# 22 and feeling ashamed.



## ppretty_poisonn (Jul 14, 2003)

Hi everyone. My name is Ashleigh and...I'm new. Lately i have been feeling horribly depressed about my IBS situation. I have been IBS-D for nearly 7 years now and I have the weirdest cycle. I could be fine for months, and then go through a horrible stage for weeks or even months. IBS has had a real impact on my relationships and things I enjoy doing, simply because I'm too scared to go out in case I have an attack, or don't want to have sex with my boyfriend because I'm crampy or 'not feeling well'.It's the worst, ever. I wonder if any of you out there have been cursed and brought into the wonderful world of hemmorhoids? I think, well...almost positive I have one and to be quite honest, I feel embarassed and ashamed...I don't want to go to the doctor. This has had a major impact on my last relationship. I never wanted to have sex because I'd be sore down there, or really embarassed to have my boyfriend look anywhere near that area. Is there ANYONE out there that has gone through this? I don't know what to do







Lately I've been going through a stage of 'chapped ass' syndrome. Sorry to be so vulgar, but it's the absolute worst.







I'm a young, attractive woman that is constantly angry, upset, and depressed. I don't know what else to say....Ashleigh


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## angylroses (Feb 27, 2003)

Hi Ashleigh, welcome to the boards!







I haven't had any hemmroids, but I certainly understand the bad days/weeks/months that you're going through. I'm currently going through a bad month too where nothing I do seems to help. Sometimes you just need to ride it out and make sure you stick to a bland diet for a couple days before you start introducing other foods to it.Have you been diagnosed with IBS yet? I'd definately go to the doctor about your hemmroids. He can probably make them feel better and lessen the embarassment with your boyfriend!Sorry, would write more but in a rush. Feel free to post anytime you're feeling down or even when you're feeling up. That's what we're here for.


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## DrDevil (May 31, 2003)

get some anusol cream/suppositories for your hemhorroids, they should help clear them up, if they dont in a few weeks, see your doc


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## ppretty_poisonn (Jul 14, 2003)

Thank you very much for the comforting words.I was diagnosed with IBS-D when i was 18. The doctor tested me for everything *and I mean EVERYTHING* under the sun - even colonoscopies and sigmoidoscopies *sp* and that seemed to be the only reason for the symptoms I was having.I've tried all the over the counter hemmorhoid relief creams but nothing seems to be helping. Although I guess if I were extremely strict about using it, I wouldn't be feeling near as much discomfort.


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## erin5983 (Mar 25, 2003)

I'm sorry you're not feeling so great







. That cycle thing is a problem, and it bothers me too...for weeks I'll be fine, and then I'll hit a bad week where nothing feels right. I hate how everything can be fine all of a sudden and then the next minute, nothing is. Don't be afraid of posting anything-- there's always answers somewhere.


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## lindsay* (Jul 23, 2000)

i second the anusol sugguestion. i told my GI doc about the pains in my bottom and they were fissure and hemroids.. i know it sounds gross and is embarrassing, but it hurts so bad.. and doctors have seen everything. try to ask you doctor about getting that cream prescribed.my situation has been pretty much exactly like yours, right down to the amount of time i've had ibs. i can definately feel your pain.


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## Tamgirl21 (Sep 2, 2001)

Hi Ashleigh, I just wanted to let ya know, you aren't alone. I'm 23 and I've had IBS for about 7 years too and it is just horrible. I can relate to being mad, depressed and upset about it. I go through that all the time and its effected my relationships with friends and guys. I mean how do you tell your friends you don't want to go to a club b/c you may be back and forth to the bathroom!!!! Anyways, you should see your doctor if you are still having the hemmroid problem! I was afraid to say D in front of my GI doctor and I'm sure he hears that a million times a day! But trust me, they've seen it and heard it all. Good luck!


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## jamiethorntonlewis (May 22, 2002)

Dear Ashleigh,You must realise that you want to feel better than this. I totally understand not wanting to see the doctor thing. I won't go there for anything anymore since IBS. But I reckon you have got to spend the next 2-3 months searching for something that helps you. There will be something out there that will help you a little and you just need that turn of luck.I think the relationship thing is extremely hard, I would suggest that many of the young people on the young adults board find this is so form reading other people's posts, I know I do. Apologies for all those taht have no problems with relationships (lol).If you want to you can email me.i hope you feel betterJamie


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## ppretty_poisonn (Jul 14, 2003)

Thank you all SO much. It's great *and unfortunate at the same time* to hear that people have the same issues and have or are going through the same stuff. I've made an appt to see my doctor about my bum issue. finally! After having every kind of scope known to man done - can you believe I'm embarassed to see my doctor about a measley little hemmorhoid? I'm nuts!


