# please help me im suicidal



## carli (Jan 7, 2008)

i am waiting for the camera on 23rd,and to be honest im at the end of my tether i cant mentally take any more, i look anerexic as i stopped eating and im so weak, with 2 young children. i had a tummy bug 8 months ago after having my son, this and anxiety and my life has not been the same again and i feel so alone and helpless. i havent a clue what i can eat,as im told all the things i would usually eat are bad, and some mornings im in toilet 5 times,and it burns so bad,please,any advice as to the basics of what i can eat as my doc is useless. i dont leave the house any more,and when my bf goes to work im an emotional wreck which doesnt help at all


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## carli (Jan 7, 2008)

also, will i ever enjoy a drink again? its been a miserable xmas avoiding a glass or two of wine. im on omeprazole tablets, 2 a day,since 4 months ago when i had acid biuld up, my doc just says keep taking them, i think my bowels are worse without them, how will i ever be sure? my lips go blue and even my legs and i now get back and joint pain, im 23 and feel 73!


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## Kathleen M. (Nov 16, 1999)

You might check out LNAPE's calcium thread since you mention burning with the diarrhea. That may help.Diet is often not the best treatment for IBS as a lot of times symptoms are the same no matter what people eat.Not eating at all is not a good solution. Your body needs fuel to work and starving yourself makes everything worse, both physically and emotionally.You might check out .. for some diet advice that has what TO eat rather than just what not to eat.Alcohol tolerance varies a lot with IBS, I can't make any predictions about that for you.We have a post on crisis resources here http://www.ibsgroup.org/forums/index.php?showtopic=71753Please call someone if you need help. There is only so much that can be done during a crisis by message board and the people there are trained to help those in immediate risk of harming themselves.K.


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## Tallgirl (Nov 14, 2007)

Hi Carli.I'm sorry to hear you are having such a rough time.Please get some help as Kathleen suggested if you are feeling suicidal.Everyone here understands how you feel and we are all here to listen and help as much as we can.As far as diet is concerned, I find that a low fat, bland, dairy free diet works well for me, but everyone is different so it is worth keeping a food diary to see what foods affect you. There are lots of posts about diet, so have a read through them if you can.You really MUST eat though, as if you are weak and not getting enough nutrients etc, this will make you feel ill and also it will be more difficult to 'cope' with everything.Is it possible to change to a more sympathetic doctor?Could you talk to your boyfriend? Does he know how you are feeling? Is there any family/friends that could help out with childcare occasionally?Take care and let us know how you are getting on.Tallgirl.


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## 19506 (Oct 7, 2006)

Carli - I agree with Kathleen and Tallgirl, you must reach out for help if you are suicidal. Please look at the link Kathleen posted for resources during an emotional crisis. Also since you said you got sick after having your son (I assume in a hospital) you must be aggressive in getting your doctor to look into other causes of your symptoms besides IBS. For example see www.mayoclinic.com/health/c-difficile/DS00736 for info on hospital acquired infections. Please don't despair, there are so many here who can empathize with you; you are not alone in this. Everyone is different. I find that if I avoid wheat products I have won half the battle with my digestion. Other folks must avoid dairy. You say that you have stopped eating, and that may be the cause of your pains and blue lips. You could be anemic or have some other deficiency. You could try a BRAT diet for a few days, and if that is making you sick also your doc needs to know that. It is so important to talk to your doc about everything you are going through, and if possible get another doc if yours is uncooperative or clueless.Here's a simple bit of advice for your poor burning butt: after a bm step into the shower and rinse if you have a hand-held shower head, or if not buy a flexible plastic water bottle (like bicyclists use, the kind with a pop-up lid as opposed to a screw-off kind) and rinse your bum with warm water to get the acid feeling off your skin. (Rinse from the front, aiming towards the back, to avoid potential urinary tract infections.)Also read the many posts here on this forum, there are so many here who like you have come close to giving up, but have found the help they need to deal with their condition.


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## IBD/IBS Author (May 24, 2007)

Carli,Things to eat right now while your gut is upset include:Yogurt - plain or vanilla and without artificial sweeteners like Nutrasweet, Splenda, etc - these are killers on a bad gutScrampled or poached eggsWhite riceNaked pasta - maybe a splash of olive oilToastApplesauceBananasCrackers - oyster crackers are funBaked white fish Baked chicken breastRecharge or Gatorade - drinks that will help keep your eletrolytes up. If the Gatorade is too acidic on your gut then cut it 50/50 with water.Avoid sauces, spicy or fried food, dairy products if they seem to bother you, acidic fruit and juices like orange, grapefruit, and apple. Avoid NSAIDs like Advil, Aleve, Motrin as they can cause GI problems, take Tylenol instead. Alcohol, caffeine, chocolate, can be problem foods for many, as can lettuce, onions, bell peppers, and undercooked or raw veggies - steam veggies until really tender. This is all hard, and it stinks, I know I have both IBS & IBD and I've felt how you're feeling now about ten years ago. But it can and will get better. Reach out for help like you're doing here and keep reaching until you get all the help you need for yourself and to be there for your children. You can do this.Elizabeth


