# Why cant i get over my anxiety and depression



## cherrypie09

HiJust need a moan, sorry folks.I am on Mirtazapine 30mg for anxiety and depression, my IBS-D plays a v. big part in this. ive been on mirtazapine now for nearly six weeks, i had started to see a bit of improvement in myself, but since the weekend i feel so uptight, anxious, and realy like i am going crazy, i dont know what to do, i try to keep busy, but it doesnt help, I see the doctor from mental health on thursday, i hope she can help, i cant go on much longer feeling like this.


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## Kathleen M.

Some people need therapy and medication to get better.If it were so darn easy to just will ourselves out of these problems everyone on the planet would be happy all the time. There are lots of factors that make you feel the way you do right now. It can take working on all of those (medications to work on the biological imbalances, therapy to change the long ingrained thought habits, etc).Sometimes people don't get the right dose of the right medication on the very first try. It would be great if that were the way it always worked, but it can take trying different things before you find the right medication and right dose. You are not a failure just because a certain dose of a given medication didn't make you 100% well by the 6 week mark when these things usually start helping.Progress to feeling better is never a straight line where every day is much better than the day before. You will still have good days and bad days. Try not to be hard on yourself if you have a bad day or two. That getting upset with yourself can be part of how the depression and anxiety try to keep going even when you are doing things that make you feel better on most days.


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## Guest

Well hun - give yourself a chance - you've just had an horrendous experience in hospital - you may well be reeling from the "aftershock" of all of that - it'd be enough to make the most stable person unwell. 6 weeks is still fairly early days - if you are generally feeling abit brighter I'd definately stick with the programme - have a chat with the doc, air your concerns - I'd be inclined to make a note of any questions you want to ask - that way you get the best out of the appointment.I'm on 30mg mitrazapene as well - take heart - for 3 years' I've enjoyed the best mental health probably throughout my adult life and I'm an old bat of nearly 47. If you want to PM me, you know where I am.Sue xxxx


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## CatUK

So sorry you are having a rough time with it. 6 weeks is still reasonably early days with medication and as you've seen some improvement it looks like they could be starting to work (I stopped mine after a month because I saw no improvement and felt worse than ever). I don't have any tips on coping with anxiety as I still struggle myself but sometimes I tell myself off because there is no reason to be anxious, sometimes it works to calm me down others times it doesn't (evenings are worst for me). If you want to chat you know where I am


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## Guest

Cat - I'm sorry to hear you are still struggling - are you managing to keep busy, to have things to occupy yourself - it does no good to brood.Sue xxx


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## cherrypie09

HiI am having therapy and medication, i am doing CBT, I try to keep as busy as i can, but this bloody IBS-D is so bad that going out and doing things takes alot of planning with the immodium. My worse time of day is the day time. If only i felt well and did not have any illnesses as well as IBS-D i wouldnt be so down and anxious. (Iknow its a vicious circle)


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## Guest

Yes and thats the trouble Cherry - anxiety never helps anything - particularly your bowels and digestive system - but trying to find coping strategies is obviously easier said than done. How are you getting on with CBT - I've heard very mixed reports about it - still, you are lucky to have access to it - when I was desperately ill with chronic depression - there was a waiting list of 18 months. Presumably its getting to ways of coping with your situation - I don't know whether its helping - is it?Sue xxx


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## cherrypie09

Hi SueI am doing the Beating the Blues CBT on the computor as your right the waiting list for the CBT with the mental health nurse is months. Some of it is good, some confusing, and some not really relevant to my type of anxiety, its difficult to channel thoughts and look at alternative mood thoughts when its your health.


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## Guest

Obviously I was at the "suicide" end of depression which thank god you're not luv - however, the one thing I found initially that helped me in the nut-house (forgive me bluntness - my mum hates it when I call it that) was meditation - I can't really go into details here, nor am I qualified to do so - but I found visualising a box where I could put all unhelpful and toxic thoughts was very effective. I still have "black dog" days - mercifully very rarely nowadays but its an exercise I use from time to time - or when I can't sleep right well.Its a long, slow and bloody exhausting process, nursing yourself back to good mental health - but you WILL get there, promise. Do you have a good support network? I found the most unlikely folk popped out of the woodwork and did amazing things - when I was feeling gruesome - I really did count my blessings - my wonderful husband, family and friends - they were like a fantastic strong mesh net and encapsulated the family - I really don't know if I'd be here today if it wasn't for those people.Sue xxx


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## cherrypie09

I have been on the suicide side 4 years ago, ended up in hospital took an overdose, i frightened my closest friend, she found me. My husband is very good, and i have 1 good friend, but my family are all quite old and my 2 children, well, one lives in bristol aged 28, the other 26 lives near me, but they are both boys and dont really understand, i do feel quite alone, my husband is finding it very stressful trying to cope with me, but does his best and i think my doctor is getting fed up of seeing me.


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## Guest

Thats a tough call for you luv. As to the doctor - if he's worth his salt he'll take you seriously. I'm assuming you are extremely anxious about your physical health too - I certainly was - I used to troop into the GP surgery just about every month with some new scare or another. I'm now much more pragmatic about things - I think when you've had 6 weeks in a psychiatric wing with torches shone in your face every 15 minutes and not being able to take a ladyshave into the bathroom - you become abit more laisez faire about things - but you've had an awful time of things recently - so don't be hard on yourself, give the meds time to work, peg away with the CBT.One thing my GP and psychiatrist said (when I was under one) - "little baby steps" - you cannot expect to be well at the snap of your fingers - just keep plugging away. I do think its bloody tough on the other one in a relationship where somebody is battling with mental health demons - so try to remember that too - not easy I know. My husband was a bloody rock - but things took their toll after I was well again - he was understandably completely neurotic about me going anywhere and used to manically ring me about every 1/2 - we very nearly came unstuck - but we're hanging in there 22 years' of marriage later.Its a tough old road you are going down - I'm here if you want to PM me - cos I really have been there got the t-shirt.Sue xxx


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## cherrypie09

I have been for a bit of pampering. I have had my hair cut and coloured, very nice it looks too. I needed that. Today has been a little better, one of my better days for a while. I see the doctor from mental health tomorrow, i usually find its a waste of time, she doesnt say much, just how have you been, have you thought of suicide this week. I see the nurse from mental health on tuesday, i get a better response from her and shes interested in my paper work on the weekly tasks i do that i take to show her from the computor CBT im doing.Cat. How you doing, how did you get on with the big list you took to the doctors. ??


