# Eating disorders



## 13545 (May 27, 2006)

Hi Im fairly new to this forum but I have taken great comfort over he last few weeks reading about everyones lives. Finally some people who sound just like me. I was diagnosed in September but have had it for about two years now. Its being pretty bad over the last few months and I am at the point where i can't eat anything without getting pain. The thing I was wondering about was if anyone else has had or has other eating disorders. I have always been very consious about what I eat and avoid fats at all costs. Things seemed to have gone a bit far now though and along with eating very little partly because of the pain and partly because i like losing weight I have also been exercising excessively. I have always done exercise on a regular basis but now I am going to the gym before work (6am-7am) and then running at lunch time and sometimes a run in the evening before an exercise class. I am 5 foot 10 and weigh 8 stome 13. My heads wrecked I keep thinking that maybe the anxiety of eating is causing me the trouble although i can eat an apple and still be in pain! Any thoughts would be most gratefully recieved.


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## 14448 (Jun 14, 2006)

Hi Mazzie,I understand something of what u are going through and I really sympathize. Please see your GP as it seems that you're on the verge of anorexia, particularly as you say you like losing weight and do excessive exercise.I've had ibs all my life, but last year it got really bad. I cut out wheat, gluten and dairy and lost a lot of weight. I got v.thin and my BMI dropped to 15, mainly because the less I ate, the less my body seemed to tolerate food. I'd go for half a day without eating, then eat a rice cracker, get cramps, and be scared to eat again. I found losing weight kind of interesting at first because I was curious to see how thin I might get. The crunch came when my GP gave me a leaflet about anorexia as I left her office (I'd come about ibs), I realised she thought I had an eating disorder, then I realised I WAS actually heading towards one. My periods had stopped, I felt cold all the time, couldn't bear the feeling of tight clothes, and was irritable and tired, yet I was blaming it all on the ibs. I realised I had to do something and drew up an eating plan, gradually I ate more and eventually re-introduced wheat. My ibs got worse for a while but it has improved since. I'm still thin but now I'm healthy (my boyfriend nolonger complains I feel like a bag of bones), am happier, and look back on last year as a really 'dark' time. It's important to break the cycle of anorexia as it can spiral out of control very quickly. They say anorexia sufferers often begin because it gives them a sense of control over something (I guess that can be control over ibs), but you end up being controlled by the eating disorder because it becomes an addictive pattern. Maybe your doctor could prescribe anti-spasmodic meds to help with the ibs? I also find aloe vera juice and flaxseed oil helps a lot. You mention anxiety, that is also something that can be treated. I have anxiety and take propranalol and diazepam, and alot of people with ibs-anxiety take xanax.Also, think about what you want from life...If you deprive yourself of food you also deprive yourself of energy and enjoyment of life. Starving yourself to cope with ibs symptoms can lead to full-blown anorexia, which in its turn can cause malnutrition, infertility, heart problems and even death. Ibs is horrible, but there are lots of things that help.Good luck and let us know how ur doing


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## 13545 (May 27, 2006)

Hi thanx for your reply, it nice to hear a bit of support from someone who actually has an idea of what I'm going through. I was taking amitriptyline (however you spell it) its an antidepressant but at very low doses as the doctor said it might help reduce the spasms. (not because he thinks im depressed) But that hasn't help and I am currently taking aloe vera juice although no joy with that either. Its interesting what you said about not eating for most of the day and then getting pain when you did as this is what I do I guess. I am also like you in that I am interested to see how thin I can get but its causing problems between me and my boyfriend. He is always on at me to eat and has pretty much said he doesn't find me attractive at the moment. You would think that I wouldnt let this ruin my life but its a viscious circle, food equals pain and if I don't eat I feel better and get thin, bonus. Im thinking that I really should speak to my doctor about this but he hasn't been very helpful as it is, I don't want him to dismiss me and say its my fault and Im causing it. God I know I sound stupid Im pretty screwed up.


