# Getting There !



## Jeffamentrulez (Sep 29, 2004)

Hi all,Well, this is hard for me to post on an internet website but I need to do it as part of my recovery. I work as a mechanic for a bus company (fairly dangerous) in the south of England and a little over two years ago I was involved in a fairly serious accident at work involving another of my work mates in which he lost one of his fingers. To cut the story short I was fitting a brake drum back onto a bus (very heavy as you can imagine) and the lifting gear I was using failed just as my work mate was removing a bit of oily rag from the said brake drum and it fell on his hand. He was rushed to hospital in an ambulance and had nearly a year off I think in the end having various operations and the like. I had been suffering from IBS-D for a good three years prior to the incident and I was really starting to make headway and getting things under control. Well after the accident I started suffering from my IBS to the point where I had 25 days off work in a 3 month period obviously looking back now it was the stress of the whole thing. I told no one at home about the accident (or at work how I was feeling) I just simply shut the whole thing away in my head. I was at this point starting to have suicidal thoughts and just really starting to shut down mentally if you know what I mean ??. It wasn't until on the way to work ( I have a 25 mile journey) one morning that I very nearly put a BMW, who was tail gating me into a wall by just planting my foot on the brake, that I decided maybe I should seek some help things were getting dangerous. That was a whole year after the incident. I finally broke down under the mental strain, I had to go through being questioned by my bosses and various insurance bods and the police even got involved, it was like I was a criminal, money was at stake for the company as my colleague was suing for damages and told my parents and brother about everything and went and got into a counselling programme. Turns out I was suffering from PTSD after the massive trauma and shock I had been through. It's been about a year now since I spilled the beans and went through counselling and I am fighting back. I really struggled with my IBS during the dark days, and could have finished it all quite easily. If it wasn't for the fact I have some simply amazing friends, two especially I really don't think I would be typing this now. I still get "flashbacks" (sounds corny I know) and really bad bouts of rage and huge depression, but I am really making headway again. My IBS is getting markedly better. I have had one day off work so far this year due to IBS, where like I say I was having 25 days off in a 3 month period. I do still live with the nausea and bloating and toilet trips pretty much 24/7 but I have managed to stop the attacks from putting me into a flat spin and shutting myself away until it's passed. I now just try and get on with it as best I can. Hope I havn't bored you I just felt the time was right to tell the world !!. One thing I have learnt is to never ever bottle things up, I did and it ruined me. Stay SafeKG


----------



## 22896 (Aug 19, 2006)

A very inspiring story. You must have an awesome support system and the will to overcome anything that comes your way. I have not been through anything close to what you have, but have had IBS for 20 years and depression/anxiety for 5 years. It is definitely not an easy way to live life and I often wonder if it is any kind of life at all. Take care and stay strong. Mindy


----------



## hope* (Aug 1, 2005)

Hi Jeff, i can totally relate to everything you posted, i had a accident two and a half years ago, and my life fell apart, i hit the bottle to block out the awful thoughts and nightmares, i developed ibs and anxiety/panic attacks, i thought i was going mad. my GP arranged for me to see a counsellor and she told me i had post traumatic stress, i cried with relief, just knowing that it wasnt me and i did have a problem. I been having CBT and it has helped so much, i finally feel like i'm getting my life together, of course the ibs is still a problem but i can deal with that







.I'm so pleased that you are feeling better, and making headway, i'm always here if you need to talk, take care.


----------



## Guest (May 25, 2007)

Jeff - absolute power to your elbow hun for facing your demons and telling us this amazing account of your depression and your uphill struggle back out of "the pit" - I had a very severe bout of depression about 15 months' ago - so I can relate to much of what you said here - and yes, like me, you're a Brit - and god aren't we just great at putting on a brave face - listen to me - I'm doing that right now - not related to depression - but a situation at home - I suppose I'm still of the mindset that you don't want to be a bore and that being strong and cheery is actually the right way forward - maybe it isn't always - so you have faced up to the fact that you weren't coping - completely understandably - by what you've been through.You aren't being a bore by telling us this - you will have helped god knows how many people on this 'ere board - I applaud you.All the very best for the future.Sue


----------



## impish (May 25, 2007)

Jeffamentrulez said:


> Hi all,Well, this is hard for me to post on an internet website but I need to do it as part of my recovery. I work as a mechanic for a bus company (fairly dangerous) in the south of England and a little over two years ago I was involved in a fairly serious accident at work involving another of my work mates in which he lost one of his fingers. To cut the story short I was fitting a brake drum back onto a bus (very heavy as you can imagine) and the lifting gear I was using failed just as my work mate was removing a bit of oily rag from the said brake drum and it fell on his hand. He was rushed to hospital in an ambulance and had nearly a year off I think in the end having various operations and the like. I had been suffering from IBS-D for a good three years prior to the incident and I was really starting to make headway and getting things under control. Well after the accident I started suffering from my IBS to the point where I had 25 days off work in a 3 month period obviously looking back now it was the stress of the whole thing. I told no one at home about the accident (or at work how I was feeling) I just simply shut the whole thing away in my head. I was at this point starting to have suicidal thoughts and just really starting to shut down mentally if you know what I mean ??. It wasn't until on the way to work ( I have a 25 mile journey) one morning that I very nearly put a BMW, who was tail gating me into a wall by just planting my foot on the brake, that I decided maybe I should seek some help things were getting dangerous. That was a whole year after the incident. I finally broke down under the mental strain, I had to go through being questioned by my bosses and various insurance bods and the police even got involved, it was like I was a criminal, money was at stake for the company as my colleague was suing for damages and told my parents and brother about everything and went and got into a counselling programme. Turns out I was suffering from PTSD after the massive trauma and shock I had been through. It's been about a year now since I spilled the beans and went through counselling and I am fighting back. I really struggled with my IBS during the dark days, and could have finished it all quite easily. If it wasn't for the fact I have some simply amazing friends, two especially I really don't think I would be typing this now. I still get "flashbacks" (sounds corny I know) and really bad bouts of rage and huge depression, but I am really making headway again. My IBS is getting markedly better. I have had one day off work so far this year due to IBS, where like I say I was having 25 days off in a 3 month period. I do still live with the nausea and bloating and toilet trips pretty much 24/7 but I have managed to stop the attacks from putting me into a flat spin and shutting myself away until it's passed. I now just try and get on with it as best I can. Hope I havn't bored you I just felt the time was right to tell the world !!. One thing I have learnt is to never ever bottle things up, I did and it ruined me. Stay SafeKG


Hello, Jeff welcome to the site,which as has already been said is a good site and a site with a wealth of information,some of which works for some of us ,and not for others,but it is also a case of trial and error as we all know .Please don`t feel you have bored us in here,the site is here to be of help to all of us who use it ,and for each of us to be of help and support to each other.I feel it for you and am sure others do too,and I admire you for being able to realise you can do something about it,please keep coming into the site and feel free to post with you progress ,or whenever you feel the need for support or even to vent we are here for you take care impish


----------