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## Guest

Oh Cherry - HOOOOOOGE fan of a great haircut - does wonders for the soul - well done you. That seems abit lame "have you any thoughts of suicide" - god on a bike - I think I could do better than that. If you have an ally in your CMN - make use of her. I'm a great believer in having a support "team" - and thats basically whoever steps up to the plate - I have my sister, my cousin, obviously my close family, my boss, a fantastic mate Sue who was a complete rock when I was in the nuthouse and Mark over here who has been the most fantastic mate I could ever wish for - bless him. When I'd just come out of hospital - a wonderful woman from an organisation called "Making Space" came - she was really there for the kids but actually became a real confidant, particularly for Paul and bless her, still rings from time to time to make sure we're all OK. You get to know who is "there" for you don't you.Sue xxx


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## cherrypie09

Yes Sue you do, but for a Mental health doctor to say that though, doesnt give you much confidence does it, she is so young as well, doesnt look no more than early twenties, or i am getting old at 49, i feel older sometimes.


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## Guest

I think age is irrelevant - the very best and most approachable bod in the nuthouse was a nursing auxilliary in her mid 20's - she was pierced all over and had bright blue hair - she was bloody wonderful - particularly in the early days when frankly I was madly ill and medicated up to the eyeballs - you've either got it or you haven't though its disappointing in somebody who is presumably highly qualified (and presumably well paid to boot).Sue


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## cherrypie09

HiI have been to see the doctor at the mental health today, it was the usual, How are you, Have you had any suicidal thoughts recently, have you had any upsets, whats causing you to be anxious more than usual, and No she wont up the Mirtazapine( i am on 30mg) She wants me to concentrate on the beating the blues cbt on the computor and to work through it, i told her i wasnt sure if it was helping, as i sometimes dont know how to work on the tasks, i only occasionally get 1 phone call a week, when someone asks how i am getting on.


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## Guest

Well frankly duck - she sounds about as much use as a chocolate teapot. I think to try and get the best of sessions with her - you need to arm yourself with some specific questions - at the end of the day what do YOU want to get out of the sessions. If you are more specific about side-effects, time-scales and other coping strategies, perhaps she'd be more helpful - though, frankly I rather doubt it.I'm sorry - but what chuffin' use is a computer programme - you need human interaction and proper medication. I know I only got well cos I had 6 weeks away from the world - I'm not suggesting you need such extreme measures - but have you looked at local resources - there maybe a local support group - I briefly joined one - really to try and put summat back after all the support and help I'd received in the psychiatric unit. You want to see whats on offer - not necessarily medically - but see whats about.I'm not sure upping the dose would help - 30mg is a fairly reasonable dose anyway and anything further might do as much harm as good with side-effects and the like - I'm not medical - so I might be wrong but you need to try and be proactive and go armed with questions the next time you see this person.Good luckSue xx


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## Kathleen M.

To be fair, with CBT a lot of the work is done outside of the session with specific homework. Some people can learn the techniques from a book or computer program. The therapist can help a lot in listening to the problems and selecting the exercises, but there are some pretty standard ones they all use and I can see where a DIY could be of some use. May not be enough for some people, but it can do some people a lot of good.It may be worth seeing if there is a support group, or even some group therapy in your area. Often the group sessions can be affordable as it is a few people sharing the cost of the therapist's time, and sometimes just knowing that other people are going through the same sorts of things makes a huge difference.


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## Guest

PAY for support groups - chuffin' aida nothing is free in the States is it? Here in the UK - they are free as they should be if you are ill and needing help.I honestly don't think written or computer stuff is going to be much cop if you are depressed and mentally ill.Sue


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## Kathleen M.

Usually support groups with no professional involvement tend to be free, although depending on where they meet there may be a fee to cover the cost of renting the space out.Some churches and some other places will donate out the space, but it does cost something to provide heat and lights and bathrooms and all that.Group therapy has a professional run it and while there may be some that are free (or some at sliding scale based on ability to pay) most trained professionals can't give away that much time and afford to feed themselves and pay for their office and all that.Would be nice if everything could be free, but someone is paying for it. Even if it is free to the user taxes or donations pay for things like rent and utilities. Healthcare in the UK isn't free. If the government pays they have to find a way to raise that money through taxes, etc. I know the University here has group therapy for as low as $10 or so a session for the ones where students about to graduate do some of the therapy. There are ways to get things cheap, but that doesn't mean the cheap/free ones are the best fit for someone.


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## Guest

Kathleen - I LIVE in the UK - yes it is - yes I know all about paying through taxes - my husband will become a 50% taxpayer but I still maintain the ethos of the National Health is a sound one and most of the staff who work for it, second to none. At the end of the day, broadly speaking, still, folk who need access to splendid health care and who don't have the means to pay have access to its services.When I was ill with crippling depression - my care both within the psychiatric unit and afterwards was, to all intents and purposes free.Support groups here are free - leastways they certainly were when I needed them.Sue


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## Kathleen M.

There are some that are supported by taxes or by donations from churches and stuff, but someone has to pay the rent and the utilities. We do not have socialized medicine here so expecting one small part of the whole thing would always be covered by taxes paid to the government isn't going to happen.Having a professional run something means they either donate their time or they have to be paid by someone. Usually those are not called support groups here. They are called group therapy. Usually I find them in the $10-$50 an hour range (often covered by insurance, where an individuals session is like $100 or more an hour). Support groups just have to figure out how to cover the space they use as everyone is a sufferer, not a professional. Depending on where they meet there may or may not be a small fee, and sometimes that depends on if they supply coffee and tea or not. I'm sorry if they are only acceptable if there is no direct cost to the user in your eyes. There are low cost/no cost services available in most communities in the US for those that do not have insurance or are of low income. We aren't just throwing everyone who makes less the $100K to the wolves with no possibility of medical care. I think the important point is that they can be effective for some people and may be easier to get than one-on-one care. Doesn't really matter to me if they are completely paid for by the government, insurance or I have to throw in a couple of bucks myself to cover the coffee and the rent on the space.I'm done arguing politics with you when the important point is something else, not whether or not the US is evolved enough to have nationalized health care. After all isn't the OP in the UK so all your outrage over $10 a week (a common cost here even if some may be a bit more) doesn't even apply. *sigh*


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## cherrypie09

I have looked on the web and i cant see any support groups listed in gloucester , England.for anxiety and depression, If anyone knows different id be glad to know.