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## Poo Pea 2 (Jan 4, 2008)

Hi Carli,First of all BIG ((((HUGS)))) for you, its sounds like your going through a tuff time. Carli I know it doesnt seem like it right now, but you will be ok!!!!! Think of anyone you make have in your support network and go to the one you trust most and ask them to help support you in this time. Also make a Dr appointment with a new Dr and explain that your symptoms are making you very depressed and that you need some assistance. If it is IBS the more you stress about it the worse it will get. Also try your pharmasist, they always have helpful info to pass on.As for food, these are this things i know to be safe for me (note ALL these are in small portions)- Wheat free pasta- Basmati rice- White bread- Cooked Carrots- Plain cooked chicken- Yukult- Yoghurt- Turkey breast (make a sandwich)I hope some of this helps darlz, and remember your not alone!!! If you ever need to chat we are always herePoo Pea (((hugs)))


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## carli (Jan 7, 2008)

thankyou all so much for your replies, its very comforting. i have just felt so alone as my chap not very helpful or supportive,he tries but doesnt know how and i just feel so alone. my mum fell out with me and your replies really have helped. i am eating off the lists, think when im anxious it makes things soo much worse. do you know what i can eat to get my iron up? as doc just said i cant have tablets but i get aneimic and feel pretty rubbish,i cant believe the lack of information on ibs! again,thankyou for my replies all x


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## carli (Jan 7, 2008)

also, with the cut out of fat and eating small amounts etc, how can i go about putting some weight on? thankyou


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## MissSteffie (Jan 8, 2008)

Everyone here has given such awesome responses, it helps to be around those who understand. Have you tried Immodium to help you? Start with a tablet a day to see how you react, and keep pushing your doc with ALL of your symptoms so that they can understand how you are really doing. Weight loss should be a sign to him that you need serious help here. Also, have you had any other surgeries, like a gallbladder removal? If so, you may have some complications from it. I had a C-Section followed by a gallbladder removal 6 weeks later, and my doctors think the two abdominal surgeries triggered the IBS. Keep researching and trying to find what works for you, as IBS treatments are more individual tailored.


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## carli (Jan 7, 2008)

thanks, no surgeries, just natural childbirth, followed by bug,think that brought on the ibs,with anxiety.my docs are useless,but i wont move until after my camera as i dont want to confuse it all. they have been no help what so ever and they make me feel a past really. i did have 2 weeks on antibiotics until boxing day,so maybe that it then.not sure bout immodium or any more tablets,i had that when i had tummy bug and not been right since. i have to say though, i suffer more with soft burning stools than watery,only worse when on period or anxious, rest of time its just lots of morning trips to loo, very uncomfortable, but not sure immodium make me constipated?


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## Guest (Jan 8, 2008)

God bless - it sounds horrendous - but I promise things can get better than this - though it sounds like you need another doctor - this one is clearly not much help. You are going for a proper examination and tests aren't you - well that is good - it should give you a clearer idea as to what is going on. In the meantime - do some research on the various threads on these boards. My IBS is very mild so I'm probably not much help in that direction - but I have attempted suicide and I have spent weeks in a psychiatric unit - so I have every sympathy for somebody who sounds at the end of their rope mentally.You need to be robust and proactive with your doctor - or find another one who will take you seriously - as a mum with 2 teenies - you need to be in better physical shape and its shameful that you are not getting more help.I wish I could offer you more - but in the meantime stay in touch - others on these boards will be able to give you much more concrete advice.Sue xxx


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## Kathleen M. (Nov 16, 1999)

For iron you might look at fortified cereals that you may tolerate (probably lower fiber ones if you are really feeling lousy) and small amounts of lean red meat if you can tolerate it, if not lean chicken will help. You don't really need that much meat (3 oz is a serving) and that will keep it up.People gain weight on low-fat diets all the time (gee, these cookies are non-fat I can eat the whole box). It is about total calories and portion sizes. Try increasing the portions of what you eat by small increments to increase your total calorie intake. Adding in some snacks so you get another meals worth of calories over the course of the day can help.K.