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## fonzi (Mar 1, 2006)

HiI understand everything you are saying. I know I am not anorexic or bulimic but I do think I have problems with food. Im not sure if my IBS is a result of my deiting or if my hangups about eating are caused by IBS. I think a mixture of the two.I also will not eat for most of the day and then eat on a night when I dont have to do anyhting so it doesnt matter if I get pain and bloating.I also lost a lot of wieght and liked it so I carried on not eating in the day and only on a night. But my pain and bloating got worse and worse. Even when I didnt eat my stomach was like a football. That also made me think I shouldnt eat! God its so confusing. I know try to eat more regularly but its hard because I have put the weight bak on and I hate it. But when I eat small regular meals I feel a lot better. I dont get as bloated. Although sometimes I do just blow up like a balloon for no reason! Why does this happen?


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## Screamer (Aug 16, 2005)

Hi Mazzie, yep, I hear where you are coming from. I never ever had a problem with body image. I was perfectly okay that I had hips and boobs and then after my daughters were born I had a really bad patch of IBS (that's finally easing a bit the last 3 months after nearly 3 years). I lost an awful lot of weight (like you I'm 5 ft 11 and I got down to 48kgs without trying). At first I felt revolting, I had these sticking out ribs, flat pancake breasts I was embarrassed and used to cover up my boniness. Then some sick part of me realised I liked being super thin! I don't know why. My family all kept telling me how sick and awful I looked but I was loving it and started wearing tight tops and things (I didn't look anorexic, just very thin). Then I put the weight back on and for the last 3 months I've struggled with the idea that I am fat (I'm not, I'm well within my weight range for height). I do exercise but mostly it's to tone up and to be healthy, but I do still struggle with binge eating from time to time then having to stop myself from going overboard with exercise. I think it would be a good idea to see your doctor about this and they can refer you to places that can help. I think that sometimes in today's society where being thin can mean you are beautiful happy and whatever else good (all false) that we can get a bit carried away at times, especially seeing as for the most part we feel so bad! It's good that you realise there is a problem, go and see someone. I am now trying to relearn to love being a woman and not a stick







Sorry to ramble, I don't really talk to anyone about this, I just see a bit of myself in you I guess


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## 13545 (May 27, 2006)

Hi thanx for your replies, I know its not always easy talking about stuff like this but I really do mean it when I say its so nice to hear from people who think just like me. A couple of people at work have expressed their concerns to me and one lady told me I looked quite ill and that my cheek bones were sticking out. When i look at myself I don't think I look attractive I've gone from a 34 dd to a 32 a/b and although I always hated my big boobs Im startig to wish i had a little more. But I don't want to put any weight on its like there are two voices in my head.I agree with you that the pain and bloating gets worse when you don't eat I don't think my body can take food anymore, which is a good excuse not to eat. But I don't want to be like this forever, Im going on holiday in August with some girly friends and Im worried how im going to be. Im going to Bulgeria god knows what Im going to eat, and drinking is out of the question! The worst thing is Im probably doing myself more harm than good, whats the answer, im not sure there is one!


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## ziggystardust00 (Aug 10, 2003)

I can relate to what you guys are saying. I think I have a bit of a problem with food at times. It's nothing at all to do with body image- I'm thin and always have been (am lucky!) without having to worry about what I eat, although no doubt that will change with age. I have a lot of food hang ups though, I'm terrified that something trigger the IBS. I hate eating out and I'm wheat intolerant. (Would be interested to know how you re-introduced wheat Sukie- I want to but am scared!)I can't believe I'm saying all this stuff out loud as it were. I hate admitting that I have a problem with it but still







I know I'm not the only one by any means.I think it's true about not eating- cos sometimes if you don't eat anything all day it can make things a worse the next. Not sure. But when I'm travelling etc I tend not to eat which is so bad. Argh am just ranting now.... not good and not very useful! Sorry I can't offer any advice, except like the others said, see the Doctor about it maybe- to try and break the routine. xx


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## 14448 (Jun 14, 2006)