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## Cherrie

Hi CherrypieSorry for jumping in a little out of context to the origin of your depression -- I'm assuming that your depression is related to your IBS?I am sorry that you haven't found any support groups online and that the in-person CBT sessions are too infrequent and/or won't happen until much later. That's so tough. Would it be possible to ask your GP or therapist whether they know of any support groups as a complementary effort to your therapy sessions? They may have some info/connections that's not posted online. Also, while I do understand that people have different severities of depression, I have found it of good supplimentary value even from CBT that's presented in written form as self-help info. In fact, a couple years ago I read Dr. Bolen's CBT stuff about forming a new way of thinking about the gut, and I felt better esp. emotionally even just after reading and agreeing with what she said. And with her ways of thinking to break the bond of IBS together with meds and breathing exercises and careful prep, I even got through a long international flight. So, as frustrating as how scant professional help is, it may still be beneficial to try the online CBT and stick with it for a little while to see if it could be helpful.Sending you good thoughts...P.S. -- Dr. Bolen's book is entitled: _Breaking the Bond of IBS_ (by Barbara Bradley Bolen)there's also a chapter on CBT in this book: _IBS Chat: Real Life Stories and Solutions_ (by Jeffrey Robers and Barbara Bradley Bolen)


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## Guest

Please don't post "sigh" - what is that supposed to mean Kathleen?I am not arguing with you - but I'm a Brit so I do know how our health service is funded thats all.Sue


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## Cherrie

P.P.S. -- Cherrypie, I also find it helpful to try to remember and apply the helpful ways of thinking in the CBT exercises when real life situation arises. For example, the other day, I had to leave home before 7:00 a.m. and it was so hard for me to do so because of my IBS. So I tried to remember the helpful ways of thinking and said to myself, "I can get up earlier to use the restroom. And if get up early enough, I will have enough time. And the colon is most active from 5 to 7 and I don't need to go after 7" and "simply because I had a few close calls, it doesn't mean this time it will happen to me"... So, I said this to myself a few times out loud and then also asked my husband to say it with me. And so, it took away a lot of the anxiety, not all, but a lot of. Although we eventually left at 7:30, it was still a lot better than taking up my whole morning. I mean, I understand that this is sooooo soooo hard at the beginning, but with practice it can be of some (if not a lot of) help







. Do keep in touch and keep us updated.


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## Kathleen M.

I am not discussing any more politics with you on a thread that should be about helping someone.Sorry I dared to express my frustration. I will never sigh again at you, I may never directly respond to you again because I can't do it in a way that seems to work.Back to the topic.I didn't find anything on a quick google search. You might ask the mental health person you talk to if they know where the best place to find out about that is in your area.


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## Guest

Good thank you I don't like being sighed at - I'm sure you don't either. If you read back through the thread - you'll see, I hope - that I've been busy supporting Cherrypie - I feel desperate cos its very close to home all of this.Cherrypie - I do hope you can find somebody in the medical profession who does more than ask inane questions.Sue


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## CatUK

Hiya Cherrypie, just wanted to check in and see how you're doing? Feel free to pm or email me anytime, am on the internet everyday.Feeling a bit anxious myself as Mum and sister are off the Barcelona tomorrow and I'm alone completely for 3 days so am stressing out big time as I have no one to talk to when anxiety hits. Also worrying something is going to happen to them on the way to the airport or while they are in Barcelona, stupid I know but that's the way my head works at the moment.Again you know where I am cherry


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## Guest

Oh Barcelona's wonderful Cat - we've just come back - why didn't you go with them?Sue


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## CatUK

Fear of flying and with my anxiety I can't be away from home overnight (plus we have cats and have no one to feed them for 3 days).I won a competition to spend 2 nights in Staffordshire in a 4 star hotel at the end of August but not sure if I can do that either. Already stressing out about the Take That concert in June (as the trams are off so worrying about how to get to Old Trafford). My brain never stops worrying.Sister has been to Barcelona before and has decided to treat Mum to a break as she's 51 and never been on holiday. I'm not letting on how bad I'm feeling as don't want to ruin their holiday with them worrying about me


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## Guest

Oh dear lord Cat - you are TWENTY NINE - you can't live like this for heaven's sake. I might see you at Take That - we're going - you mean the gig at Old Trafford.Is this w/e just for you or could you take a friend? If its in a hotel - you'll have your own room and presumably an en-suite - you'd have a blast. Make that something to aim for.Sue


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## CatUK

I know, 29 and living with anxiety is no fun. The weekend away is for 2 people (supposed to be going with my sister), hopefully I'll be able to do it but I've a feeling she'll be going with a friend at this rate. Yes Take That is the one at Old Trafford, I'm going on the 24th June and am really pleased because I've just seen The Script are the support act who I love so it's made me even more determined to get there. I'm fine when at the concert, just the train journey that bothers me.


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## Guest

Well I know - its HELL but it seems and forgive my bluntness - that anxiety is absolutely governing your life and it can't be allowed to do that. Why on earth can't you go for a nice w/e at a hotel with a toilet to hand with your sister, who you are presumably comfortable with. I think you are allowing obstacles to get in your way without even giving yourself a chance. Once you get out there and give things a bash - positive experiences will build on positive experiences - the reverse is also true. You could become a prisoner in your own home and surely to god you don't want that to happen? At the end of the day, try to be rational - whats the worst that could happen - you soil yourself or something - take precautions with you - plenty of folk do that - you talk to Baz.What is happening with your meds - I know you have come off anti-depressants - but what are you taking now and is it working at all?I'm sorry - I know I come over as bossy - but you know I have been where you are now - and only YOU can take control of this situation. I look at my life now - I'll be FIFTY in just over 3 years - its over in a blink of an eye - this cannot be the best that you can be - can it.Sue


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## cherrypie09

Hi. CatI am still suffering with the anxiety, i have been trying to manage the IBS-D with immodium, just when i think i have the dose right, i get a bad stomach today, only just made the loo, I hate this IBS-D, if only i could manage it better the anxiety would not be so bad. I am seeing the mental health nurse tomorrow and going to take my papers for the CBT on the computor that i am doing, i am so confused by it, and its not helping, i dont understand some of it, this is all useless, (i think i am useless, i hate my life).How are you doing, are you still taking the herbal tablets, You are brave if you go to the concert, or do you not have IBS-D, i cant remember.


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## Guest

No, you aren't useless but you need to take back control of your life and you obviously are not getting the proper support to do that. I think you need to go back to your family doctor and cut to the chase - you have been pushed from pillar to post - from one useless professional (and I use the word advisedly) to another. You have to be robust and say "look this is no good, I have no quality of life, I have tried to manage this condition by myself but I'm getting NOWHERE, over to you".Mental health issues are awful - and god do I know how bloody awful - but you can't be swept along in a stream like this - you need to take control of your condition and keep pegging away until you get the help you need.I've said this to Cat - you only get one stab at this - get some help now.Sue


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## cherrypie09

Hi.I will try and get the mental health nurse to help more with the CBT im doing on line, ive an appointment tomorrow morning and i have a appointment with my gp tomorrow evening. When i saw the mental health doctor on thursday, she said i had made an improvement since starting the mirtazapine, and as i was on 30mg didnt want to put it up any more, i told her i feel like i have come to a stand still, all she said was persevere with the cbt. I am not very assertive though, i know i must stand up for myself, i will try tomorrow.


