# prebirth blues help please



## SHERBIE (Dec 23, 2003)

I've just found out that I'm pregnant and up til this point for six months thinking that this was what i wanted after years of being anti-babies. Now I'm pregnant all I'm doing is crying and saying that I want rid. I feel nothing but dispair, and cant see any positive reasons for having a baby.My husband says he'll probably leave me if I get rid of it as this is my current thinking, because he cant stay with someone who could do this... Everyone keeps telling me that its my hormones till im ready to scream. I feel as though everyone hates me for the way that i feel.I want to feel happy but am finding it impossible. Am I really abnormal? What can I do?


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## Elariel (Jan 1, 1999)

get to your doctor ASAP. you're not abnormal, lots of women have 'bad' feelings during/after pregnancy, but not all say anything. you need to get a handle on this before the baby does come. and I know it's hard to hear that it's hormones, but it most likely is. Go see your doctor and also see about a counsellor. you can get through it, and there's no shame in asking for help!


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## 21286 (May 7, 2005)

Not only did I have despair during my pregnancy, it has continued. I'm on anti depressants for this. Talk to your husband, doctor and friends. You need a lot of support.Also, I found that praying helps to relax myself.Chris


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## SHERBIE (Dec 23, 2003)

I'm only seven weeks pregnant. Isn't it too early to have hormones that make me feel like this. I was excited for one day and that was it. WHAM! I want to get rid of it.







SICKOFBEINGSICK did you suffer from depression before you were pregnant and how far into the pregnancy did it start?


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## Kathleen M. (Nov 16, 1999)

Given that hormones are different from shortly after you get pregnant I don't think it is ever "too early" in the pregnancy to be hormonal, and even normal hormonal monthly fluxuations can play havoc on the mood.You do need to talk to someone about this. Both from the is this a hormone thing or do you have fears, etc. that are helping to drive the feelings. For Example. Are you someone that doesn't like change? Having a baby is a big change and can be scary and that sort of thing could be driving this. Do you fear your husband will leave all the child care issues to you alone? Are all the reasons you were anti-baby for so long re-rearing their head (look at what led to the change of heart on that and see if there is more work to do to resolve things).And even if there is other emotional stuff going on the hormones are not helping to stabalize your mood. And while I don't have personal experience with pregnancy, I have lots of friends who go through all sorts of issues when pregnant even when they have always wanted to be.Take care of yourself, and definitly talk to your doctor about how you are feeling and get some counseling to help you with this.


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## SHERBIE (Dec 23, 2003)

thanks for the replys. To make matters worse, went to the dentist today with toothache only to be told that nothing could be done as couldnt have any antibiotics in pregnancy as allergic to penicillin and need tooth removed. Need to wait til after birth... 7 months away!Was given mouth wash and told to take paracetamol... Also I should know better than to expect treatment! Why should I, I've never done this before. All this stress is giving me horrendous D and gas!


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## Jeanne D (Nov 14, 2001)

Sherbie,As others have said, go see your dr. and talk to someone. Your body is doing some major changing and so are your hormones.I myself didn't experience the depression you are, but I was more prone to crying and being very sensitive during pregnancy. I know it's kind of scary having a baby .. it's a big responsibility, but you'll do fine and learn as you go.. we all did. I think once you hold that little person in your arms, your heart will just melt.Take care of yourself.((((HUGS)))Jeanne


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## SHERBIE (Dec 23, 2003)

> Originally posted by sickofbeingsick22:Not only did I have despair during my pregnancy, it has continued. Sick of being sick, did your depression start when you were pregnant? Did you feel like it before and would you honestly have had the baby if you'd known how you would feel now?


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## PrairieAngel (Aug 29, 2002)

I am just days away from giving birth to my first child and I just wanted to let you know I had similar although not quite so extreme feelings when I first got pregnant. Certainly the idea of being pregnant is "safer" than the reality of seeing that positive pregnanncy test. My first reaction was surprise then fear. Which I think is normal. But I went thru all the emotions of "not wanting to do this" too because it was now the reality. I would advise as everyone else has said...get some help. My big concern for you is that this is causing such a problem in your relationship. I have shared these feelings with my husband and he was really supportive. I still have my fears about labour and being a good mom but I think it should be scary...it's the most important job in the world and there is no training!! I hope things get better for you real soon.


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## SHERBIE (Dec 23, 2003)

thanks for the reply and good luck with the birth!


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