Hi,I think the problem with irregular eating is that it works for ibs in the short term (ie your digestive system 'goes to sleep' for a few hours when u don't eat) but in the long term it puts a strain on it and makes ibs worse. I know what you mean about being scared to eat. I used to wish (and still do sometimes)that there was a form of injectable nourishment that you could put directly into bloodstream, bypassing tummy altogether! It would be especially handy for travelling. A few years ago I went on holiday to Italy. I was terrified I'd get IBS so I refused to eat in hotel dining room (my family was furious), I lived off packets of crackers and sesame-snaps that I'd brought in my suitcase. Despite almost starving myself I had an attack of cramps and d every day, yet ironically the last 2 days when I DID eat properly I was fine!! I'm sure u can get addicted to not eating. I used to find that when I got past the hunger I'd get on a 'high', and it seemed a shame to spoil it by eating (and getting pain).Mazzie, I know exactly what u mean about the '2 voices'! I think society and the media is v.much to blame for women's desire to b thin. Even if u have a good body image, if u start losing weight u feel that ur doing something desirable, somerthing that most women would kill for, because we r conditioned by endless magazine diets, exercise plans and skinny celebrities. Fonzi and Screamer, when I gained weight it felt horrible at first (even though I was still thin), I hated the feel of my 'new' body, I think it was only my boyfriend's excitement that spurred me on. Give urself time to adjust + keep reminding urself that having an energetic woman's body is much sexier than having one like a diseased stickinsect.I think if there is an answer to all this, it's to retrain ur body to tolerate small, regular amounts of food, but be prepared for ibs to get worse for a few weeks before it gets better. Try writing down the reasons why u want to change, to give u inspiration. For me, I simply reached a point where I was tired of feeling deprived, unattractive and moody. Ziggystardust, the way I introduced wheat was to do it v.gradually. I'd cut out wheat and gluten in the hope it might improve my ibs but it didn't make much difference. I started by eating 1 slice of rye bread a day (wheat-free but contains gluten), after 2 weeks doing this I substituted 1 piece of GF toast for a wholewheat one. After a few months I had a celiac test, which came back negative, so I introduced more wheat. When I first started I had bloating +cramps as my body adjusted, but now I can eat up to 4 pieces toast a day +small amount pasta, so it was worth it for me. My boyfriend pointed out to me that life is short and that food is one of the most essential and primitive pleasures we have. Although there r things I know I can never eat + things that will trigger explosive ibs, I do enjoy food again + it's a lovely feeling. Good luck everyone!


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## 13545 (May 27, 2006)

Has anyone had an allergy tests? I am just trying to think of a few things I could ask for when I go to the GI specialist next month. I have a bad feeling he will turn round and say well there is nothing we can really do for you coz thats all I seem to get. Two years down the line and Im worse of than Ive ever been.My aniexty levels are through the roof and I don't know if thats a result of IBS or if thats whats contributing to my IBS. I think lack of food probably isn't helping my mood and being on my own is what I like best at the moment. The only thing I really eat is some fruit during the day and a yoghurt in the evening. Ive also been snacking on dates and raisins. Im cooking my boyfriends dinner and pretending ive eaten mine, but he knows I think, and has asked me to try this carbohydrate drink he takes after going to the gym. I really do not want this as its full of calories and god knows what it will do to me! Are there any foods that anyone can eat without any form of reaction? I know everyones different but I don't know where to begin!


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## ziggystardust00 (Aug 10, 2003)

I had a test for food intolerances....not the same as allergies though. I was found to be intolerant to wheat, which, looking back really made sense. I definitely have a problem eating it (well not things with a tiny amount in). It has helped being off wheat (have been off it for nearly 3 years now), wish I'd done it sooner! It hasn't cured the IBS but it has helped I think.I know what you mean about anxiety Mazzie, I don't know which came first the IBS or the anxiety with me!! Most of the time I'm OK but sometimes I'm a bag of nerves. I try to be better and go out and do stuff etc but mostly I avoid it!!I don't think there's any particular food that everyone can eat without reactions- like you say, everyone's different. Most people go for the more bland stuff I would've thought. With me, it's stuff like wheat&gluten free bread. I suppose it's just a case of trying things out and maybe keeping a record of it? I wish I could get over the being scared to eat thing. With me it's more being scared to eat out, I eat a lot usually but not if I'm out! It's nothing to do with losing weight or being thin with me, but about getting ill from eating the wrong food







but I can totally sympathise with you xx


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## 14448 (Jun 14, 2006)

