# New helps - FODMAPS and better diapers



## Heather1973 (Oct 1, 2013)

My name is Heather, and I've been struggling with both post-infectious IBS-D and urinary incontinence for over 5 years (I'm 40 now). I've struggled along and coped by wearing adult diapers and trying different diets. What has really helped me recently are 1) starting the FODMAPS diet and 2) trying a better brand of disposable diapers. I've worn disposable adult diapers for both my urinary incontinence and IBS-D caused incontinence for a long time. Basically, anytime I "go", I go in a diaper. Expensive? Yes! (I go through a LOT of diapers and they ain't cheap!) Messy? Yes - messy to change, and finding a place to dispose of them discreetly is hard too - but worse would be going without the protection of a diaper! Diapers allow me to lead a pretty normal life - I work, I can go where I want, and wear what I want (I love fashion and dressing nice) - I just "go" whenever my body needs to (I just need to change right afterwards). I'm a normal, petite, attractive 40 year old woman - except for my urinary and bowel issues.

But again, two things have helped me a whole bunch recently. One is the FODMAPS diet (google or look at this site). I still find it very restrictive, yet it has enough things I like to be delicious AND it's changed me from IBS-D with runny diarrhea and frequent BMs that were hard to keep inside a diaper to MUCH more solid and less frequent BMs (I usually only have a BM 2-3 times a day now, sometimes once a day - but still lots of wet changes). It used to be that I'd get a very sudden urge and instantly go in my diaper (and if the diarrhea was really bad, in my tights, and my skirt, and wherever else my diaper leaked). That was horrible. Now I get a sudden urge and moments later still have a bowel movement in my diaper but it's much more formed which makes it easier to keep inside my diaper when I'm wearing it, easier to contain in the diaper when I use the diaper to "package" the BM up for disposal in the trash, and a lot easier and cleaner to change (sorry if TMI!) And I just FEEL better with less D - less nausea, more energy - I love to exercise and now I feel like doing so every day.

The other thing that has helped me most recently is premium adult diapers. I normally wear a nationally known name brand disposable brief sold by major US retailers (Depends protection with tabs). And they worked pretty well, both for pee and BMs. Expensive but in my budget, and not too bulky or noticeable when worn under skirts or dresses with some pantyhose or tights. But they DID leak sometimes when a BM would be really messy or I'd wet a whole lot at once.

My slightly older brother (who is so sweet and supports me with my issues and helps to care of me in general - I love him so much!) recently gave me a gift of a package of Molicare disposable diapers I'd seen on the internet and he ordered for me. They're far more expensive, and have a purple plastic backing instead of the white I'd prefer, but they have good leak guards and are SOOOO comfortable. I wore them for the first time this past weekend. My brother was taking me out for dinner at a nice restaurant so I wanted to look nice so I really dressed up in a cute, new short red dress I'd bought and I decided to try my new diapers that night as well. I had splurged on some really expensive extremely sheer light colored pantyhose to wear with my dress that were so sheer that they were barely noticeable on my legs (my brother couldn't even tell I was wearing pantyhose at first until I pointed it out), but my pantyhose still had a stretchy silky panty top that gently helped compress what little bulkiness there was to my new diaper so my dress fit me perfectly even though it was close fitting with no sign of my diaper from the front or back. I was excited to go out, but nervous about wearing a new brand of diaper (I had visions of horrible leaks) as it seemed almost too comfortable to protect me well. At the restaurant as we sat waiting for a table I felt a little self conscious about just how short my dress had become when seated on a bench in front of others but I did feel gorgeous, but as we sat waiting I suddenly just totally peed. I just started going and I kept going and going. I had no idea where all of the pee was going - I just hoped it was all soaking up into my diaper as I didn't want a soaked dress in front of 50 people! My diaper felt heavy and a bit saggy (the pantyhose helped hold it in place) as I finally finished and I cautiously stood up and I excused myself to change - no leaks visible on my pantyhose and once I removed the diaper I felt totally clean and dry, though when I rolled and taped up my used diaper and placed it in the garbage it seemed to weigh 2 pounds!

My brother and I had a fantastic dinner together. I wet again during desert - again quite a bit but no leaks. Another quick change and my second purple diaper joined the first in the trash can and it was time for us to head home. I was super careful when taping on my fresh diaper to make sure everything fit perfectly before smoothing my pantyhose up over it as it's very common for me to have a BM shortly after meals and I wanted my diaper to be ready to protect me. I'd not totally followed my FODMAP rules at dinner (bad idea! L) and in my brother's SUV as he was taking me home and 5 minutes after we left the restaurant I had a severe urge and stomach cramp. I leaned forward and had an absolutely huge BM followed by explosive diarrhea. My brother and I are very close and I've messed my diaper in front of him before where he knew what I'd just done, but even so I was totally embarrassed (he heard me having the BM and then the diarrhea explosion). I was so embarrassed, sad that I'd strayed from my diet and sad to be all dressed up yet sitting in a very messy diaper in my brother's vehicle and I just started crying. He took me home making sure to hug and comfort me in the parking lot first as I was still crying (how many other brothers would hug their sister close and say "it's okay" knowing they were wearing a soiled diaper?!) and we gingerly walked into my apartment. I quickly got in the bathroom and discovered that I had NO leaks. None! My brother's gift had worked perfectly again! I did have a small leak while actually removing the soiled diaper and soiled my hose in the process so I rolled my pantyhose up in the diaper and though expensive I decided to just dispose of them rather than launder them - but I didn't ruin my new dress or my brother's seat - things could have been far worse. I love these new diapers and I feel very confident wearing them (I had a second round of bad diarrhea in a fresh diaper 20 minutes after I changed and no leaks then either). I've now worn and disposed of the package my brother gave me now but look forward to ordering more when money isn't as tight. And I am going to keep working (and trying to stick to better!) my FODMAPS diet. It really HAS helped - not just the BM frequency and consistency but nausea feelings as well - but you have to stick with it. Diapers give me freedom, but I'd love to be able to get out of using them altogether at some point using FODMAPs or other strategies.

Heather


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## HumanistRuth (Sep 19, 2013)

Thanks for sharing your dining out adventure, Heather 1973. It's quite a caution about staying on diet. A proctologist cut my outer anal sphincter, so while I'm not wearing diapers now, as I age I'm at higher risk than most. You're brave.


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## Heather1973 (Oct 1, 2013)

Thank you - though I'm not sure how brave I am. I hope you stay ok and never need diapers.

But if you do, they're not that bad. I mean they are a pain, and expensive and a pain to dispose of.

But they protect me, and nobody knows I'm wearing them except me and those closest to me (like my very close brother).

I usually wear skirts and dresses which helps to disguise a diaper, and except when it's very hot I wear pantyhose or tights which helps disguise the diaper and any sounds, and help hold my diaper snugly in place (and make my nice but pasty legs look better! 

Tonight I had stopped by my brother's after work when the urge hit, I was in his living room and stood up and found that I could actually hold it for several seconds, maybe 30 before having a large BM in my diaper. And even then it was about the most solid BM I've had in awhile! The pantyhose I was wearing with my skirt were snug and it was hard to go. That's good! More signs of progress on the diet!


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