# pain during sex



## emmie26 (Mar 24, 2003)

hi there when my partner and i have sex we sometimes have to stop as it is painful, painful inside like hes hitting something at the top ive never had this b4 i was told i may have IBS. sometimes it is that bad i have to stop and start crying. it hasnt affected our relationship as he is very understanding but now it is making me wary of having sex at all. I dont know if this is someting that is related to IBS or not, my doctor hasnt given me any help what so ever just asked if it was sometimes painful during sex and i said yes and then that was it !! any ideas anyone or am i going mad?? love to you all Emmie xxxx


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## Guest (Mar 27, 2003)

Hi emmieWell, I think that for sure you should see your doctor or gyno about this. You shouldn't have pain any time before, during or after sex. I don't think it's IBS related but who knows. does it hurt only in one sexual position? In the mean time until you can see the DR about this maybe you can try different positions but please be sure to see your dr asap







Good luck and I wish you well.


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## sooze (Dec 8, 2002)

Hi Emmie. Please do see a gyne. There are so many different reasons for pain during sex. eg I have pain due to a skin tag, which gets caught. It could be IBS, it could be an infection which they could clear up easily. I hope you manage to find a sympathetic dr to help you sort through this ((hugs))


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## persian26 (Mar 2, 2003)

HII have pain most of the time,,like my partner is "hitting" something and sometimes when we are done my bowels feel messed up..hard to explain..I recommend going to a gyno cause sex is NEVER supposed to hurt...you could have cysts, endo, anything...and if they dont seem concerned to check you out go to another doctor!! I was 18 when I first mentioned it and I was told it was cause I was small!! Now 8 years later, I am at the gyno instead of a gastro constantly for all my problems!!


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## stuck here (Apr 5, 2003)

Emmie:I agree with the others about pushing the topic with your doctor, but it could be related. I've had a similar problem when I'm constipated. Sometimes I'm not aware that I haven't had a BM until I really thought about it. I haven't been formally diagnosed with IBS yet, but my doctor did say that pain I was feeling that I thought was gyno related was the pressure from my irritated colon. I also had I problem with incontinence when I orgasm because of this. I am the only one to have that happen


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## Guest (Apr 5, 2003)

Hi emmie,Agree that another trip to your doc might be indicated. I would go further and ask him the same questions that you are asking here.I've also had pain with sex at different times. Mine is related to IBS, but we're all different.Having an understanding partner is a real plus. And I have found that relaxation helps me with this kind of pain.I have a rectocele which pushes into the posterior wall of my vagina which sometimes causes me discomfort during sex.Also.... timing the sex at a point where my colon is fairly empty also seems to help.... but then that also can complicate spontanaeity....







The relaxation aspects help me the most and sometimes Hubby and I engage in mutual massage prior to engaging because it helps us both to relax and enjoy the intimacy even more.Hope this helps, Evie


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## Auroraheart (Aug 8, 2000)

My pain during sex was due to bacterial vaginitis which many IBS women have. It causes pain for me during PAP smears too.


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## poopster (Oct 21, 2000)

I have the same exact problem. Glad to hear I am not alone. I went to the GYN last week about it.She even hit something when she inserted the speculum (sp). She did an internal exam and said it is my bowels. My bowels are so full that they are pushing up against the back of my vaginal wall so when I have sex that is what is being hit. I has even having some bleeding after sex. Just spotting but noticable. She said that an abrasion was being created where I was being hit inside. Bizarre isn't it? I also went to my gastro. He said yes, that could happen in IBS patients. I want it to go away!


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## J Schuck (Apr 2, 2003)

Emmie - I'm sorry to hear you have this problem, but remember that a LOT of women have experienced pain at one time or another during sex.Personally, I hate to graphic here, but I find if I am bloated from gas, I have issues with penetration. Gas that cannot be dispelled (sorry) and that causes bloating in my intestines.. makes it feel like my partner's genitalia is hitting my cervix or something. Its almost like I can put my hand on my stomach and feel where its hitting.I know that's not true but that's happened.I also want to ask about something sort of personal, like the size of your partner. Is he larger than most? I found that to be a major factor for me comparing my current partner and previous few. We have to use a variety of positions so that he can enter without causing discomfort. Finding a partner who's comfortable dealing with this problem and doing what he can to help you is key.Plus, just like my IBS, the more I think about it hurting the more it will. Deep breathing, maybe a glass of wine, just until you can get to the doctor and have him/her check it out.Don't give up. Its another cross for women to bear, but your doctor should be able to help. ok?Let us know what happens. Its good to know for the rest of us. God bless.Win


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## Tlyon (Feb 20, 2001)

I cannot believe this question was on here! I have been miserable since Saturday. I must have been C, and then the sex, and it totally messed me up. Only started feeling better today. I didn't call the doctor, because I kind of figured that it was because my bowels were full and were "getting hit" it also felt like it packed everything in there even tighter. Wow, who knew? Feel better now that I am not alone. I hate this crummy IBS. I am mostly D, and frankly I would rather have that then C. My whole torso feels twisted when it happens.