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## LexiP (Apr 29, 2003)

Hi Ashleigh,I like how your name is spelled, so elegant!I have never had hemmoroids, thank goodness so far. But I do understand the chapped ass feeling. I started using Feminine wipes when I had a UTI. While I don't think they mattered at all for the UTI, they were extremely helpful in preventing the chaffing!! It feels a little weird at first because you end up with a damp bottom for a few minutes, but it's so much more soothing then wiping with dry toilet paper, that often feels like sandpaper when we are already irritated!Maybe that will help you out, but definitely check for the doctor if you have more concerns.Also, the feminine wipes may be what helps you feel "clean enough" to enjoy sex with your boyfriend. It cleanses instead of just wiping. I used to always figure out some way to wash myself down there...like come in after dinner and "HAVE" to take soaky bath before playing around.Now I just use the wipes.But if you aren't feeling good, and are crampy, then let your boyfriend know. Sometimes the stress of thinking you must perform makes things worse! Just enjoy your future boyfriend(s)' company, and let him adore you.







~Alexis


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## LHR (Jul 9, 2003)

it seems to be different for everyone but my hemmorhoids went away when i stopped eating dairy products. fissures were also helped by that.. seems corn chips can cause fissures for me too.... ..


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## ppretty_poisonn (Jul 14, 2003)

Well. I've made an appt to go in and see my doctor. First thing this morning I noticed a lot more bleeding - bright red though...and I've read that that is usually due to hemmorhoids. May I be ignorant and ask what exactly a *fissure* is? I'm not sure I even know what one would be







Thank you for all of your helpful advice.







Ashleigh


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## lindsay* (Jul 23, 2000)

Ashleigh,a fissure is just a tear. like a cut in your bottom. it can cause bleeding. they hurt!


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## ppretty_poisonn (Jul 14, 2003)

Well then I'm sure I have some of those. :S


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## Nikki (Jul 11, 2000)

I thought i had a fissure, and went to the doctors today. I was SOooooo embarrassed about it. But i sucked it up and told her about my sore bum. Turnes out that i had a small hem that was bleeding because it had a small tear in it. It MAY just be a hem that is causing your problems. But believe me, you will feel so much better when you just ask the doctor. How bad could it be? I almost cried when she told me it was nothing! lol. So relieved.Definately talk to your doc. There are loads that can be done.Nikki


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## Engine23 (Nov 19, 2002)

Hi Ashleigh,I would love to tell you these check ups get easier as you get older but I am 32 and still can not stand to have my back side checked.I think we get used to the idea of others checking out or frontal equipment cause we need to have fun sometimes but there is still some taboo associated with the back door.


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## ppretty_poisonn (Jul 14, 2003)

Thank you all SO much for your input, comments, and help. My appt isnt until next Tuesday...but I'll be sure to let you know how it went. Nervous but hey...what can you do!







Ashleigh


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## Ynaffit (Jul 19, 2003)

I'm 20 years old and going on my third year of this. What you said about being fine for months and then having it act up for weeks at a time is exactly what I experience. I feel your pain. =


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## *Luna* (Nov 19, 2001)

I'm 25 now, but have had IBS-D for years. When I was 21 or so I finally went to the doctor about my fissure. Turns out I had hemmies too. They gave me some good cream for it. I think the stuff they gave me was to be used for a short time period to promote intensive healing, but could actually weaken the area if I used it longer than recommended. Just something to be aware of with various creams...read the enclosed info







Ashleigh, to be frank, unless your boyfriend is doing a rectal exam he probably won't notice your hemmies. Our buttholes tend to stay nice and puckered up so even if bf is up close and personal with your frontal nether regions he probably still won't notice.








If you don't feel good there are plenty of ways you can enjoy each other, non-sexual and sexual, that won't aggravate your IBS so bad. Don't feel bad if you're not up for everything. If he loves you he'll deal







For that sore bum, I strongly recommend using the softest toilet paper possible, if you aren't already. I particularly like cottenelle with aloe for those really bad butt days. I don't use the moist wipes, but I know a lot of people like them. I've also found that refining your wiping technique can help...figured this out during my colonoscopy prep. Doing more patting than wiping when you have liquid D helps keep your butt from getting as chapped.Don't be afraid to bring in some good TP to work and tuck it in a cabinet. I've found I'm not the only one at work who does this







Our TP isn't as bad as some can be. And when I was in college, lots of people had their own TP supply since the dorms bought the cheapest stuff possible, of course.My BB mama figure BQ recommends "duct tape for the butt" aka hydrocortisone cream, for that chapped rear. It sure can be soothing. Be careful to read the tube... I think that is one of those creams you shouldn't use for more than a few days.


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