best way I can describe it.I also suffered from a never endning cycle of headaches and migraines that I attributed to a head/neck injury years ago. The sports car flipped and pinned my head under the windshield. Yep, kinda ouchy.I have degeneration in my cervical spine and guess what!! The Elavil and Prozac totally handled that deep and difficult pain that had me simply coping and running from one alternativemodality for comfort to the other so I could lead a somewhat normal life in adition to controled substances for the unmanageable part of the pain.So this combo works well for me. with SSRI's it is sometimes a whole trial and error thing.I don't do well on the higher doses of either Prozac or Elavil and there are other SSRI's that are the devil drug for me.So in the analysis of what a person needs for their medical problems, it's important to work with your doctor to sepnd a little time troubleshooting your meds to meet your body chemistry and individual needs.At 34 you might should consider having some hormone work done.You'd be surprised at the number of women who arehaving difficulty because of hormone problems even in their 20's. Hormone problems are not simply the menopausal womans syndrome. There's a lot of new information on how our hormones can play havoc with our bodies.There is a syndrome called PCOS (polycystic ovaries) and one does not even have to have cysts to fit the criteria for the syndrome.Most women in the PCOSs area are young women in the prime of their child bearing years.It's amazing what some doctors don't know abut the reproductive system or hormones for that matter.And the bad part, is that a whole lot of them are GYNECOLOGISTS!!!!!!! I got the best medication care from the Family Practitione, the Gastroenterologist and the Urologist working asa team when the Gynecologist basically had no answers for me.Yes, the SSRI and Tricyclic have helped me more than hormone replacement.I can not take HRT because I am prone to female cancer due to the medical history of my family.Hysterectomies and ovarian tumors run in the family and both my mother and her sister have had both those prior medical problems along with eventually developing breast cancer.In a family with a bad female medical history of specifics it's a general rule to not give that kind of patient HRT.Vitamin B is a group of essential vitamins that play an important role in helping us handle stress.I personally don't take vitamin B in a pill form because it bothers my tummmy.If something bothers my tummy I get distressed.So I take a sublingual B that also has B 12 in the mixture.B 12 is a very essential nutrient for nerve function.It is mostly only available through animal food products such as meat and dairy.Salmon is one of the richest sources of Vitamin B-12 so if you add a little Salmon to your diet as little as twice a week, you should have plenty fine B-12 to help support your nerve function.I don't know about the rest of the b vitamins but if one is deficient in B12 long enough it can cause some permanat damage. So try the B's in a sublingual form. It might be a little easier on you. I don't take my B's every day. I do them about every other day. But then I don't drink or smoke and drinking or smoking uses up that vitamin right away so people who might driink and smoke need more vitamin B than people who don't drink or smoke.Take Care and I hope you find some good answersreal soon. When we find at least one thing that makes us feel better it is a wonderful day.Kamie


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## Lauralee (Jan 4, 2002)

Kamie, is the sub-lingual B you take a B complex? I think the Vitamin C has been bothering me more than the B has been, but any way to avoid the tummy has to be a good thing!


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## kamie (Sep 14, 2002)

The B complex is called B-Total. You can order it through most any pharmacy if they don't have it on the shelves. It's sometimes a product they keep behind the counter in the working area of the pharmacist.There is also a liquid vitamin C but I don't know which brand that would be or how it works. A friend of mine just recently got some.I can only take vitamin C in the chewables.I take a few and then I skip days. I eat good fruit but not a lot of citrus because cirtus slows down the gut.Apples do too. When I had my impaction surgery the gynecologist(who was there because she had to make sure I didn't break the still healing stiches from my hysterectomy) told me that apples and citrus were not the best choices of fiber for my situation.I've since discoverd that for me pears are the best to work with my IBS-C.Kamie


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## MARKA (Apr 10, 1999)

Lauralee although this incident may have been a one time occurance with your doctor you may want to try a different type of doctor. I go to a DO not an MD and he is unbelievable at really getting to know me. They practice a bit different although fullylicensed. They believe in healing the body as one instead of one area of the body at a time. He has me on Serzone and Xanax, not saying this is what you need but they tend to just understand you better. This doctor will kneel on the floor, put his hand on his chin while leaning on the exam table where you are sitting and say "Okay, Mark, what seems to be bothering you? " then he sits and talks to me for about 10 minutes and does this with follow up visits. He really gets to know you and how YOU OPERATE inside and most importantly what makes you tick - because he knows no one ticks the same way. You just might want to try this route. heck, if it does not work - oh well, nothing lost right?Mark


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