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## carli (Jan 7, 2008)

thankyou soooooooooo much to all, your advice means alot to me, and im trying to be positive as so many people seem to be doing ok,im just one of those that is mentally weak! i seen my doc today,also not much help again,and he has told me to cut down then off omeprazole so i am scared now! hope things dont get worse! never mind hey, can always start taking them again! thanks again 4 everyones advice x


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## pro211 (Nov 24, 2007)

Hi Carli ,I just wanted to say I felt exactly the same way as you do a few weeks ago . I had so much pain and I've lost over 15 pounds because I just didn't know what to eat . I had my colonoscopy a couple weeks ago and all was well so I have officially been diagnosed with IBS . I have increased my fiber , must do this slowlyand I'm feeling so much better . Normal bowels now for the most part . I still have some days that I have loose bowels but its usually if I'm very stressed or if I eat something I know I shouldn't have . For instance I made chilli yesterday and had a bit of discomfort but not nearly what it was before .I know when I was at my worst I ate a lot of rice and toast and some plain chicken breast .I have also just started with Mike's hypnotherapy CD's .Hang in there and keep us posted.Paula


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## carli (Jan 7, 2008)

thankyou thats really helpful all of you. hopefully doc will be more useful when they diagnose me properly. either that or he has no clue! pro211,you say when you was at your worst you ate alot of rice chicken and toast, thats what im trying to do at the moment. hoping it helps a little x


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

Carli, I am just posting a lot of information for you in hope that it will help. Many of us have had these thoughts , but you can feel better and have more control over IBS and your life and there are effective ways to manage IBS if indeed that is the problem. Have you had stool and blood work done yet?on diagnosing IBShttp://www.ibsgroup.org/forums/index.php?showtopic=65559also The "act of eating itself" can be a problem with IBS. Not just the foods.Dietary Measureshttp://aboutibs.org/site/about-ibs/managem...ietary-measuresYou might also keep a personal journal for a couple weekshttp://www.aboutibs.org/store/viewproduct/PDDImportant info on thishttp://www.ibsgroup.org/forums/index.php?showtopic=80198http://www.ibsgroup.org/forums/index.php?showtopic=72566Nutritional Intervention for IBS http://www.ibsgroup.org/forums/index.php?s...;hl=nutritionalThe Experts SpeakAt IFFGD's 7th International Symposium on Functional Gastrointestinal Disorders in April 2007, we had the opportunity to talk to some of the international experts in functional GI disorders. Our discussions covered some of the most recent developments in this field. Click the topic titles below to go to the video interviews!http://www.aboutibs.org/site/learning-center/video-corner/FYIIn PDF format2007 IFFGD Symposium Summary Reporthttp://iffgd.org/pdfs/SymposiumSummaryRepo...Winter_2007.pdf On IBSThe more good information you have and the more you know about all this the better. It will empower you. Your not alone either, millions have IBS. Stress is a very important factor as well as emotional wellbeing and symptoms. You may also need better doctors perhaps.


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## rockingirl (Jan 10, 2008)

I'm 22 and I totally know what you're going through. I've gotten to the point that I really don't miss alcohol anymore as that has always been a big trigger for me. I still have days where I feel like I can't go out of the house and I'm really depressed, so when i don't feel that great I rely on Immodium or Pepto Bismol and I just tell myself that there are bathrooms wherever I'm going in case I need them. I did have really bad anxiety issues with all this and I've been taking Paxil, and while it hasn't been a miracle, I can definitely tell that it has helped a little. I still get anxious in stressful situations but with the everyday things that had started to really freak me out it's a little better. Have you tried fiber pills like Citrucel?Also stress and anxiety for me can make my spells more frequent and worse so I definitely recommend talking to someone about your anxiety and ways to lessen it.


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## 16963 (Dec 5, 2006)

I'm so sorry you feel this way. IBS really has the ability to make us all feel trapped, physically and mentally. I promise, though, that it DOES get better. A year ago, I wasn't even going to school and I was working from home. I never saw my friends, and I just layed around all day feeling generally miserable for myself. Just going to the grocery store was a huge deal. I really realized how big of an improvement I've made when, this NYE, I drove 100 miles away from home to go to a big party, spend the weekend with some friends, and sip champagne all night long. Last year at that time, I was in bed by 10 and cried myself to sleep from the loneliness and depression of it all. I can truly say that a year ago was one of the darkest points in my life. I felt completely alone and helpless, with no hope and no direction. And it was all because of my IBS.This board has been more of a help than my doctor ever was. Through diet changes, supplements, medications, a few trips to a psychiatrist and tons of moral support, I'm now living a life that is almost exactly what I want. I'm procrastinating on getting a new job, I had to tell my cousin that I couldn't be her bridesmaid, and I passed up a camping trip with my friends because of my IBS. And that still depresses me. But just a few minutes ago, someone called to see if I wanted to hang out and I was able to make last-minute plans! Sure, I might have to run to the bathroom suddenly or cut the evening short. There is always a chance I could #### my pants and embarrass myself completely. But I'm still going out. And a year ago, I wouldn't have even dreamed of going out no matter how much notice you gave me.Why did your Dr say you can't take iron? just curious. I've started taking it because I'm slightly anemic and it is supposed to be constipating as well. I do really think its helping!


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## carli (Jan 7, 2008)

because iron upsets the tummy i think x


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