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## Guest

Cherry luv - I wasn't - not until I came out the other side of my "breakdown" (for want of a better word). Now I see, you really only have one shot (though I strongly believe I've been given 2 - since I very nearly ended it all in 2006) and if you don't fight your corner - who the boggin' hell will.I think you should express your frustrations whilst acknowledging that nursing yourself back to good mental health is abit 1 step forward, 2 steps back. Only you really know whether you are making progress but I also think its fair to say the only way to make progress is to take yourself out of your comfort zone (ghastly hackneyed phrase but an apt one). Its safer just to stay and home and be unhappy, of course it is - but try and push yourself abit a day at a time. I do appreciate that with you, you are also battling with horrible delicate insides and that has to be addressed to.I'm certainly NOT the best person to advise you on this but there is alot of hard work ahead of you, I won't deny.Maybe it would help to almost make a chart - setting initially very modest goals about what you want to achieve - that might only be to get out to the supermarket and do a week's shop - I dunno - I don't really know what you are up to - but you have to start putting some structure back into your life - as much as you can. You might surprise yourself what you can actually achieve and its good to reflect on this when you have the inevitably grotty day.Dunno - just throwing out some suggestions.Sue


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## cherrypie09

Hi. SueThanks for all your advice and listening to me.Saw the mental health nurse today, showed her my cbt papers, she said i was doing fine, and that from the papers and charts I had done shows a improvement, and that i was tackling things like, going shopping on my own, driving to appointments on my own and the usual daily housework tasks, if I look back at the daily/weekly progress sheets she said there is an approvement since february. Why do I think that i have come to a standstill then. she said i was trying to find complicated answers and ways of doing my tasks, and being too hard on my self. . I still cant have a one on one sessions as the wait is months, but if i want to pay and go to a councellor and do it i could with someone like listening post., (i cant, though, no job, no money) NHS has to be done in order, no pushing up ahead she said, The computor CBT, then the Book cbt with 1 15 minuet phone call a week, then one on one cbt if needed. I also asked if there were any support groups in Gloucester to go and meet up with others, but she said there arnt any. Got the doctor at 5pm, taking husband with me for backup.


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## Kathleen M.

Well people, in general, are often not very good at sensing their progress over time. That is why the recording thing helps, especially if someone else can look over it.I've noticed on a lot of things there usually is a stage where I feel stalled out even when there is some progress being made. Progress also comes at different rates at different stages of anything so sometimes it is so slow we don't really notice it even if at other times we can really see things moving quickly.It is a process and there isn't a right speed for recovery so try not to be so hard on yourself.


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## cherrypie09

Thanks il try.Just had a letter asking me to go for a medical infront of a board to do with employment and work and pensions, as i am on long term sick, they want to see why i am not able to work, how they are going to tell i have very bad IBS-D and are suffering from anxiety and depression, i dont know, its not something that can be aparrent by examining you.?


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## CatUK

Cherry I too had to go for a medical for the DWP. I didn't have to go infront of a board though which is weird. I just had to have a one to one chat with someone and tell them how my day is and what I can do. They don't examine you (well I've had 3 medicals for the DWP and have never been examined). I've got another coming up in August.


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## cherrypie09

Hi CatYes it is infront of one person, the board was a figure of speech. How long have you been off work,3 medicals and another coming up, why do you have to see them so often, if you are ill and cant work that should be good enough. do they ask you lots of questions, never had one before.


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## Guest

Well speaking from "the other side" so to speak - I think its fair enough that you are questioned as to your inability to work - I have every sympathy for people who, for whatever reason cannot - but there are still people who dodge the system and there has to be some sort of policing mechanism in place, particularly in these times of economic depression. From my experience (and I work for the CAB), its more a question of what things you are able to do or not. Sue


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## CatUK

I was diagnosed with anxiety over 2 years ago and wouldn't claim benefits despite my Mum telling me I was entitled to them. In the end my Dr and counsellor kept telling me to get onto them because I was living on nothing and I could my prescriptions free if I was on them so I go on them about 18 months ago. I had my 1st medical Dec 2007 and then my next January this year. I have my next one in August this year.The medical lasts about 30 minutes usually. They ask you loads of questions to see if you can function normally day to day. They could tell with my answers I couldn't. They asked if I could go shopping, go out everyday (I usually manage once a week), have any friends, socialise etc. All of my answers were no so they realised how bad I was. Can't even visit my family who I haven't seen in over 15 years (my Mum and sister go and visit them but I just can't do it). They do ask a lot of questions and want you to tell them everything you do each day to see if you can live a normal life. I think it's great they do these interviews as there are so many people conning the system and just living on benefits (how you survive on what I get and live a normal life I don't know, I only manage as I barely go out to spend it).You'll be fine cherrypie, just go in and tell them how you are and if you're anxious in there let it show. I couldn't stop fiddling my hands and was speaking quite quiet and the man could tell I was really nervous talking to him.


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## Guest

Cat - would you not then consider a period of hospitalisation to try and sort this out once and for all? I had 6 not very nice weeks in a psychiatric unit - it was tough and hard but you had nurses and doctors there all the time, sorting out your medication and getting you back on your feet. I started to feel well in there after about a month and am now able to work part-time and live a "normal" life whatever that is. Your quality of life is clearly almost non-existent - would you consider something like that - mind you, I've no idea what resources are like in your neck of the woods. Is that an idea worth exploring?Sue


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## Guest

Do you know - on the other hand - what the bloody hell do I know anyway. Life is a total and utter s**t so perhaps staying at home and doing nothing is the solution.


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## CatUK

I wouldn't want to stay in hospital to get treated, I daren't even go to the hospital to have a scan as I have a fear of hospital from when I used to visit my Gran in them everyday when she was in there with altzhiemers (sp?). I'm hoping my CBT will help as I have heard it can really help some people. I think if I could get my fear of vomiting under control I would be a lot better, that is what is causing a lot of my anxiety at the moment. I feel anxious so I feel sick which then makes me feel even worse. The thing is there is no treatment for phobias even though it is ruling my life.I think I have improved a lot in the last year. I can now go for a drink on a coffee shop, can go shopping (not food shopping, only done that twice in the last year) in town for 2 hours with my Mum or sister. I think one of the reasons I don't go out more often is if I go out for 2 hours then I am completely wiped out for the next few days and just want to sleep and everything aches. Also it takes me 2 hours to get ready to go out as I won't leave the house without my hair clean, full make up on etc. That's down to the low self esteem though.I will get there though, it's just going to take time. I AM going to the concert in June no matter what, I have a train journey and a tram journey but I can do it, I love Take That (and The Script who are supporting them) and there is no way I am going to miss them. Last concert I sold my tickets as I thought I couldn't face it but then I won some in a competition so I saw that as fate that I was ment to go which I did and had a fab time.