It might b worth getting a lactose tolerance test. I'm lactose intolerant so I avoid all dairy products.Also, it sounds as though ur eating a lot of fructose (type of sugar found in fruit, esp. dates+ dried fruits). There have been lots of studies that suggest fructose causes ibs symptoms, particularly in people who r sensitive/intolerant to it. If u get allergy tests make sure they r done by doctor, there r a lot of 'quack' tests around like hair-analysing, usually by health food shops trying to make money. An intolerance is harder to diagnose than an allergy as symptoms can show up days later. Anxiety can definately b a cause of IBS, like u I'm not sure if it causes my symptoms or is an effect of them. I do have some 'safe' foods though, that v.rarely cause reaction for me. These are:bananaschicken stock souplean protein like chicken/turkey breaststeamed veg like carrots, mushroomsokra (supposedly v.good for ibs as they contain anti-inflammatory juices that soothe intestines)toast (small amounts)Alpro-soya yogurts.


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## thome (Oct 4, 2001)

I was overweight and went on a diet years ago. I lost over 50 pounds.I gave up sugar, white starches, meat,diary, anything fried. I lost weight but I think I now triggered IBS. I am reading what all of you are saying and I do the same things. I don't eat in the morning and sometimes lunch too if I have to go out. My food choices are very limited. I eat veggies, fruit, whole wheat bread, pasta, and brown rice. I use soya products, beans, and lentils for my protein. I thought I was doing my body good. I am now realizing it is just a form of an eating disorder. I also use to take three senna pills every night to clean myself out. I have since had surgery to fix a rectal prolaspe. Every couple of days I binge on cookies,ice cream, chocolate sauce, bagels and then I suffer the consiquences. I can relate to everything you all said, I have just never thought of as an eating disorder. I am also taking Xanax for anixety and depression I have started to take less as I was becoming dependant on it to sleep. Which came first, the IBS, anixety, depression, or eating problems? I am very confused but it something to think about.


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## 14448 (Jun 14, 2006)

In my case the IBS came first, which made me scared to eat, which in turn led to eating problems. I've had anxiety problems most of my life, anxiety triggers IBS and vice versa. On the other hand, my friend has IBS becasue she was desperate to lose weight when she left school, crash-dieted, became anorexic and bulimic (which puts huge strain on digestive system), and now has such severe IBS that it's difficult for her to shake off the eating problems.I think there is a lot of extreme 'healthy eating' advice/plans around that r misleading and potentially dangerous. When I was in my first year at uni my IBS got really bad, (mainly because I have social anxiety disorder and was afraid to go in shared kitchen, so I lived off cereals and nutella in my room!) Instead of trying a more balanced diet, I decided to do an 'exclusion diet' which involved cutting out major food groups for 12 weeks or so. My blood-sugar was so haywire I used to wake up in the night craving marshmallows and thinking about meals I'd had years ago! I cut out so much my body couldn't deal with food anymore and its taken me a year to get IBS back to a manageable level. Has anyone seen a dietician?


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## thome (Oct 4, 2001)

I saw a dietition when I was in the hospital. I got the "eat more fibre" speech. When I asked her which kind soluable or insuluable she said it didn't matter. I felt I knew more about healthy eating than she did. All she gave me was a print out from the internet with the info to eat all bran, etc. She knew nothing about IBS!


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## 13545 (May 27, 2006)

Yeah Ive seen a dietition, she was quite nice and I tried eat fibre diets, don't eat fibre diets, diary free, wheat free and nothing really worked. I went on this rice diet and I lost alot of weight as I couldn't really eat anything. She told me I needed to put on weight and her suggestion was to swop a cake for the fruit I was snacking on. That just seemed so alien a dietition telling me to eat cake instead of fruit it goes against all my rules! When I went to see her last year I was actually eating three meals a day and I was honest with her telling her I ate very healthly, If I went back now she might have something to say though if I was honest about what Im eating. Today I had some museli for breakfast I thought I would try and eat but it took a few hours to recover from it and I just felt so agitated. Ive just had a yoghurt and feel fine but Im now going to the gym as I feel I want to burn off what ive just eaten. Crazy aren't I?


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## 14448 (Jun 14, 2006)

You're not crazy Mazzie, just caught in the vicious eat=pain cycle.Also it sounds as though u have, or are on the verge of having, anorexia, because eating next to nothing then feeling the need to 'burn it off' through excessive exercise is a classic symptom. Maybe u could find a more understanding GP? Good luck and keep in touch


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