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## Sonlee (Jun 10, 2003)

I have the same problem but I went to the doctor and they told me that there was nothing wrong with me and that it is my IBS, which did not and does not make me feel better. My partner is is sympathetic but it is difficult as you can feel that you are not normal and that you are unable to please your partner.


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## KLG (Jul 8, 2002)

I have to get checked out further, but sometimes ...depending on if my IBS is bad..it hurts, I feel like crying/screaming in pain. The position depends too. Bottom is worst (sorry I dont mean to get too graphic here, just maybe if they don't find anything you can consider that.)


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## Wes and Tracy (Apr 14, 1999)

Aprehension about pain, can cause you to be more tense. If you're waiting for that pain and focused on when/if it's going to happen it can leave you pretty stressed out about the whole event. We went through this for years. It can have a physiological effect, you're not as moist, the muscles are tense and contracted, etc, it's not conducive to good sex. Try to relax before hand, maybe a glass of wine if you're able, being on top puts you in a better position to control angle/speed/depth and it gives you a sense of control which can help you relax, you're not laying there wondering if he's going to thrust deep and hit something sensitive.Wes


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## katjam (Jun 5, 2003)

Ask your gyn to check if you have a tilted uterus. Mine wasn't discovered until after I had my first child. I didn't start having pain until then either. Putting a pillow under my backside during sex seems to help, along with trying other positions.


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## poopster (Oct 21, 2000)

I ended up having surgery for my bowels. When they got in they found out that I have endometriosis. It is wrapped around my rectum,ovaries, cervix and colon. It is puching against the vainal wall, that is why sex is painful. 1 in 5 women have it. You should suggest you get checked.


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## MCOwens (Jun 9, 2003)

I have never had sex yet- I am only 18. I have IBS, does this mean sex will hurt for whenever I have sex? God I hope not


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## poopster (Oct 21, 2000)

MCOwens....No, don't worry about that. I have been having sex for over 20 years and just now started with the pain. Turned out it wasn't from IBS anyway. Don't worry and good for you for waiting.


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## Engine23 (Nov 19, 2002)

Ladies I cant understand the problem you have but I have two ideas...one I thought of when reading Wes's reply about self lubrication....you may feel ready but why not try a personal lubricant like KY silk or something similar...My other suggestion would be to try a sponge (kinda like a pillow for your tummy)Also dont forget there are many ways for us to please each other (men/women) w/o penile penetration.


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## Wes and Tracy (Apr 14, 1999)

Mcowens, Congrats on waiting, good for you.Wes


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## Miserabella (Aug 21, 2003)

OK, the comment about the sponge being a pillow for your tummy actualy made me crack a smile! This is a huge deal considering the pain I have been in for days now...smiles don't come as easily! Pain during sex...YES YES YES (thought I'd try a lil humor







)...I have noticed this on and off, but mostly when I am (a) off BC pills and/or (







very constipated and/or © when i am "on top" and he's well endowed! I am quite sure its IBS related...but I have also been told I may have endometriosis...I guess I get the best of both worlds...lucky me!


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## asian_girl (Aug 22, 2003)

hey emmie, i have the same problem too. when i have sex w my bf, it feels like hes hitting it too hard. he jokes around, saying that he cant help it if hes hung...lol. but i think alot has to do with ibs. ibs is a messed up thing to have...it makes you delay life. so i only have sex...once a week...maybe


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## Wes and Tracy (Apr 14, 1999)

Miserabella, (love that name by the way, very smart)That sounds like classic 'endo' pain if you ask me. Tracy (my wife)described it like someone was taking a pair of pliers, reaching into lower belly, and pinching her inside and then twisting it. If that's not foreplay then.....seriously, there are ways to cure endo, and get rid of this pain, I wish more woman would check into natural endo relief. I personally believe that a lot of woman who have been diagnosed with IBS have endo instead.Wes


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