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## cherrypie09

Hi Cat.I am so worried about the medical, there is no parking at the place i have to go to and the nearest is a 15 mins walk away, with me being so nervous about it my IBS-D is sure to play up, im worried i wont make it to the loo in time, I asked at the place im going to and they said they have no public toilets, but if i asked i could use a staff one, but when i get the need to go, i have to go straight there and not be bothered with if there is someone who can let me into a staff toilet. I am getting so uptight and worried already and my appointment is not until the 18th May.You are like me Cat, only yours is from the fear of being sick, mine is the fear of messing myself.


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## Guest

OK Cherry - so go and familiarise yourself with the setting, take your husband if necessary - check where you can park or the nearest bus-stop is or whatever. Go and practice - we did that when our son was due before the magistrates and I was very uptight. If you know the lay-out - it won't seem nearly as bad. In the meantime - keep yourself as busy as you can between now and then and don't brood about it. You know you can use the toilet - so whats the problem?Sue


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## MollyB

Good advice, SueV.


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## Guest

Thanks Molly - Cherrypie and Cat both know I've been exactly where they are now bless them. Mental "wrinkles" are horrible and its a long, agonising and slow process but I'm t'other side know so to speak - though I'd never take my mental health for granted.Let us know how you go on Cherry.Sue xxx


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## cherrypie09

Hi sue and all I am pleased to say I have had a good weekend so far, I have been in the Garden cutting back and brushing leaves and planted 6 tubs with plants. I also went with my husband to Argos today 20mins each way in car and not a toilet in site (am dosed up with immodium). Hope these two days are not one offs, and that i am actually starting to feel a bit better with the anxiety. This will only last though as long as the IBS-D doesnt get too bad, at the moment its not too bad, i am taking the Calcium and immodium. Ive two more appointments to get through yet, a medical, and a muscle control test in my bottom, so i will be very uptight and in a bad way nearer the time. ( i know Sue, i must not think like that, but i get so worked up over everything).


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## CatUK

That's great that you've had a good weekend Cherry, hope it continues and you get to go out more and more


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## Guest

Cherry - like me - you've got to turn your thinking around from "what if what if" to "lets give this a bash, whats the worst than can happen". Its bloody brill that you've done all that (don't you think gardening is right therapeutic???) - so BUILD ON THAT.Do what I suggest - GO AND VISIT THE PLACE WHERE YOU HAVE TO HAVE AN APPT. I've got a cervical smear on Tuesday if that makes you feel any better and I'm in a bit of a two and eight about that (its only routine - nowt sinister). Keep busy thats the key.But well done - give yourself a pat on the back!!!! Shove some pix on here of the garden will you - I'd love to see, since I'm developing a middle-age fascination with my garden.Sue


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## MollyB

Glad to know you've had a good couple of days. That in itself helps some of the IBS symptoms because we start to relax a bit. Please let me know how your tests go. Mine are scheduled for the 28th.Molly


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## MollyB

Cat, sounds like you might have agoraphobia - fear of going out in public. I've suffered with that, too, and was able to overcome it with the help of a wonderful therapist. You're right, it takes baby steps to get yourself to a "good place". I finally realized with the therapist's help that I was trying to control my illness, and I had to let go of that to allow someone to help me. Yes, it's scary as hell, but a funny thing happened.....I started getting better. No, it wasn't overnight, but I finally felt safe. Geez Louise, what a feeling!!! I understand that you don't want to go to the hospital for help, but "hospital" is just a word. These places are recovery units, and people who work there are caring and supportive of our struggle to find happiness. Think about taking a baby step to recovery, Cat. Molly


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## Guest

I think its really difficult Molly - in a way, the choice was made for me cos I was so ill (I attempted suicide on 13/03/06) - it was hell - and I won't bore you with the details - but I remember one horrible night - when, as usual, I'd had NO sleep at all - a nurse said to me "Sue, these places used to be called asylums - and thats what they are asylums from the world" - once you see them in that sort of light - it sort of made sense and made my stay in there alot more bearable. I'm sure you are right - but its getting people to see that perhaps just for a little while, thats the best place if you really want a chance at proper recovery for good.Sue


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## MollyB

You're right, Sue. It is so very difficult. I also found the book, "Feeling Good" by David Burns (not the self esteem workbook but the book) helped my recovery. It's available through Amazon.com. I still go back and reread it when I'm feeling frustrated or panicky with the way things are going in my life. It helps me to rethink those anxious thoughts and get to a better place emotionally and mentally.


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## cherrypie09

mollywhat tests are you having done. ?


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## MollyB

Cherrypie, I'm having manomatry, flexible sig, and endoscopy. Hate the thought of endoscopy because of sedation. I always get sick from the drugs. UGH!


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## Guest

You've hit the nail on the head Molly - its just having SOMETHING isn't it to hang onto - I did abit of meditation when I was in the loony bin - and if I have a black dog day (mercifully very rarely) - I can use that. Different things work for different people.Sue


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## cherrypie09

Hi MollyYou poor thing all on the same day. My anal mametry is on the 27th of this month, I have had the others done before.Good Luck, They dont put you out, Just make you relaxed.


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## MollyB

Sounds like we are sisters of the soul, Sue.


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## MollyB

Yep, all the same day, and I can't wait to get it over with. I'll be thinking of you on the 27th.


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## Guest

Well I'm delighted you are here Molly. You don't support Liverpool Football Club and like The Smiths do you???Sue xxx


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## MollyB

I don't quite understand what you mean, Sue, so I guess my answer is no. But thanks for the welcome. Feels good to discuss poop and anxiety/depression issues with people who don't get embarrassed about the topic.


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## Guest

Eh?Sue


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## MollyB

I was replying to your question about Liverpool Football Club. Don't know what that is.


