# IBS/Anxiety is ruining my life



## Guest (Aug 17, 2016)

Hello everyone! I'm not sure where to begin, or what I hope to find, but I've run out of options so I'm gonna give this a shot. I'm 23 years old and what I've been told is "IBS" is ruining my life. I've always had what I generally term "stomach problems", for as much of my life as I can remember. I'm supposing this all stems from a stress filled childhood of abuse & never learning any healthy ways to cope. It all seemed to drastically worsen after my father's death when I was 14. The anxiety related to my "stomach issues" (diarrhea, severe abdominal pain, urgency) forced me to drop out of public school and complete high school via a distance learning homeschooling program. For a few years I really couldn't leave my house without overwhelming and crippling anxiety and fear that I would "get sick" while out in public. If I did leave I always had to know where each bathroom was, if it was private enough, as well as have a fool-proof escape route in the event my symptoms flared up. Stressing these issues so much of course did most often cause a flare, very counter-productive I know, but it's just how my brain works no matter how much I try to stop it. I was in therapy for several years but nothing seemed to help. I've been on so many different psych meds over the years I really can't even remember them all. I eventually got fed-up enough that I was able to muscle some control over my stomach and managed to further my career in healthcare becoming a CNA and eventually getting my LPN license. After being out of school and working for a year as a LPN I recently decided to go back to school for my RN. About halfway through my first semester back (over the summer) these issues became worse than they've ever been. I can barely leave my house to go to work, nursing is a very stressful field and it makes my symptoms so much worse working in a very high stress environment. Now, I know I can't go back to school until these issues are resolved and that crushes me. My career has always been my driving force and passion. My doctors wont listen to anything I say. Even as a nurse myself, they dismiss and minimize the severity of everything, treat me like a drug seeker, or even as though I'm making it up or insinuating I'm crazy and "it's all in my head". Suggesting I'm choosing to be this way, and somehow I can miraculously think myself better when I practically beg for help. This has driven me to a point where suicide is an ever present nagging option. I don't see my situation as living, this is just a miserable existence. I'm a prisoner of my own mind and body and I want nothing more than to feel good again. I feel like I've exhausted every option and I'm not sure where to go from here, but something has to change. Any advice would be greatly appreciated, I feel like I'm at the end of my rope...


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## northern soul (Aug 8, 2016)

Hi sorry your feeling this way but I do know how you feel I would think most folks on this site have initially been fobbed of by ther doctor and been told to relax I think it is because they do not fully understand the illness and it can be variable from person to person. My IBS started when I was 18 when my father died and was told it was just nerves and pull yourself together I was just about to become a police officer and dropped out. I isolated myself from people as it was taking over my life Sorry I have no magic bullet but can say there are a lot of folks on the site who can help you through this and also have knowlege of the type of medication that may help plus diet which is a big part of controlling IBS. As for stress It has taken me a long time to get that under control but I think once the IBS becomes managable and your controlling it and its not controlling you then the stress levels do become more managable be kind to yourself treat yourself do things for yourself as we are all worth it no matter what has gone on in our past dont embrace it lock it away, think of today and what you can do to make your life fufilling you will get back to studies amd work but dont punish yourself for having to take some time out and don't punish yourself for the past either as many of us had no control of what happened in our youth.

Keep your chin up


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