# Missed Thanksgiving



## Steely (Nov 13, 2007)

I'm so tired of missing out on everything.I miss parties,family get togethers,beach trips.I 'm so depressed.I'm not on any meds but I think I may have to start.This has been going on for 6 months now.I don't know what to do.Even my doctor has no real idea.


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## Cherrie (Sep 1, 2006)

Hi,Sorry that it's been this long... Totally feel you about the missing out on things part...I had to cancel my original plan to travel to another state to visit friends this thankgiving weekend, although I did manage to go to a dinner party this afternoon. It was still such a pain to go through dinner not being able to eat those things that other people eat and get asked like 1000 times why i was avoiding those foods... and in the end I had to give in a little and I'm sure I'll suffer the consequence tomorrow...If you're not on meds and it's been going on for this long, you prolly want to talk to your dr and get some meds -- your dr has no real idea? that doesn't sound reassuring... Is it possible to find a new dr? or maybe you could ask your dr to prescribe an antidep, which works well for some IBSers to control their ibs?Cherrie


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## Guest (Nov 23, 2007)

Steely - first off, a warm welcome to the board.Sorry, I'm not clear from reading your post - as to exactly why you are having to miss all these events - is it because of the severity of your IBS symptoms - or is it because your mood is low, as is your self-esteem, energy levels and general "get up and go" - are you feeling increasingly isolated but lack the motivation to do owt about it - or maybe your anxiety levels are off the scale to the point where everyday pleasurable things are no longer fun and may even be things to be dreaded. Answer yes to a combination of these and yeah, if this has been going on for a lengthy period of time - I'd say you probably have a measure of clinical depression and this needs to be addressed rapidly. Your doctor may prescribe anti-depressants or may suggest alternative therapies.Whatever, you need to seek help NOW - I know about this - I suffer with chronic depression and was hospitalised for 6 weeks about 2 years' ago now. The good news - I've been well for about 20 months - work part-time and am a busy mum to 3 kids and hopefully a half-way decent wife to Paul too and I LOVE life.I've been in the deepest pit of despair, drinking out of control, too anxious to do anything, barely even to wash - cut myself off from all my dearest and nearest and everything - and I mean everything was a chore or something to be dreaded - I could not go into a supermarket without having an anxiety attack - well I could go on and on....but - this is your thread - please believe me - you are NOT alone and you WILL get better than this I promise.The important thing is you're opening up about it - even to us bods over the net.Cherrie has given you some great advice - stay in touch - we are a pretty supportive bunch over here - and all the very best to you.Sue, Manchester, UK


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## Steely (Nov 13, 2007)

Thanks,you two,I enjoy reading your posts.It's a mixture of all the things you've said Sue.This all started with an ulcer.I was diagnosed with IBS about 10 years ago but had it under contriol for the most part.Then I got an ulcer and everything went haywire. I don't usually feel like going anywhere because of the pain and the hassle.Nothing feels like fun anymore.I used to go everywhere,street fairs,movies,festivals but now it's just not worth the hassle. I can't say I'm not on any meds,they've tried Levsin but I have IBS-A and I can't go to the bathroom at all.Then it's a huge blowout.I'm also anxious about how I'm feeling all the time.I've always been very highly strung.That I think has the most to do with it but then again most of the time I can't think of anything that's stressing me out. I have an appointment on Monday with the doctor.I'm going to see if he'll put me on an anti-depressant maybe to help me deal a little better.I hope you are right and this will pass and I will feel like living again. Sue,I'm glad to hear that you came back from that dark place.I've read other posts of yours and I'm very glad that you've turned it around.All the best to you,too.Thank you both for replying.It really is a relief to be able to express how it feels and have people understand.My family has no understanding although they know something is wrong.Thanks for caring


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## MR D (Nov 4, 2007)

Hang in there, I missed thanksgiving too. Although my family is overseas, so I don't really have any serious commitments. I think I like it better that way. Got invited by a friend and just told him that I didn't feel like it (he knows I have IBS, so he understands), but it sure would be nice to have a big turkey dinner....'Happy holidays everyoned