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## Guest

Really - how awful - its a football club - the wonderful Reds - riding high at long bloody last!!!!!Sue


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## CatUK

Molly I did have agorophobia. I didn't leave the house from the age of 16 to the age of 23. The first few years was because I had ME and spent all my time asleep but then after that I was too scared to go out then one day I got fed up of being stuck in, did my make up got dressed and went to the local corner shops. I was fine after that for around 3 years then out of nowhere, nothing at all happened anxiety struck. I just don't get why it got me when I was living life and getting back to "normal". The only thing I can think of is I got a bug and was sick which triggered my fear of being sick (took me back to when I was 12 and I had a stomach bug and was sick about 15 times in 5 hours, last time I was sick until in my 20's). Since then I've felt sick everyday and am scared of leaving the house incase I'm sick. Even though I know it's highly unlikely I still can't get the idea out of my head. The thing is I don't see how I can over this as Dr's don't treat phobias.


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## Guest

You seem to have reached a dead-end don't you Cat - I can't remember if you'd been put on a waiting list for CBT - if you could get over this fear of being sick - you'd be a long-way down the road to recovery. Is that all thats stopping you getting out and finding work? Good luck - it is a post-code lottery for what treatments are available isn't it.Sue


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## CatUK

Hiya Sue, yes I'm on a waiting list for CBT which I should get an appointment for in August (5 months waiting list according to the letter I had).Another thing stopping me from doing anything is the fact I feel exhausted all the time. I never feel refreshed after sleep, my joints ache, after going out anyway I know I'm going to suffer for it as a days shopping in town makes me want to sleep for 2 days afterwards, it just completely wipes me out doing anything. Mum wants me to go to the Dr's as it's not normal to be so tired all the time but I'm scared of going incase they tell me my ME is back. I'm scared of being told that as it means yet another hold on life when I'm trying to get on with it. Just been asleep again now and I feel awful now I've woken up. I slept 8 hours last night as well but still don't feel like I've had any sleep. It's just no annoying that I feel so rough.How are you today Cherry? Hope the good feelings are continuing and the IBS is still under more control. Feel free to email me anytime.


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## Guest

Oh Cat - you are like me - in a tizz about what if X, what if Y - I'm in a helluva state cos I've got a cervical smear tomorrow - its only routine. Still, as you say its not normal for a young girl of 29 to feel that wiped out and surely to god it'd be better to know whats going on - feeling this exhausted just isn't normal and if its something that can be addressed - surely it'd be better to sort out whats going on?I think its also true that the less you do, the less you feel like doing - and the converse is also true as well. I now work 2 1/2 days a week, volunteer 1 day, dog walk and rush about after 3 kids - when I look back to the state I was in in 2006 where I could barely face the week's grocery shopping.... I know how badly you want to get well, but if you don't sort out whats going on physically - how can you ever?Sue xxx


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## CatUK

I know you're right Sue, I just remember how ill I was in my teens and am scared of going there again as there is no cure for ME, just treatment to help the symptoms and rest. I know I have to call the Dr's and go, just know I'll have to go through loads of tests again so they can rule out everything else. Hopefully it will all just be down to my anxiety, can't believe I'm wishing anxiety lol. At least with that there is a treatment though so I'd take that over ME anyday.You'll be fine at your smear tomorrow Sue, any sort of tests, exams etc stress me out too so I know how you feel. Big hugs for tomorrow and I promise to call the Dr's and get an appointment to talk about how rough I feel. Just need a good kick up the bum to do it lol.


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## Guest

Well you're not alone chuckles - I remember being terrified about wearing specs - I was virtually blind and still refused to go - I remember going to the optician and "revising" the eye chart when he was out of the room - oh god only me. I refused to wear them ever - tragic - I went through the whole of boarding school in a blur and didn't realise til I was about 17 (and got contact lenses) that trees had leaves - I thought they were just lollipops!!!!You have got to brace yourself - cos this ain't going to go away - I know depression can make you terribly lethargic and you're getting no stimulation really are you - being cooped up all the time.You can do it luv - come on.Sue xxx


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## CatUK

Well I've just booked to make an appointment with my Dr and there are no appointments until June. Can't believe I have to wait that long. Will drive myself crazy with worry for almost a month now. Apparantly she's really popular and booked up for ages in advance, not pleased about waiting that long as I'm wanting to get in before the Take That concert and check I'm ok to go for it (will be out of the house around 6 or 7 hours).Hope you went ok at your appointment today Sue and it wasn't as you were thinking. Cherry how are you doing? Hope you are doing well and the IBS is keeping itself under control.


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## cherrypie09

Oh CatThats a long time to wait for a appointment, isnt there another doctor at the practice you can see, or are you like me , prefer to see just the one. I wont say dont worry, because you probably will, i would, i worry about everything. My IBS-D is up and down, my anxiety is just managable at the moment, the doctor gave me some Diazapam to go with my Mirtazapine. Did you think any more about Beating the Blues on the computor, as your CBT wait is so long, I am on session 7 now, only 1 more to go.Sue.Hope all went well today for you, you probably wont have the results yet, but hope everything was fine for you.Take care both.


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## CatUK

Hiya cherry, I have thought about doing Beating The Blues on the computer but as I'm finding it virtually impossible to get an appointment I can't ask about it. I do prefer to see the same Dr as I've already had 3 different ones in the last year, my regular one is off on maternity leave, my replacement one was only there for part of her training, I didn't know that when I saw her and my 3rd one is very popular and is booked up weeks in advance. Just want to see someone who knows my history a bit so they know how to treat me better. Mum is going to the Dr on to see if she can get me a cancellation appointment otherwise I'll be waiting till the 2nd week of June. Glad your anxiety is just about manageable at the moment, hope it stays that way or gets better. Have the psyllium husks come yet? Really hope they work, should really make a difference for you.


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## cherrypie09

Hi CatHope your mum can get a cancellation, its bad to have to wait that long. I think i spoke to soon about feeling better, My IBS-D is playing up bad today, so i am so uptight and anxious, i have just had to take a diazapam to help calm me down. well i did have 4 days that were not too bad, today is going to be bad.God i hate this, anxiety and IBS-D, it all rules your life so bad, wish i could get it under control. Still waiting for the physslium husks to come, does it tell you on the bottle how many to take and how often.Carol


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## CatUK

Hiya Carol, sorry your IBS is playing up. Have you thought of keeping a food diary and se if anything maybe triggers it or makes it worse? I did that when mine was playing up and found that too much milk and fatty foods set mine off (and chocolate). Yes the physilloum husks have directions on the bottle. Tells you how many to take and also to take with a glass of water (helps them work).Hope you feel better soon


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## cherrypie09

Hi CatTried the food diary, i cant seem to pin point anything in particular, i dont have dairy, and dont eat much fat, my food consists of, lean chicken, potates, carrots, plain fish, rice, and a few other things which are lactose free, like soya desserts and lacto free and gluten free biscuits., I have not got celiacs, as was tested for it, but alot of the products you buy are lacto free and gluten free, ie. the bread and biscuits. It doesnt matter what i eat, i can feel the food rushing through my intestines, it seems to move through the intestines very quickly, i dont know why it does that, i assume most people with IBS-D has that happen.


