# So darn confused...



## abbiesmommy (Oct 28, 2003)

Well, hello again to all I have seen before. Here's my sad update:I have been taking the calcium that some of you have raved about and it has had really no effect. I also take metamucil everynight (2 tabs) and I admit that that does have a nice effect (making me go at about the same time every day with a solid consistency). I have STILL however been suffering. Why you ask?Well, I have been doing some soul searching and have discovered (after reading most of the posts on here)that I am not suffering from this constant diarhea that you all describe. I have had about 3 episodes of horrible "peeing out your bum" diarhea since this all started 6 months ago. Other than that I have not had what I would call diarhea at all. Instead, what I am suffereing from is this:This overwhelming sense of fear - making it impossible for me to go out in public or anywhere where there is not a bathroom, on a long drive, etc. I am nearly positive that this fear stems from the three episodes that I have suffered (which are as of yet unexplained) and are always in my mind. Now, when I DO go out this is what happens - I get in the car, the closer I get to the grocery store, lets say, the more my belly sdtarts acting up. I get there, get baby out of car seat, start walking into store, get one aisle in and BANG - get the urgency feeling. I can usually speed thru grocery store - get all my grocerys quickly (15 mins) and speed out of there without having to use potty, but - as soon as I am back in car - feeling goes away. I am fine. Now, I know alot of you would say that this is anxiety in my head - and I would agree - except that there have been times (yesterday) when the same thing happens - except I CANT wait - I go find a potty and really DO have to go (not diarhea - solid). So, now I know that this is not all in my head. I feel ver confused - is this a physical ailment or a psychological ailment? I wish I could find the answer because I really used to love shopping - it was even a stress reliever for me. I long for the days when I could go to a dentist appt without having to confide in him my bowel issues so he can let me out of the seat if necessary. I have also been having some other symptoms as well - I have had blood in my stool periodically (about 2-3 times a week)that shows as tissue/chunks of maroon colored masses; I have lost 15 lbs in the last 2 months without dieting, I have been recently suffering from heavy chest (hard to breathe) and constant tiredness and fatigue. I feel like everything is a workout. I have been extra moody - crying a lot and blowing up about small things. i am really at a loss and was just hoping for others feedback. I have gone to see a GI who says (after colonoscopy) it is IBS, did a follow-up with PCP (because I didnt believe GI) and he just blew me off without so much as an exam - telling me to stick with the metamucil and dont take calcium, he wouldnt prescribe questran (told me it was just like metamucil anyway), and wouldnt prescribe anti-anxiety meds (says i am too young - 25). I am currently researching therapists in the area so I can hopefully get some mind relief if nothing else!Well - sorry so long - guess I had a lot on my mind! Lemme know what you think. Thanks in advance.Abbiesmommy


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## mdonbru (Oct 15, 2003)

Abbiesmommy-I'm so sorry to hear that you are feeling so bad. I don't know a whole lot medically about all this, but it seems like your doctors are really missing something here!!! Blood 2-3 times a week seems like it's not consistent with IBS (I don't know that for sure, so if I'm wrong please don't attack me!). I would definitely find a different doc and try to get another opinion. If you feel in your gut you are not being propery diagnosed you probably aren't. Please keep us posted.  Marty


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## abbiesmommy (Oct 28, 2003)

Thanks so much for your reply.I am certainly feeling in my gut a lot of confusion...not sure WHAT is wrong with me.I really appreciate your "listening" to my words and story.Best to you~Abbiesmommy


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## california123 (Jun 8, 2003)

A number of your symptoms sound like anxiety--panicky feeling, heavy breathing, erratic BMs, and fear of driving/stores. I went through all of that in my late 20s and was diagnosed with panic attacks. Since I belonged to a good HMO, I was able to see a therapist who worked with a psychiatrist. I was put on an anti-anxiety med--at that time it was Valium--and it controlled the symptoms very quickly. Then over the course of 9 months, as I talked about problems and learned to work through the anxiety, I tapered off the valium and kep it only for emergencies--maybe twice a year when traveling. Fast forward to the present and I started having that chronic D. As you know, I take Xanax to control the D along with Effexor XR which has really improved my whole outlook on life and my ability to deal with stress of elderly, demented parents. (My father has had two TIAs in the past month, one day in the ER, and my mother called last week to say she was "trying to get the alligators out of her room." That's fairly typical right now, and all the relaxation technqiues just don't work for me. anxiety comes and goes so what may cause a frantic need to go one day maynot be the same the next Take care


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## abbiesmommy (Oct 28, 2003)

Thanks California123 for your response. I have suffered with depression about 4 years ago and so I know that part of what I am feeling (the disorganized thoughts, hoplessness, uncontrollable emotions, etc) are signs that my depression is coming on again. I was put on Zoloft when I had the last episode and it worked great - was able to be off meds within a year. However, I do not remember if there were any diarhea side-effects from the meds back then - as bowel movements were not a prevalent part of my life or worries back then. So now I am afraid to get on anything for fear they will comound my bowel/urgency feelings. I think "well, if it is psychological then the meds will stop the urgency" but then i think " well, if it is physiological then the meds will worsen the condition". Stuck in a rut of what to do.Thanks again for your input.


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## california123 (Jun 8, 2003)

Hi abbiesmom,My psychiatrist specifically picked the Effexor because it has been shown to be more likely to have a constipating effect than the opposite and that seems true for me. However, it's the Xanax that stopped the D and the panic attacks so it is hard to sort it all out. But definitely no D returned when I added the Effexor--and the Effexor gave me back a positive outlook on life...what a change. Best of luck to you.


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