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## Guest (Nov 24, 2007)

Oh Mr D I am sorry!!!!Steely - its my absolute pleasure and thanks for your kind comments - sorry, wasn't trying to bombard you with gruesome tales from my past - just to let you know really I do totally empathise with where you are coming from and hopefully to offer you hope.Just be robust with your doctor, work closely with him/her and hopefully soon things will be much brighter for you.Please do stay in touch - would love to know how you are going on.Sue xxx


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## Steely (Nov 13, 2007)

MR D said:


> Hang in there, I missed thanksgiving too. Although my family is overseas, so I don't really have any serious commitments. I think I like it better that way. Got invited by a friend and just told him that I didn't feel like it (he knows I have IBS, so he understands), but it sure would be nice to have a big turkey dinner....'Happy holidays everyoned


I'm sorry to hear that but I know how it feels.I really hate not being able to eat anymore.Happy Holiday back at you.


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## Steely (Nov 13, 2007)

SueV said:


> Oh Mr D I am sorry!!!!Steely - its my absolute pleasure and thanks for your kind comments - sorry, wasn't trying to bombard you with gruesome tales from my past - just to let you know really I do totally empathise with where you are coming from and hopefully to offer you hope.Just be robust with your doctor, work closely with him/her and hopefully soon things will be much brighter for you.Please do stay in touch - would love to know how you are going on.Sue xxx


Thank you so much,Sue.You've really helped me feel better,mentally anyway.


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## dgluzband (Nov 26, 2007)

Yep, I missed Thanksgiving w/my family as well. They all wanted to go upstate, but I knew I'd never make that long car ride to and from the host's house. So I didn't go and they all had fun without me. But then we had a small Thanksgiving the day after to make up for it. It's all about the compromise!


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## Guest (Nov 28, 2007)

Yeah well said Debbie - I hope you will get some sort of relief from your symptoms so that your quality of life can improve but in the meantime - yes, I suppose you have to get creative and push yourself abit so you don't miss out on everything but don't stress yourself unduly - which takes away from any enjoyment in itself.Good luck to everyone - and hope you all can celebrate Christmas with your dearest and nearest in some way, shape or form.Sue


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## Exploder (Nov 19, 2007)

Hey steely, I feel ya, I too pretty much missed thanksgiving I stayed at home while my girlfriend went to her family gathering and while she went to my moms, but luckily my mom sent some white turkey home with her so I got to eat some of it but not very much without feeling sick as usual. This stuff does get ya depressed, I finally broke down yesterday, I am a guy I don't like to cry but I did a little yesterday because this #### can be toooo much sometimes....hope you too get better good luck!


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## Guest (Nov 29, 2007)

Exploder - there's no shame in having a weep whether your a bloke or a bird - if you are p*ssed off - you've every right to express that in whatever way, shape or form best suits at the time.I'm glad you were able to enjoy at least a little turkey meat - seems so wierd to us Brits - all this Thanksgiving cellies - it was just a normal old Thursday/Friday/Weekend for us in blighty - we've got our Turkey to look forward to (hopefully - if my cooking steps up to the mark) on 25th Dec.Sue


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## Steely (Nov 13, 2007)

Exploder said:


> Hey steely, I feel ya, I too pretty much missed thanksgiving I stayed at home while my girlfriend went to her family gathering and while she went to my moms, but luckily my mom sent some white turkey home with her so I got to eat some of it but not very much without feeling sick as usual. This stuff does get ya depressed, I finally broke down yesterday, I am a guy I don't like to cry but I did a little yesterday because this #### can be toooo much sometimes....hope you too get better good luck!


I'm so sorry,Exploder.It really gets me down and I don't know what else to do but cry.I've been feeling a little bit better.I went to the doctor and he put me on a low dose of Paxil.I don't know how but I really feel better since then.Let's hope it keeps it up.


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