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## CatUK

Seems to eat a really good diet Carol so can't imagine it being that, that is effecting your IBS. The psyllium husks definately should work to bulk you up and make it much better to go to the loo. Hope they arrive soon and that they give you some relief.


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## cherrypie09

Hi. CatSo do I, did yours take a long time to come, has your mum had any luck with the doctor.PSJust started my dinner and the post man has just brought the physllium caps, cant take them yet, it says to take them 30-60 mins before food, take 2 capsules 3 times a day, i might just take 1 capsule 3 times a day to start with.Carol


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## CatUK

That's great that they've come. Yes start at one capsule before each meal then if you are feeling ok on that after a couple of days move it upto the full dose (I did this as I had heard they could cause gas but I had no problems). Give them a week and see if they work (need time to work there way into the bowel). Really praying they work for you Carol as I know how horrible it is when your IBS is playing up.My tummy hurts at the moment low down on the right, sort of a nagging pain and burning. Only started since I just did some exercises (started doing them as I started a diet on Monday). Going to mention the tummy pains as well when I finally get to the Dr's, wonder why exercising is triggering it and what it is (there goes the ovarian cyst worry in me head again).


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## cherrypie09

Hi CatTry not too worry, i know its easier said than done. I get pain in the left side, associated with the colon. Perhaps you have been exercising too hard and pulled a muscles.Imust remember to take the physillium 1 hour before my tea with a large glass of water. I hope i dont end up being constipated. Keep in touch.Carol


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## CatUK

You won't end up constipated Carol. I was taking it for constipation to get everything moving and I definately went more while taking them than when I didn't take them.


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## cherrypie09

Hi CatI dont want to go more, i just want to go less often and more formed bms and NOT diarrhoea and urgency..


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## CatUK

Don't worry Carol you won't go more. I only went more because I was constipated, they work different for IBS-C and IBS-D. With IBS-D all they do is bulk up your stools to make them more normal. With IBS-C they help stop you being so bunged up by giving the bowel more normal movements than waiting days to go.


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## cherrypie09

Hi CatHow are you, hows the pain in your side,Whats the news with a doctors appointment, did your mum manage to get a closer appointment.I am taking 1 physslium husk capsule before each meal (3 a day at the moment) and 1/2 a calcium tablet after every meal, also still taking 1 immodium, I am having 1 good bm every day, so far this combo seems to be working. But ive a feeling the weekend and monday will be bad as i will be so uptight and panicky, my anxiety will be high, and its sure to set the IBS-D off again, i have the medical on monday.


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## Guest

C'mon girls - I survived my smear - not a picnic but OK - you'll be OK - keep busy over the w/e Cherry then you won't have time to brood.Sue xxx


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## cherrypie09

Hi SueI will try, feeling a bit jittery though, may have to take a couple of diazapam on monday morning.. I have had a fairly good week, since the good weekend last week, Hope I am on the up.


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## CatUK

Glad everything went ok with your smear Sue.Don't worry cherry, Monday will be over and done with soon and you'll wonder what all the fuss was about (I am like that everytime).Still in pain all over my stomach, feel really sick all the time and keep getting stabbing pains low down on the right. Also feel like my whole digestive system is full of gas (so much popping and pain). God knows how I am supposed to not worry until my Dr's appointment in June. Convinced myself it's something serious but I always do that (my anxiety telling me it's the worse thing possible).


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## cherrypie09

Oh dear CatSorry you are feeling so bad. try and calm down, like you are telling me to. i am very windy , probably the physillium husks capsules.You dont think you may have appendix problems, or is it the ibs and sickness problem playing up and you are magnifying the symptoms due to the anxiety.Go and do something nice, give yourself a facial and manicure, do your nails and toenails with polish.Take care.Keep in touch


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## CatUK

Hiya cherry, don't think it's my appendix as I've had the symptoms on and off since last summer but this is the longest the symptoms have been continuous and the most pain and nausea I have had. My anxiety will definately be making it worse than it is which is why I wanted a Dr's appointment for this week and with a Dr I know (helps seeing someone I know because they know my history). Just want to see someone soon so I can put my mind at rest as I'm imagining all sorts plus I have the Take That concert in just over a month and if I'm feeling like I am now there is no way I will be able to go, arrggghhh it's so annoying.Anyway I'm sorry for moaning, go and have a nice weekend, I will try and do the same. Will be watching Eurovision tonight (in between Britains Got Talent) so hopefully I'll be able to take my mind off of it for a while.


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## Guest

Oh me too Cat - can't WAIT - Clare and I will be GLUED.Try not to worry - is it in the splenic flexure - sort of under the rib-cage - if I ever get symptoms of IBS its there and it can make you feel right sickly??? Don't for god's sake go googling or you'll scare yourself to death.Are you on your own at the mo - get a friend around to watch it - much more fun that way.Sue xxx


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## MollyB

Hi girls.....I'm feeling a bit down today. Hope ya'll are having a good day.Molly


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## Guest

Oh dear Molly - why - its Saturday????? Yeah we're all grand here - knee deep in revision - 2 of our 3 kids are sitting public exams - so all abit stressed.Hope you feel better soon.Sue xxx


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## MollyB

Hi Cat, I didn't see your post of 5-11 until today, so my apologies for not responding. Cat, can you try getting out of the house a little at a time........baby steps......only what you feel comfortable with. Try some deep breathing first and a mantra of "I am stronger than this fear. Fear can only hurt me." Then try just opening the door and walking out to the porch. Leave the door open, so if you get sick you can go inside again. Try this for a few days straight. You don't have to do any more than that. Maybe you're first step could even be just opening the door and looking outside for a few minutes.


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## MollyB

Hi Sue......yep, seems unfair to be blue on a Saturday. Think I'll try to go to a movie later to see if that helps.


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## Guest

Oh I LOVE the way you chaps speak "take in a movie" - over here we only "take in" trousers (I wish)!!!! Sorry - what did you go and see - is there owt good on???? Paul and I keep meaning to go to the flicks but summat else always seems to get in the way (usually kids)!!!Sue xxx


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## MollyB

I saw Sunshine Cleaning. I didn't know anything about the movie before I went....I like Amy Adams and saw she was in a starring role and thought it would cheer me up. Let's just saw it's not a cheerer upper movie.....a bit too heavy for anyone with severe depression since it's about two sisters who clean up houses or other locations where violent crimes have occurred. Oddly enough, I did enjoy the movie, but it's not the lighthearted feelgood movie I though I was going to see. I'm having a better day today. How about you?


