# Holiday Cheer is a Challenge for the Chronically Ill: Tips for Coping



## M&M (Jan 20, 2002)

Timely information posted to Co-Cure:*******************************************Holiday Cheer is a Challenge for the Chronically Ill: Tips for Coping*12-21-2005_Finding the strength to be sociable_BY JOANNE KABAKFor more than three decades, JoAnn Quinn, 55, of Bellmore has lived with lupus, which is characterized by overwhelming fatigue and extreme joint pain.She doesn't let it keep her from a social life, including having a holiday with all the frills. But at every step of the way, she has to work things out to accommodate her illness. That means leaving the decorations to her husband, serving food that's cooked in advance, and being satisfied with a house that isn't always sparkling. Sometimes, it also means having a thick skin. Quinn said she's had to brush off glares of passersby at the mall who think she doesn't look sick enough to use handicapped parking. Even harder to deal with is losing friends because, one time too many, she's had to cancel plans at the last minute. "Some people take it personally," Quinn said.Those who suffer with chronic illnesses may look healthy and have periods when their symptoms barely make a dent in the day's activities. But other times, symptoms flare up without warning. Further, many people have more than one of the approximately 80 disorders identified as chronic, including arthritis, chronic fatigue, diabetes, fibromyalgia, lupus and multiple sclerosis.In addition to getting appropriate medical treatment, patients have to figure out how to function in the family, get to work and maintain a social life. And those around them have to figure out how to respond.When it comes to chronic rheumatic illnesses, specialist Dr. Alan Kaell, who practices in Port Jefferson and Smithtown, said, "I only wish I had a magic pill that's risk-free and would cure everyone." But these types of disorders do not go into complete remission with medication, although they're helped significantly."Medicine alone," Kaell said, "is necessary but not sufficient for people to live quality productive lives, whether it's recreationally, vocationally, spiritually, socially."To get more of their life back requires socializing and coping skills. "You don't give up going out with people, but you may have to give up dancing because your knees and your back can't take it," he said. As tough as it is, people with chronic illnesses have to renegotiate with themselves, and those around them, to develop more realistic expectations.Read the complete article athttp://www.immunesupport.com/library/bulle...cle.cfm?ID=6170


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