# 3 Months Today...



## BQ (May 22, 2000)

Sorry if I'm harping on this too much...I just thought, well, it is still so heavy on my heart, maybe you all could help me with this load of grief. I know no one wants to even think about stuff like the terror tragedy anymore, especially with the holidays coming up... but for some of us here... it is inescapable.I can hardly believe it _is_ 3 months. I feel as though I've aged three times that amount in that short time. I know my husband is showing the signs of the strain and really struggling at times to just get done all that needs to be done at work. He will never be the same man. Some of that is a good thing and some of it is not so good. Today will be hard for him, very hard. He will be "thanked" for just doing his job during this nightmare. He doesn't do well when folks thank him. It is very hard for him to accept. I guess because he feels he couldn't help enough... which is utter nonsense, but a feeling none the less. He said, "I couldn't fix it for these people"... (family members, emer. personnel etc) No hon, ya can't, but you certainly supported them so that maybe they could go on...I'm so proud of him.... and honored to be his wife.BQ


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## Maedchen (Jun 3, 2000)

I'm sorry BQ that you are still hurting so much. Here are some <<Hugs>> for you and for your husband. I'm sure he doesn't want to hear anymore thank you's (I have a hard time with compliments and thank you's too), but you can tell him "Thanks" from someone half way across the country. It is good to know that there are people out there that have the strength and compassion to help others through so much pain. And, that they have someone special, like you, supporting them.


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## cookies4marilyn (Jun 30, 2000)

Hi BQ, First of all (((((HUGS))))). You and I have talked about this before, but I truly believe that in spite of all the horror that you are dealing with, that you and your dear hubby have been chosen to do this work, and you to support him. Not everyone is suited to the task of comforting those who are left after the unthinkable thing that has happened. It is too much to comprehend, but when you look over at your hubby with love and concern and care, you know why he is doing this and why you are his.The fact that you write this shows yet again your caring and compassion. No one in this country, no matter how "hard-boiled" we pretend to be, has not been touched by it in some way. We are all forever changed...forever changed. Just as our parents had the depression and WWII, just as all mankind has gone thru man's inhumanity to man; it leaves its mark. And on you and your hubby, and others like you, it is the mark of humility, compassion and being a member of the human race.So kudos to you, BQ, and kudos to Mr. BQ and those like him... God's blessings... and our love to you..  ~ Marilyn


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

MChen and Marilyn,Thanks for your thoughts, words and  .Yet again, those not seen but felt have helped me and my husband. I am so very grateful.














BQ


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## eric (Jul 8, 1999)

BQ, sorry I missed this yesterday. I hope you and your husband are okay.Here is something for you both. Dr Wayne Dyer on Terrorist Attack 9/11/01 I have found that reciting the St. Francis prayer is a powerful way to bring a spiritual presence to the "problem" that exists in the minds of most of us since the catastrophic events of 9/11/01, this prayer offers a Spiritual Solution as well. Lord, make me an instrument of your peace; where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy; Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood, as to understand, to be loved as to love; for it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. It is in the words of this 800 year old technology for problem solving, spoken by a saint who walked among us, that we find our way out of this confusion and bitterness. This prayer formed the basis for my writing There's a Spiritual Solution to Every Problem. I urge you to recite this prayer of St Francis several times a day and act upon its inherent wisdom. In Love and Light Dr. Wayne W. Dyer


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## linda2001 (Apr 14, 2001)

BQThinking of you and your family. Linda


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## Michael Mahoney (Oct 11, 2001)

Hi all,BQ, The simplest thing to say is that it will pass and he, like others affected will adapt and move on. However it is never easy, it is a trudge, for some it will be a nightmare for a long time, for others they will, move on a bit quicker, we all find our way.I often see people who have been hit by tragic events, man made or natural. I often too see the strength of the human spirit, the caring and outpouring of love and support that seems to come from even some of the most hardened people.For those of us with a faith we are carried in those difficult times, for others they find their own ways but still carried too.We find that we can't understand the sense, and usually there is no sense to be made of events.However, we all make a contribution to the healing, your husband did his part, his contribution helped, and he will have helped people he doesn't know, or will ever know and he did his bit.The next test for him is to move on and perhaps this will be even harder than his rushing in and helping when he did. But he must be the kind of man that will be able to do, he has too, for he and you and all of us will move on, not nor ever forgetting, but moving on into our own future, and hopefully some where in the future we can have peace and trust and happiness.Until that time, we support each other, rally round and remember not only the bad times, but how good life is, to feel the wind, and rain and see the sun and all the millions of other wonderful things we are given in life.My respect and love to you bothMike


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## AZmom1 (Dec 6, 1999)

BQ,Sept. 11th has made us all discover and appreciate the heroes around us, and your husband is one. He has done a difficult job taking care of the victims in this tragedy. He deserves the thanks and admiration of us all.







AZ


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## BQ (May 22, 2000)

Thanks all... You are all such a support to us. We have lived as best we could and done not so bad. I think we have done better partly because of the support we have received here.







Eric that prayer has sustained me through so many rough times. It has been repeated here for sure. And it has been sung too. I truly think my hubby's work brings this prayer alive. We try and we are trying to teach our kids, to live our life in the way this prayer states. So thanks Eric & all for all of the last words of each line in the first stanza.







Linda, Thanks! Your thoughts and the thoughts of others mean so much.Mike your words are filling me with hope & encouragement. I mean I knew that we would go on, and we are, just a step at a time. We are moving further along our path. We are soul tired, so we are going easy. But your words are saying to me, "how fast" doesn't matter, as long as we are continuing to step forward; which I believe we are. It is just that sometimes, especially when one is tired, one needs to lean on something, or better yet, _someone_ to rest and get refreshed to continue the journey. You all have been letting us lean on you here and get renewed to go on and we are so very grateful. With respect & love right back to you.







AZ you are so right. These times do have a way of making our perceptions crystal clear. The fog lifts...we see what is and who is important with amazing clarity. That perception has been painful in a way.... because some of those we thought were important, turn out not to be. And yet, some real "family" came out of the mist to embrace us and help us along the path. They were our shining stars that brought the warmth of light to the suffocating darkness. (You all are included in our group of stars.) Those 'stars' have already brought us back to the feelings of peace, trust & happiness.Thank you for living the Prayer of St. Francis for us.  BQ


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