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## cherrypie09

Hi. MollyHow are you today, feel any better, I couldnt go and sit through a movie, i would need the loo, and be stuck behind someone and wouldnt be able to get out, then i would panic. Im not looking forward to the 27th and this mametry, are you with yours. Keep in touchHi CatHow are you today, is the pain any better, I have had pain in my left side all day, i think its down the colon, it does that when im about to have my IBS-D play up, i am so uptight and worried about tomorrow, i knew this would happen, and ive been trying to keep busy, cleaned the house from top to bottom( not literaly, we have a bungalow) took rubbish to the tip and cooked sunday lunch.Hope you feel better soon. hope you get cancellation.Keep in touchHi SueHows you and yours, busy revising for the exams ?No gardening today, pouring with rain in Gloucester.Cant wait to get to morrow over with, i will be popping the diazapam.


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## Guest

Good luck for tomorrow Cherry - but don't wish your life away - we only have one stab at it (well I suppose I had 2!!). Sue xxx


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## MollyB

Hi Cherrypie, I'm better today, thank you. I know what you mean about being panicky at a movie. That's why I always sit in an aisle seat. Started sitting in an aisle seat when I suffered with IBS-D. Just like anybody with that problem, the first thing I used to do was look around for the bathroom (loo to you!







) and then look for ways to get out quickly. All that anxiety returned when I started having C problems because I now get worried about gas. I don't want to be trapped and not able to get out fast, and I don't want to get caught in the stampede when others are trying to get away from me!







No, I'm not looking forward to my tests on the 28th. I think it will not tell the doctor anything new and will be a waste of my money.Molly


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## MollyB

Cherrypie, what happens tomorrow?


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## CatUK

Hiya Molly, sorry you were having a bad day yesterday. Hope today you are feeling much better and that you are having a good day I'm feeling worse today but for a different reason. Sat here in bed full of a cold (my 2nd one in 10 days) and feeling sick and dithery (but my temperature is up and down all the time), convinced myself I have swine flu lol. Probably explains why I've been feeling so off and anxious this week with this coming on. Been in bed most of the day watching tv (just been watching 24 and Supernatural) and sleeping. Only popped on here just to see how everyone is doing. Sue we did well in Eurovision didn't we, 5th is amazing for us at the moment. Liked out song (just not very Eurovissiony), Norways entry was rubbish.Determined to get out and about this week, planning a mid week shopping trip to Preston so hopefully that will go ok. Going in my sisters car so if I feel rough I can go back to the car.


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## cherrypie09

Hi. MollyI have a interview and medical for the work and benefits people, cause i havnt worked since the begining of february, cause of the IBS-D and the nervous breakdown i had. Glad you are feeling better.CatSorry you have a bad cold, it can really knock you out, especially if you feeling bad anyway. It will do you good if you can get out to preston, try hard to go.SueThanks, I dont want to wish my life away, been there too, but i will be glad when this medical and interview is out of the way.


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## Guest

Look as long as you stick to the facts - don't be "British" - tell 'em how it is, how the IBS and depression impacts on your day to day life - you should be grand.Sue


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## MollyB

Sue's right, just tell it like it is. I'll say a special prayer for you.Cat, sorry to hear you've got a cold. Hope you're feeling better tomorrow and don't kiss any pigs. We don't want it to turn into swine flu!







Sue, hope you're having a good day, too.I'm headed to work. I go in on Sundays to get a few hours in for the week ahead because I have trouble getting to work on time due to being in the bathroom most of the morning. I seriously need a break from the bowel problems......somedays it feels like God doesn't like me anymore. Then, I just have to get over those feelings. I can't let this disease win.


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## CatUK

Just wanted to pop on here and wish Carol good luck for the interview today, don't panic, just take a few deep breaths and tell them how bad you feel. Let me know how it goes.I am off to Preston tomorrow afternoon, fingers crossed my anxiety doesn't play up while I'm out. My make up is going to look great with my bright red nose lol.Molly have you tried psyllium husk capsules? They are fab for bulking up your bowels and making you go more normal. I took them when my bowel was playing up bigtime and they really helped. I had normal bowel movements and went to the loo once everyday while taking them. I always have them on standby for if my bowel plays up now.


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## cherrypie09

Hi CatHave been to my medical interview, my appointment was 11.10am they were 1 hour late, then i was there for 45 mins, it was ok, but my IBS-D played up real bad before i went, 3 times, ended up taking 3 immodium. Now i have to hope they accept that i cant work at the moment. Hope you feel ok, Good luck for preston, enjoy it.


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## CatUK

Hiya Carol, glad you got through it, so sorry your IBS was playing up. It will have been all the nerves. My appointment was almost an hour late last time when I went and my IBS was playing up too (my tummy never shut up the whole time). I'm sure you'll be fine. It took me less than 2 weeks to get a reply about if I was fit for work etc. I have another medical coming up in August, same time my first CBT session will be due so think I'll have a stressful month then.Stressing about Preston already lol. Just because I've not been so far away from home since the last Take That concert I went to Xmas 2007. Making myself do it though as I have another Take That concert in a month so need to get used to being away from home, guess I just like to feel in a safe distance of home incase I panic and make a fool of myself or something.


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## cherrypie09

Hi CatYou will be ok, just enjoy your day and dont panic, think of take that. I know what you mean about safety of the home, I feel safe when i am at home its like a little secure nest, where nothing can hurt you, i know that sounds silly.Take careLet me know how preston goes.Carol.


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## MollyB

Hi Cat.....no, I've not tried psylium husk capsules. Is there a brand name? I've used Citrucel powder; is that the same thing? Does the psylium cause gas?


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## MollyB

Hi, just wanted to check in to see how cherrypie's appointment went. I just hate you have to wait for a decision, but at least the interview is over.


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## CatUK

Hiya Molly, psyllium husks are just called that and are available at health stores all over the place (and on the net). I swear by them for when you have an upset stomach, within a couple of days use your bowels are much much better and your stools more solid. You can buy them in powder which you mix with water or as capsules (which are what I take). You can read about them here:http://ezinearticles.com/?Diarrhea-Treatme...m&id=532029Off to Preston in a couple of hours and actually looking forward it. Stomach churning a bit but I'm sure I'll be ok, fingers crossed.


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## MollyB

I'll give it a try, Cat. Thanks. Hope you have a great day in Preston.


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